Women want bad boys over nice guys. A bunch of bologna. (friends, daughter)
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Why do men overwhelmingly prefer to date women in their twenties? What do they have that a woman of say a woman in her fifties doesn't have?
It is not a conscious decision, it is something instilled in men through evolution of human species. Women between ages of 18-24 are at the peak of their child bearing age, and this is why men seek them. If you look at online profiles for example, this age group is not represented well. Its because most girls in this age group normaly have several guys chasing them as it is. Ive heard other theories, but this one seems to make the most sense.
We are saying that women in their young years don't want nice guys.
Older women are the ones who want nice guys.
The young women want the bad boys.
Then once these women are used up and abused by the bad boys, they want the nice, reliable guys.
Quoted for truth, as uncomfortable as it may be for some. More often than not, the nice guy ends up taking care of bad boys offspring because somebody has to. When women age, all of a sudden the predictability and a steady paycheck that nice guys usually bring to the table, look alot more enticing.
Instead of saying gee maybe thee reason why women don't me is because I'm either a slob, no personality, fat, loser.
They use the nice guy COP OUT.
I use to sympathize with guys like this. I actually use to be one of those guys until I was woken up.
The thing is guys don't want to look in the mirror and think there the problem.
Instead they blame THEIR SHORTCOMMINGS on women instead of taking responsibility for their weaknesses.
Some poster try to say why should a guy have to improve yourself to impress women.
Of course you have to improve yourself to impress women!
So let me geuss a guy who has a beer belly with flabby arms and cigeratte breath with yellow teeth is going to score a chick like this
LMAO....THEY THINK THEIR ENTITLED TO THESE TYPE OF WOMEN WITHOUT PUTTING ANYWORK IN THEMSELVES..
IT'S HYSTERICAL..
These so called "nice guys" which are nothing but lazy, no personality, doormats who think they are entitled to women because they pretend to be chivalrous when in reality.
There not real nice guys.
I'll actually give them a new name whining simps.
I disagree.
All guys who don't have success with women are not all bad looking creeps.
There are many good looking, handsome males in America who don't get any attention from women.
We are saying that women in their young years don't want nice guys.
Older women are the ones who want nice guys.
The young women want the bad boys.
Then once these women are used up and abused by the bad boys, they want the nice, reliable guys.
My response to that? They aren't looking in the right places.
It's kind of like guys who can't find a woman who spend all their time in bars. Well, the only women you're going to pick up in bars are women who hang out in bars.
Quoted for truth, as uncomfortable as it may be for some. More often than not, the nice guy ends up taking care of bad boys offspring because somebody has to. When women age, all of a sudden the predictability and a steady paycheck that nice guys usually bring to the table, look alot more enticing.
hahahah, so the nice guy sits around til the girl is desperate and will go back to him because she won't look at him til she realizes that she needs someone who will do whatever she says.
Quoted for truth, as uncomfortable as it may be for some. More often than not, the nice guy ends up taking care of bad boys offspring because somebody has to. When women age, all of a sudden the predictability and a steady paycheck that nice guys usually bring to the table, look alot more enticing.
What about the millions of men and women who don't live that kind life style? Those who are married, have careers, kids, etc? I don't know why the people on this strive for the former and not the latter.
Let's dissect this and put it in the context of my particular situation. And, just for the record, I am not disputing any of what was posted... all valid points.
So, with that said, let's proceed...
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223
Not ANOTHER of these threads. Jeez.
Once more for the learning disabled:
1) Women don't want bad boys. They want men who aren't afraid of living their lives. Big difference. Agreed. No issues there as I follow that to a T.
2) 99% of the time, men who term themselves nice guys aren't nice guys. They are just too timid to have an opinion or assert themselves. Real nice guys are guys who know how to stand up for themselves, live interesting lives, and still treat others with decency and courtesy. Because they want to, not because they feel they have no other alternative. Exactamundo. Again, no issues with that one.
3) Having good manners is not the same thing as being an effete pushover. Good manners, to me, is a given. Why WOULDN'T anyone want to have good manners? Again, check.
4) No matter what, women like men who make their move and are unapologetic about it. It has nothing to do with being nice or not being nice. It has everything to do with being a man. If you can't seize the moment and go for a kiss by the end of a second date, she'll start to wonder about your testosterone levels and treat you accordingly. Well... hafta take issue with that one, primarily because I am a person who has issues with understanding NVC (nonverbal communication). Nevertheless, a valid point.
5) No matter what, women despise men who treat them with all the delicacy of a Ming vase. Check.
6) There is a difference between being adored and being worshipped. All women want the first and despise being the second. Put a woman up on a pedestal and she will hate you for doing it. It is way too much of a burden. Again, check.
7) It is not contradictory to really like a woman and be unwilling to put up with her bullish*t. She will respect you a lot more if you assert yourself in that regard. No issue there. Being assertive about who you are and what you want and what you are willing to tolerate in a partner... again, given.
8) Why do you lack a date on Saturday night? We can boil it down to several possible solutions:
-- You don't respect yourself enough to dress well. If your wardrobe consists mainly of plaid or free polo shirts that you picked up from various software vendors over the years, you fit into this category. That's stuff you wear when working in the yard, not when you go out in public. For it tells the world that you're too cheap or too lazy to buy yourself some decent attire. It always floors me that guys demand that women look hot and yet pay not the slightest bit of attention to how they dress themselves. You'll never catch me wearing rags, 'wife-beaters', holey jeans/shirts/etc. Now I am no 'fashionista' - thank god - but I have good sense of what looks good and what doesn't.
-- You don't respect yourself enough to take care of yourself. No, you don't have to spend two hours daily huffing and puffing at the gym. But hoist yourself off the couch and do something, anything. If you hate to run, buy a bicycle. Hell, just go out for a stroll everyday. And get a decent haircut. Anything besides looking like some pasty-faced troglodyte who watches 7 hours of television a night and has his hand permanently jammed into a Doritos bag. I watch very little TV - just cooking and home-improvement shows and the news. No standard network garbage, reality TV, TMZ, blah blah. Nope. I also am not a 'gamer'... never had any interest in that sort of thing... I do know exactly of what you say about guys who are obsessive over them though and it's ridiculous to say the least. I also walk and run and like to keep in shape.
-- You haven't grown up. Women like men, not boys. If you are over the age of 18 and you are still playing more than a couple of hours of video and computer games a week, you are either in this category or in danger of being in this category. Life is a freaking banquet, filled with interesting people and interesting things to do. And you're starving to death by sitting on your couch shooting imaginary aliens. LOL. See above re video games.
-- Be self-sufficient. This includes living not with your parents. By the time you're 23, there is no excuse on the planet why you shouldn't be out of your own, or at least have a roommate. To not do so makes you some manchild who can't stand on his own two feet. And that also means being able to cook your own meals, do your own laundry, and run a vacuum cleaner once a week. When a woman comes to your apartment, she wants to know that a man lives there, not some overgrown frat boy. Been on my own with my own place since 22 - no roommates, no way. Sorry, but I value my space and my property way too much for that. And as far as all the 'domestic' stuff... no issues. I actually enjoy doing those things and have done them even before I moved out of the parents' place.
-- Do something with your life. It doesn't mean you have be an arbitrage lawyer on Wall Street, or a doctor, or a high-powered businessman. Just have a reason to get up in the morning and have a plan. Hell, do charitable work. Write novels. Be the best damned carpenter in town. Play the saxophone. ANYTHING besides staring at the idiot box six hours every night. Just do something you love and be really, really good at it. That's all you need. I have a decent job, make my own money, and also make money 'on the side' - yes, legally, LOL! Good point about writing as that is something I enjoy although concentrating on it can be a challenge!
9) Quit whining. Everybody hates whining. That includes passive-aggressive behavior and wondering why the world won't deliver happiness to your doorstep. Because it's something you have to go out and find on your own. Agreed, but easier said than done in the real world.
10) If you haven't had a steady girlfriend by the time you're 22, it ain't them. It's you. And it ain't because you're short or ugly or don't make a lot of money. It's because your attitude in life makes you an undesirable person to be around, a veritable millstone around the neck of anyone foolish enough to come within a country mile of you. You exhaust anyone who might initially treat you with kindness. Stop being that person right now. Had my first 'real relationship' at 20. Had several more afterwards but it has become much more difficult, especially now, in my 40s.
There. The definitive Nice Guy/Bad Boy thread. Can we now move to ban all future threads on this topic once and for all?
So there it is. All the 'right' things and yet I still have mucho difficulty with women. Why? Well, it isn't about any of the items listed above... as I said earlier, all valid points, cannot be disputed, etc. However, what is interesting is that LOOKS wasn't taken ever into account. Not once. no, not talking about clothes, haircuts, etc., BTW, I am clean-shaven and bald. No combovers on this head, nuh-uh!
So what's left? Height and facial bone structure. Especially height. Now before the usual suspects start throwing up their hands, punching the sky, etc. here is a quote from another thread and this may just be the answer to my particular situation. It has absolutely NOTHING to do with the 'nice guy/bad boy' crap either. Here it is:
"You want the whole package though, not just the penis. Seeing a man with very long strong legs and arms is a turn on. It's just something about his presence that is more stimulating than what a short man can bring. Taller men can lift you up and move you around a lot more. More aggression and passion. I feel safe, protected. A short guy can't do that, and if he does it just doesn't have the same effect."
What's the point? It's still all about LOOKS - and, to me, height is a part of looks. Specifically, it's about raw sexual attraction. A man can be the most wonderful in all ways BUT if he doesn't generate the sexual attraction part then he's dead in the water. No question. Physical attractiveness is the absolute foundation, the bedrock upon which everything else is built.
How do I know this? I have been rejected specifically for the reasons cited in the above quote. I have been told those things to my face.
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