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I have gotten this saying a few times and a few variations; "that is why you are single", " you will always be single with that attitude", "when you end up old and alone".
I think pulling the single card is very bad taste for these reasons.
1. You do not know whether the person is even looking for a mate or even cares about finding a mate.
2. The person may have a emotional reason why they choose to be single. A bad marriage or relationship may turn them off dating, choosing not to replace a mate who has passed on, frustration with dating, etc.
3. Our society holds marriage and family up as the holy grail, which downgrades single folks already. Basically if you are single by choice or not by choice you are a loser.
So basically I think it is just an insult to say "why you are single."
Agree?
I agree, I think that it can be insulting. It's like a character assassination. Well, if your single than it must be you. I don't ever make people feel like this. I have been single before and to me it was no big deal. I'm with someone now, but when I was single, I wasn't the type to have to have someone all the time. I actually enjoyed some of my single time to my relationship time. I just was never that person that always had to have someone. I was very picky and I have/ had waited for the "right one". Settling for me was never an option. I couldn't imagine being with someone who did nothing for me. Relationships are just too tough. Even my current one sure has its ups and downs. I don't think this site helps it! lol. But again, I would never assume someone is a "loser" or the reason why they are alone is "them". It takes two to make a good relationship. I've had plenty of bad ones, enough to know when I found the right one. But it sure took me some time. I have many friends who are single now after years of marriage. Marriage is about the only thing I haven't done yet. I come from a family of both parents. So I have always viewed "marriage" as pretty sacred. Not just something to do for a few years and then quit. I view it as something that is a lot of hard work and is final. Probably why I haven't taken that jump yet. But there are so many single people today, It would be ignorant and arrogant for me to think I know why any one person was single. I think dating is harder today with the "internet age". I've stated this many times before. People just aren't getting out enough.
I agree with one big exception: This forum. Or, more specifically, the Relationships sub-forum. When people come here and ask for dating advice and then repeatedly show themselves to be rude, sexist (in either direction), spoiled, unrealistic, or willfully obstinate, then yes, I will tell them, "That is why you are single."
But people suddenly bringing one's marital status into an unrelated debate or discussion is uncalled for and inappropriate.
I have gotten this saying a few times and a few variations; "that is why you are single", " you will always be single with that attitude", "when you end up old and alone".
I think pulling the single card is very bad taste for these reasons.
1. You do not know whether the person is even looking for a mate or even cares about finding a mate.
2. The person may have a emotional reason why they choose to be single. A bad marriage or relationship may turn them off dating, choosing not to replace a mate who has passed on, frustration with dating, etc.
3. Our society holds marriage and family up as the holy grail, which downgrades single folks already. Basically if you are single by choice or not by choice you are a loser.
So basically I think it is just an insult to say "why you are single."
Agree?
Yep, I agree. I think only a small minority of people really want to know "why they're single" so they can couple up, but the rest would be just fine being single if matrimania and singlism wasn't constantly thrown in their faces.
I think if people stopped being so uptight about stuff like this, everything would be much easier and more fun
I haven't found it to be a problem (just the opposite...guys seem to like it from my experience), but I only dress up for things like Comic Con and Halloween. What invariably happens with me though is that I attract guys who live and breathe that type of thing; I enjoy it, but it's just a very small part of my life. I don't live to talk about Star Wars non-stop, lol.
I agree with one big exception: This forum. Or, more specifically, the Relationships sub-forum. When people come here and ask for dating advice and then repeatedly show themselves to be rude, sexist (in either direction), spoiled, unrealistic, or willfully obstinate, then yes, I will tell them, "That is why you are single."
.
Yeah, and even when they claim that how they are online isn't how they are in real life, you have to wonder how much of that bad attitude seeps out.
I have gotten this saying a few times and a few variations; "that is why you are single", " you will always be single with that attitude", "when you end up old and alone".
I think pulling the single card is very bad taste for these reasons.
1. You do not know whether the person is even looking for a mate or even cares about finding a mate.
2. The person may have a emotional reason why they choose to be single. A bad marriage or relationship may turn them off dating, choosing not to replace a mate who has passed on, frustration with dating, etc.
3. Our society holds marriage and family up as the holy grail, which downgrades single folks already. Basically if you are single by choice or not by choice you are a loser.
So basically I think it is just an insult to say "why you are single."
Agree?
See? Now this is why your single!
Just kidding of course. Yes, a lot of people are presumptious when they throw this out at others in the real world. Unless they know your interested in a relationship and seeking constructive criticism, they are just making assumptions based on societal stereotypes.
Strange, I look down on married people. In my head of course-never out loud. That's an a**hole move.
Poor suckers. Playing into the "system": typical, ordinary, boring.
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Just kidding of course. Yes, a lot of people are presumptious when they throw this out at others in the real world. Unless they know your interested in a relationship and seeking constructive criticism, they are just making assumptions based on societal stereotypes.
