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What astounds me about this thread is that people are describing a female "6" - which is solidly average - as low hanging fruit. I would love to see a picture of anyone who believes this.
What astounds me about this post is that someone would want to make this discussion into an argument about how the number system is used rather than trying to converse about the actual subject of the thread.
And I feel, if you get rejected, you revise your approach and try again. I have won over couple of ladies at different times who initially gave me the cold shoulder. Later on I found out that they both thought I was really cute but instinctively they played hard-to-get which would have made an average lad think he was being rejected because but I was able to read their body language and pushed on.
Sometimes, a No could mean something like "Nah, try again....please!"
You have to be careful with this kind of approach. True, sometimes women act coy and hard to get. But what happens when you keep going and they really meant no? That's going to land you in trouble, especially if it's in a professional environment.
What astounds me about this thread is that people are describing a female "6" - which is solidly average - as low hanging fruit. I would love to see a picture of anyone who believes this.
Getting anyone to agree on what a "6" looks like would be hard enough, let alone what the guy calling her a "6" looks like. It's in the eye of the beholder unless you're talking about people who are off the charts beautiful that virtually everyone can agree to.
over the years i've met a number of guys who will completely avoid women they're truly attracted to, and will deliberately go for "low hanging fruit". it's something i just don't understand.
the other day, i was chatting with a fellow at a bar. he said to me, "man, goin for the hottest girl is just dumb". i totally disagree with this for the following reasons:
1) first - i disagree with the perspective that you're pursuing the "hottest" girl. the way i see it, you're pursuing the one you find yourself most attracted to. this might seem like a distinction without a difference, but i think it's important because the former perspective implies an objective assessment (ie, others agree that she's the most attractive), whereas the latter suggests a more subjective one - you don't care what others think of her, you just know that you're really into her. when you know that the girl you're talkin to is not the one you're most attracted to, you won't put your best foot forward. at least for me, i find myself getting alot wittier and sharp around a woman i'm attracted to, than when i'm around someone i'm not so sure about. and i'm certain that just about any woman can sense this. i'm not very good at "faking it", and i suspect most guys aren't either (although many mistakenly believe they are).
2) if i consistently avoided the ones i was really into, over time, my confidence would take a big hit. i can't imagine telling myself on a regular basis, "forget about her - you could never get that girl" and keep my self esteem intact.
3) the false belief that if you go for "average" looking girls, your odds of hooking up will be higher - in my experience, attitude is simply not a function of looks, and i've met plenty of gorgeous women who were super nice and friendly, and plenty of average looking women that were bitter and rude. in other words, you simply cannot use her looks as an indicator of how receptive she's goin to be of your advances. IIRC, OKCupid even released the results of a study that found that girls in the 7-8 range were the ones that were most selective, because they would get contacted far more than either the 6s (and below) or the 9s and 10s.
i also think there's another false assumption that leads to this conclusion - that the "average" woman's internal assessment of potential mates matches yours, ie, a guy who's a 7 thinks that if he goes for a girl he believes to be a 7, he's playing "within his league", but of course the assumption here is that she, too, believes that he is a 7. yet the truth is that she might well consider him a 4!
4) finally, i think it's just plain selfish to "settle" like this. i sure as hell wouldn't want to be with someone that settled for me, and i think it's unfair to the other person since you're just wasting their time. they could instead continue their search for someone who really wants to be with them, instead of wasting their time on you.
the only time it makes any sense is if you've been on a really long dry spell and just want to release some tension, but even so i think the whole affair should be as transparent as possible to all involved, ie, no one should be misled or deceived.
thoughts/comments?
I think hardly anybody would ever get married or settle down with someone if everybody kept it this rigid. In some cases this could be a blessing since half of all marriages are garbage matches anyway that end up failing sooner or later and probably never should have happened in the first place, but in other's, a great match could have been made if everyone had kept a bit more of an open mind and gave the person a chance that didn't immediately "wow" them on paper or in person. (Especially for the women, since they tend to judge a "winner" less on looks and more so on other things that aren't obvious by simply glancing at somebody from across the room.) So it's a bit of a double edged sword playing mind games about who you believe (or not) is realistic or appropriate or in your "league".
All you can do is know yourself well enough to be honest about what you really like and what you would really put the effort in for, and focus on those. You can't make them like or love you back obviously, but that's the chance you have to take. It boils down to a man and his dreams. If the dream is to get into "that school" or land "that job" or drive "that car" or get "that girl", then that's what you should go after until they make you take no for an answer, and there's no shame in that.
What astounds me about this thread is that people are describing a female "6" - which is solidly average - as low hanging fruit. I would love to see a picture of anyone who believes this.
LOL, so true.
For the record, we don't sit around and rank women, but in the rare moments that he have, to hear some of my guy friends rank women is hilarious. I'd say on average they rank women two points lower than what I (and a few of my other friends) would. In other words, I'd say she's a 9, the response would be, oh no, she's a 7.
Ironically, my friends who date more aren't as nearly as harsh. And it's not because they pursue 'low hanging fruit', rather they are far less judgmental and more accepting of their own flaws.
(Especially for the women, since they tend to judge a "winner" less on looks and more so on other things that aren't obvious by simply glancing at somebody from across the room.)
And I feel, if you get rejected, you revise your approach and try again. I have won over couple of ladies at different times who initially gave me the cold shoulder. Later on I found out that they both thought I was really cute but instinctively they played hard-to-get which would have made an average lad think he was being rejected because but I was able to read their body language and pushed on.
Sometimes, a No could mean something like "Nah, try again....please!"
Hell no! dude, what makes her think she's so special that dudes have to bend over backwards to win her over. No thanks I got my own shyt to take care of and I don't have time to be out chasing some chick who like to play games. She says no, dudes should go on to the next one.
What astounds me about this post is that someone would want to make this discussion into an argument about how the number system is used rather than trying to converse about the actual subject of the thread.
I have no problem with the number system. Please digest what you read before lashing out.
Getting anyone to agree on what a "6" looks like would be hard enough, let alone what the guy calling her a "6" looks like. It's in the eye of the beholder unless you're talking about people who are off the charts beautiful that virtually everyone can agree to.
Of course, but a 6 is average. What I call average may differ that your call, but at the end of day dating someone who is average is not dating low hanging fruit, unless you yourself are well above average. If you are a 9, then yes a 6 is low hanging fruit. So I would like to see the 9s on this thread.
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I got my own shyt to take care of and I don't have time to be out chasing some chick who like to play games. She says no, dudes should go on to the next one.
