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Some of them are "alright" but in general it's a bad move to contact them. Anytime I deal with a chick and I find out that she's still's close with her ex I say next. It's a red flag.
What's up with old flings/flames trying to friend on FB. I'm long married with kids and people from as long ago as 15-years-old are trying to contact me or my spouse. We've had exes messaging family, calling/texting cells, FB is the worst.
Is this normal? We don't think it's good to keep contact with past lovers. I wouldn't dream of trying to friend a HS BF. is it just us? I think it's like the golden rule. I'd hate it if my DH was talking to an ex. Hate it.
You're right. It's completely odd. I've had ex-bf's try to friend me on fb and I just ignore them. Once I'm done with a relationship I don't want to hear or see them again in any context (and it's not because they're bad people it's just that I'm not interested). It just seems that people reminisce and want to see how you're doing, but, it's just best not to go there and ignore them.
What's up with old flings/flames trying to friend on FB. I'm long married with kids and people from as long ago as 15-years-old are trying to contact me or my spouse. We've had exes messaging family, calling/texting cells, FB is the worst.
Is this normal? We don't think it's good to keep contact with past lovers. I wouldn't dream of trying to friend a HS BF. is it just us? I think it's like the golden rule. I'd hate it if my DH was talking to an ex. Hate it.
It's common. Several of my exes from long ago have contacted me through FB, and a few were on my friends list, including my date for my senior prom. (1984, yikes!)
But after a while, it got tedious. Too many questions, and in one case, too many weird apologies for things that happened 20 years ago. Also, too many reminders of why I broke up with them! ("Oh, yeah. Now I remember his effed-up politics/obnoxious behavior/irritating habits. Yeah. No. Goodbye. Again." Click, delete, block.)
Why would you "hate" it if your husband was talking to an ex from 15 years ago? Do you not trust him or his judgment?
I think its tacky to be overly friendly with an ex. I agree to just use that little delete button till your fingers fall off.
I would hate it too btw. I don't want to be known as the person who has a guy who constantly chats it up with the ex....makes you look like a fool that just fell off the turnip truck. Its not about trust. Its about shared values, respect and not wanting to stir up drama.
I parted ways with me ex-h 10 years ago. He abruptly left me for someone he met online. OK, good riddance. I got on with my life and moved away to another state. He eventually re-married, to someone not involved in our breakup. I met someone else too.
I still talk to his sister occasionally, about simple day to day things, not about him. I'm friends with her on FB, and I have some mutual friends with my ex on FB. Neither of us have sent a friend request to each other. His sister did once say in an email, oh, (ex) told me to say 'hello'". I just messaged to her 'hello back".
Then over these past holidays he sent me a FB message, just saying "Happy Holidays." Innocent enough, but I saw no reason to go there. I did tell my bf about this message and then I deleted it.
I did happen to notice on my ex's Friends list that he is friends with the one he left me for 10 years ago. I wonder if wife his current wife knows the truth about all that. And I wonder how his current marriage is going if he is suddenly sending a message to his ex-w after all these years....
For some reason do I have a rather good photo of myself on my bicycle on my FB profile...haha
This is a personal issue, and will differ from person to person.
For me, it would depend on the ex, how the relationship was, how it ended, etc.
I can see an ex where we left on good terms, where there is no romantic tension anymore, and where we could be friendly acquaintances to be "friends" on facebook. On the flip side, if it was someone where we had an ugly breakup, or unresolved feelings, or that sort of thing I may not want them as friends.
If someone you don't want to reconnect with is being pushy, just block them.
Some, the level-headed, I'll actually friend. Some, such as the whackjob who keyed my car at 2 a.m., I just reject out of hand. But I really don't encourage conversation. That being said, there was one friend of mine from high school who friended me and then proceeded to tell me about her years-long crush. I had no idea, and it left kind of an awkward situation. I told her I was flattered, but no dice. Yet she's still the one who will pretty much like or respond to every post I put on there.
Not getting this. If someone contacts you on FB that you don't like or know, block them.
It's not rocket science. If you don't want an ex getting in touch with you, it's takes .0001 seconds to block them.
Problem solved.
Not the point. We've had people pester our siblings too. My step daughter even had a girl MSG her to try to get my DH info. Old BF of mine have tried getting thru through mutual friends.
I just feel that not many people respect marriage anymore. It's like a previous poster said, if there looking good and are successful, it might be tempting on both my part and my spouse. Why put yourself in a situation that might make you tempted? Even IF you are a loyal honest faithful person.
It just bothers me. I'd never, and haven't ever friended a guy I've been intimate with. I'm happily married and have plenty of friends on FB not to go out looking for an ex.
Not the point. We've had people pester our siblings too. My step daughter even had a girl MSG her to try to get my DH info. Old BF of mine have tried getting thru through mutual friends.
I just feel that not many people respect marriage anymore. It's like a previous poster said, if there looking good and are successful, it might be tempting on both my part and my spouse. Why put yourself in a situation that might make you tempted? Even IF you are a loyal honest faithful person.
It just bothers me. I'd never, and haven't ever friended a guy I've been intimate with. I'm happily married and have plenty of friends on FB not to go out looking for an ex.
So then, your question is really not about FB. You should have worded your topic differently, and perhaps you would get answers better suited to your question.
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