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This is like the Bar. People come to cry in their beer and vent. They won't typically take advice because they really already have their minds made up. Their real goal is to share their story whether they realize it or not.
This is why I always try to have an alchoholic beverage in hand when I come to the forums to collect my tears. That way I can multitask.
This is like the sound bite Bar. People come to cry in their beer and vent for a quick moment. They won't typically take advice because they really already have their minds made up. Their real goal is to just share their story and vent whether they realize it or not.
Most of these guys are looking for attention who fall into that category. They will claim to be unattractive so females will inflate their ego more and encouraging these guys only makes it worse. They always claim have some major shortcoming they tend to focus on, like small endowment, being too short, too fat, too skinny, etc. They always focus on the physical aspect and only what they can change physically so this female will be drawn to them, but from what I've observed it's rarely about the physical shortcoming. They never want to do any self improvement or any actual work to improve their social skills, they just want to be told they're attractive physically. I see this constantly on here and other online forums like it. It's so predictable.
I'm the one here who probably has the worst case of sitting back and complaining rather than taking action. As I mentioned, my entire resume with the opposite sex consists of a few half-*****ed attempts at pursuing girls and a couple times where I was blacked-out drunk and girls wanted to make out with me.
So far, I'm pessimistic about how I'll fare in the dating world. I think that being attractive is just a thing that a guy naturally has or not. I have seen some guys go from being horrible with girls to being good with them, but it's always for one of the following reasons:
(1) He became rich.
(2) He wasn't good looking, but then became good looking. For example, a guy who had some handsome potential that came out when he finally lost weight, or a guy who developed into a way more handsome dude when he hit a certain age.
(3) He was good looking, but had irrational confidence issues or was so shy that he never actually tried with women. Once he finally started trying, it was easy for him.
I really haven't seen examples of average dudes becoming womanizers by just learning to be "confident" or whatever.
I'm the one here who probably has the worst case of sitting back and complaining rather than taking action. As I mentioned, my entire resume with the opposite sex consists of a few half-*****ed attempts at pursuing girls and a couple times where I was blacked-out drunk and girls wanted to make out with me.
Most people have to "fail" before achieving success in the dating world. I put "fail" in quotations because relationships that I saw as failures have helped me along the way. I used to be bad at dating and made a lot of mistakes, but I've learned from them and my two year anniversary with my girlfriend is two days away.
I understand being apprehensive, but at least trying has to be better than what you're doing now.
Overwhelmingly, the young men who post on CD about their lack of success with women, seem to put far more effort into complaining about the women than they do in wooing them.
Poster after poster wants a girlfriend back and pines after her, but they rarely (if ever) seem to give her much thought or attention when she's in front of them...only when she's gone.
Guys, if you put as much emotion into the relationship as you do into its aftermath, you probably wouldn't be split up in the first place.
Also, if you put as much effort into meeting someone as you do into complaining about those you want to meet and don't, you would probably be way more popular and busy on a Saturday night.
Where are you getting that from?
It's hard to summarize the actions of two people over the course of 24 hours, in a small text window. Add YEARS to that.
I think it's unfair and a huge assumption to make that statement.
Or if you would just speak up when you find something that makes you unhappy, then it's possible that issues could be resolved. If Person A started a discussion, Person B would be able to explain why something is done the way it is. Or Person B could get a sense of what Person A is saying, and be willing to adjust.
Imagine that!
Oh, and let's not forget that relationships are not constantly exciting and blissful. Like everything else in life there are highs and lows. In relationships, it's called The 7-Year Itch. BUT, most people don't hang around to wait for the next level of caring and committment. They just bail when they aren't getting what they want - and without asking.
you wouldn't be suggesting people communicate? I think that is a lost art
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you wouldn't be suggesting people communicate? I think that is a lost art
