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I can tell you a story I know first-hand. A guy who got cuckolded with TWO children, out of three that he has. Only his youngest daughter is his own, while his son and older daughter aren't. He discovered the fraud after many, many years, when his son was already at the university and his daughter graduate, while his youngest daughter was 16 years old. You can only imagine how crushed he was and he suspected nothing.
In fact, he figured out the fraud only lots of years later and he realized that his youngest daughter might be disputed. His wife guaranteed him that she wasn't, yet he couldn't get over the doubt and he had her and other two children tested voluntarily as well.
Only the youngest one was actually his own and his wife just pretended stupid and demanded him to pay for support. Seeing that he is already duped and that he has no way out of it, he embraced those children, although he was crushed he tried to make them feel great and he actually stopped his attempt to divorce just to stay with them. Real story, real people.
His wife has no shame and she never named who the father was.
Although he's on good terms with the children and provides for them equally, older two are seriously ashamed as I hear and they can't bear to look at his eyes, they have serious issues. They are all victims of this whole deal and are all devastated as well, although they try to move on.
People who argue that it doesn't happen are just ignorant and liars. I seriously came into temptation to name him even though it's not my business to name other people over forums so that every single person who posted in here would realize that there are real names and real people behind those stories. And how you know very little until you realize some things.
I wanted to ask him so many things because it's always other people speaking about it, those who were around there when the drama happened. And always when he isn't around. He doesn't speak about it and I never asked either but I acknowledged it to him that I know. The people who know him told me that the transformation was profound, he never was as quiet, he was always a cheerful guy before that. It was always so awkward to sit in the same place with him and see that he just keeps SILENT.
Way to go to "man up".
This is where a paternity test would of helped from the start of the very first child. I still think this will help many.
Get a vasectomy because I call bullshyt when I see it? Life kicks kids in the balls all the time. " Fire is hot. If you don't listen to me I will punish you. Vegetables are good for and cake is full of empty calories." Kids learn lessons all the time. In fact kids learn faster than adults. Once again you seem to be defending cheating women. If she cheats and has a kid it's fine as long as the cuckold cares for the kid right? And you didn't answer my question about if your son was cuckolded. You're okay with that as long as the kid is ok?
Nobody is okay with that. Nobody could ever be okay with that. It's devastating on so many levels and there's no discussion about it.
People may simply accpept their fate more often because they can't change it.
Worst thing about paternity fraud is that the deceiving behavior is rewarded. For the sake of everyone involved, primarily themselves, everyone must do paternity tests. Because the government still goes with the medieval logic where needs of men are donwplayed or disregarded since they should sacrifice their well-being for the society or someone else to prove their usefulness to the society.
This concept was though to have been died out long ago in the western world with the rise of "me before everyone else" behavior. Yet the legislation and media seem to be eager in their attempts to enforce such devastating logic in today's environment. Every guy is asking - what's in it for me? And when they get the standard demagogy displayed in this topic and shaming tactics, it's only natural that they'll do what's best for themselves and their peace of mind.
Too many posters still think that we live in the era is Napoleon or Austria-Hungary or whatever setting they imagine in their heads.
@10% of households. Yes, an estimate is that 7% of all children are raised by unsuspecting fathers, when the sampled data are extrapolated to the general demographics (general sample had middle and upper class groups being overrepresented and having close to 5% of children raised by unsuspecting parents). And given the average number of children per each households, they estimated that one in 10 households are having an unsuspecting father who raises a child that isn't his own. There is no difference between married or unmarried couples at all, unlike what some people may think.
Any guy knowing those facts and still accepting to believe on other person's word is just asking for everything that happens to them. We'll probably need a few more decades before most folks finally figure it out, but a large portion of children ARE tested already, otherwise the statistics would've been much worse. Many fathers unsuspectedly discovered the fraud while trying to have their peace of mind, then they even ran a new test to confirm it before they simply walked away. Better do it on time than living a life in suffering has proven to be a good thing.
This is where a paternity test would of helped from the start of the very first child. I still think this will help many.
This is right, but I think paternity testing wasn't an option at his time, at least not in the way it is today. it happened long, long ago. He never suspected it at all.
My issue is that people don't even know about what they're talking or they deliberately downplay it.
This is right, but I think paternity testing wasn't an option at his time, at least not in the way it is today. it happened long, long ago. He never suspected it at all.
My issue is that people don't even know about what they're talking or they deliberately downplay it.
They really don't. I believe its extremely important. And its only a cotton swab in the mouth of the mother, father and child. The test results come in the mail of the percentage of the father of the child. People whom don't want it probably are cheaters.
They really don't. I believe its extremely important. And its only a cotton swab in the mouth of the mother, father and child. The test results come in the mail of the percentage of the father of the child. People whom don't want it probably are cheaters.
This is true. It's a simple procedure that costs less than a shopping spree.
They really don't. I believe its extremely important. And its only a cotton swab in the mouth of the mother, father and child. The test results come in the mail of the percentage of the father of the child. People whom don't want it probably are cheaters.
Just curious, why is it extremely important.... no one in this thread has made a compelling reason as to why one should paternity test... I've already stated that I don't see the purpose in it.... I mean if the kid isn't biologically the husbands, what next... ship the kid off to the sperm donor?? what real good is gonna come out it.
Just curious, why is it extremely important.... no one in this thread has made a compelling reason as to why one should paternity test... I've already stated that I don't see the purpose in it.... I mean if the kid isn't biologically the husbands, what next... ship the kid off to the sperm donor?? what real good is gonna come out it.
The same reason why it's important to make sure the baby the woman gave birth to returns to the mother after its been cleaned: it's theirs. If he's going to care for a child at least make sure it's something he contributed to. If you say paternity doesn't matter then maternity doesn't matter either. If the kid isn't the man's then the woman should go after the father. Why is it ok to let a woman get away with getting pregnant by another man? For the good of the child doesn't hold water since if the woman cared about the child she would want it to be raised by the rightful father. By that logic it's ok for men to sleep with married women and impregnate them since the husband has to raise it anyway.
Just curious, why is it extremely important.... no one in this thread has made a compelling reason as to why one should paternity test... I've already stated that I don't see the purpose in it.... I mean if the kid isn't biologically the husbands, what next... ship the kid off to the sperm donor?? what real good is gonna come out it.
It would stop a lot of cheating if the government made it mandatory. Women wouldn't think of straying without a divorce first. It will eventually stop men who were also promisicious and pay support instead of a lot of aide from the government. Less tax dollars. Which if men and women were made to pay it would stop 3, 4, 5 baby daddy's. I think in the future it will make it a lot easier to tract down criminal's dna in the future.
Yes I see the downfalls of families destroyed. Father's crushed. Mother's having to answer horrible questions and face their children.
But I think if it was well known that this was done people would be more careful. Chow I'm included in this. I have learned a lot that to create life means huge responsibilities. And painful questions.
It would stop a lot of cheating if the government made it mandatory. Women wouldn't think of straying without a divorce first. It will eventually stop men who were also promisicious and pay support instead of a lot of aide from the government. Less tax dollars. Which if men and women were made to pay it would stop 3, 4, 5 baby daddy's. I think in the future it will make it a lot easier to tract down criminal's dna in the future.
Yes I see the downfalls of families destroyed. Father's crushed. Mother's having to answer horrible questions and face their children.
But I think if it was well known that this was done people would be more careful. Chow I'm included in this. I have learned a lot that to create life means huge responsibilities. And painful questions.
This is correct. If you were held accountable for cheating you probably wouldn't do it. Yes there will be hurt feelings, but it's for the best.
It would stop a lot of cheating if the government made it mandatory. Women wouldn't think of straying without a divorce first. It will eventually stop men who were also promisicious and pay support instead of a lot of aide from the government. Less tax dollars. Which if men and women were made to pay it would stop 3, 4, 5 baby daddy's. I think in the future it will make it a lot easier to tract down criminal's dna in the future.
Yes I see the downfalls of families destroyed. Father's crushed. Mother's having to answer horrible questions and face their children.
But I think if it was well known that this was done people would be more careful. Chow I'm included in this. I have learned a lot that to create life means huge responsibilities. And painful questions.
Interesting answer.....
The only time I would agree would be at birth.... I don't see the need for it when the kids are older..... that was the crux of my argument....... the devastation wouldn't be worth it......
At birth isn't great either, but if it helps curb nefarious activities on the parents side... IDK...
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