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I have a very pretty friend whose husband just told her he's leaving her for a coworker. The coworker is a single mom of 2 kids and a LOT less attractive than my friend. What's up with that?
If I had to guess I'd say that your very pretty friend may have grown up receiving special treatment for being very pretty, and may therefore be difficult to live with as an adult. After achieving the dream of marrying the pretty girl, the guy may have discovered that there are more important qualities to look for in a life partner.
Obviously I don't know these people, and I have no idea what happened, but that's one possible scenario, at least.
Elysian, do not kid yourself, everyone eventually settles with someone for whatever reasons. Some think they found their true love then a few months later they are getting divorced. Some think they are settling with a "low hanging fruit" but only to realize later on that they married the right fruit and their attitude on the altitude of the fruit naturally changes. Besides as we get older, our fruits start to hang low anyhow.
Don't read too much into any topic that involves more than 1 person.
There is no shred of evidence that life should be taken seriously! Just enjoy it.
I think that sometimes less attractive women seem to have to work a little harder to attract men, that seems to be that they are more friendly and personable, IDK... maybe I'm off base, but sometimes it just isn't always about a woman's looks..... at least not for me... I wouldn't say I went for low hanging fruit, as the OP describes... I just went after women I was attracted to.
I was never attracted to the stereotypical cheerleader type that so many men seem to like. I also never really found the supermodels types to be all that attractive.... I guess I'm a weird guy...
I think it's good to approach a variety of people, because you never know who's going to click with you. A 6 could turn into an 8 or 9 in your eyes if you discover she's into your same car hobby, or whatever, has a great personality, and turns out to be hot in bed.
Ok everybody, toss your shoes off, but keep your socks on so you can dance to this song. Hopefully you have wood floors like I do so your socks will help you slide better as you dance. I've always loved this song and I think it is very fitting for this thread. I bet it will put a smile on your face.
Ok everybody, toss your shoes off, but keep your socks on so you can dance to this song. Hopefully you have wood floors like I do so your socks will help you slide better as you dance. I've always loved this song and I think it is very fitting for this thread. I bet it will put a smile on your face.
Actually game theory would apply even more to long-term relationships and marriage than to quickies or phone numbers. People can have any number of hookup partners and can give out or receive as many phone numbers as they want, but marriage (theoretically, anyway) only happens once for each person and with only one other person, at least in traditional Western culture. And since there are an approximately equal number of men and women, it's a zero-sum game. That means pretty much anyone can find someone if they're willing to lower their standards far enough. If they're not willing to do that, though, they end up alone and bitter that they weren't able to be with the most desirable person. After all, that "10" may give out their number to 100 people, and may hook up with 30 people, but they're only marrying one person. The rest have to make another choice or be alone. So rational people "settle" for the sure thing rather than holding out for the person that they have a very low (if any) chance of getting.
That's game theory. It's an observational theory, not a strategy, so it can't be said to "work for" people or not work for people. It just describes what people do. This is an actual scientific theory used by social sciences to describe how people make decisions. From your message I think you may have thought it was some lame PUA strategy or something.
i'm not arguing that game theory describes the way people behave in the dating world - in my initial post i already stated that this is, in fact, exactly what many guys already do. what i disagree with is the reasons and justifications for doing so, which i find questionable, especially since many guys are consciously aware of the choices they're making when picking women to pursue.
my focus here isn't on the search for someone to shack up with (either for just a single night, or for the rest of your life). it's finding someone you truly want to be with.
i guess it just comes down to the individual. i don't think i would be happy doin something like this, but if it works for others...oh well.
I think that sometimes less attractive women seem to have to work a little harder to attract men, that seems to be that they are more friendly and personable, IDK... maybe I'm off base, but sometimes it just isn't always about a woman's looks..... at least not for me... I wouldn't say I went for low hanging fruit, as the OP describes... I just went after women I was attracted to.
I was never attracted to the stereotypical cheerleader type that so many men seem to like. I also never really found the supermodels types to be all that attractive.... I guess I'm a weird guy...
if you went for those you were really attracted to, then you did the absolute right thing, not just for yourself but also the other person.
my point is NOT that any guy that's with a average lookin girl is a loser/weird/settler, but that guys who do it deliberately, knowing full well that they're not all that into the girl, are the ones i don't understand.
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