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I still don't get why alimony is necessary in this day and age, when both spouses can and usually do work throughout the majority of their marriage. Child support, I can see. They're your kids. You have to feed and clothe them.
Alimony? Not if the other spouse had been working the whole time and has a career of his or her own. That's ridiculous.
I suppose the argument is that if someone gives up 15 years of his or her life and career to stay home and raise kids, they should at least be able to get on their feet long enough to get their own career back in shape, but let's be honest here: How many men do that? Less than women, that's for sure.
I guess I don't understand how alimony works. When my ex and I divorced, we both laughed at the suggestion.
My husband and I both work, so I don't think alimony would be an option for us, despite his making significantly more money than I do. I think it only makes sense when one spouse can demonstrate a significant loss of earning potential due to sacrifices made, and even then it might not be awarded for the rest of someone's life.
Alimony was originally established to keep moms and kids off the streets, and it's in the state's best interest to avoid being liable for welfare whenever possible. However, with more and more families where both spouses work, it's becoming somewhat archaic. I think spousal support has merit in some instances but not by mere dint of divorce.
Completely agreed. Alimony is basically a "you're not good enough" payment.
Still confused by the one poster stating:
We have 4 children. It is expensive to raise them. The more money I can make, the less gap he has to fill in with child support (for their necessities) and other "fees" for incidentals.
As an example...they all play travel sports which is a significant cost to us. If I were working a $10 an hour job, I could not contribute to those funds so that is something they'd either have to give up or he would have to pay for.
He would never tell them they couldn't pursue their sports if he could afford to pay for them (which he could), but he'd save a lot of money in the long run if I could contribue towards it.
We have 4 children. It is expensive to raise them. The more money I can make, the less gap he has to fill in with child support (for their necessities) and other "fees" for incidentals.
THat is exactly what child support is for.
You don't need alimony on top of that.
That being said, that's assuming you get custody and he doesn't try to get custody for himself. Because in this day and age, a custody battle doesn't automatically go in favour of the mother. If the father is making more money, courts are likely to look at that closely.
That being said, that's assuming you get custody and he doesn't try to get custody for himself. Because in this day and age, a custody battle doesn't automatically go in favour of the mother. If the father is making more money, courts are likely to look at that closely.
He wouldn't ask for custody because he knows he couldn't keep them full-time.
And child support is for necessities (or at least it is for those of my friends that either pay or receive it). Travel sports are not necessities, braces are not necessities..etc.
And child support is for necessities (or at least it is for those of my friends that either pay or receive it). Travel sports are not necessities, braces are not necessities..etc.
CHild support is for support for the children. You get a set amount depending on a few factors, including his paycheck and the number of kids involved.
What you spend it on is your perogative. It's preferable that it's spent on the kids, but courts and himself cannot dictate what you spend your child support on.
Therefore, the logical course of action in this case would be to spend the child support on the extra-curriculars, and then use your own job to support everything else.
CHild support is for support for the children. You get a set amount depending on a few factors, including his paycheck and the number of kids involved.
What you spend it on is your perogative. It's preferable that it's spent on the kids, but courts and himself cannot dictate what you spend your child support on.
Therefore, the logical course of action in this case would be to spend the child support on the extra-curriculars, and then use your own job to support everything else.
No, logic would have me spend child support on half of the the kids living expenses FIRST and then pay for incidentals if there is anything left over. At $25K a year, and whatever child support I get, that would hardly leave money left over to pay for any of their incidentals.
No, logic would have me spend child support on half of the the kids living expenses FIRST and then pay for incidentals if there is anything left over. At $25K a year, and whatever child support I get, that would hardly leave money left over to pay for any of their incidentals.
Then the incidentals should be cut back, or he should pay the incidentals directly.
Either way, he doesn't owe you money for the incidentals.
Then the incidentals should be cut back, or he should pay the incidentals directly.
Either way, he doesn't owe you money for the incidentals.
That's exactly my point. If he were to leave and I could get my teaching license renewed I'd be able to contribute more. He wouldn't have to foot that bill entirely.
I didn't say he'd owe me money for incidentals. I said it would be in his best interest to pay alimony for a year or so to get me back on my feet and earning more than $10 an hour. It would work out cheaper in the long run for him because I could split those payments with him.
At any rate, this is all just hypothetical. It's not likely he's going to up and leave, we have a good marriage. I was using our job situation as an example for alimony.
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