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Old 07-14-2013, 03:45 PM
FBJ
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,605 posts, read 58,992,680 times
Reputation: 9451

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Quote:
Originally Posted by nald View Post
If there's a minus rep, I'd award it for this post. On what earth do you live please, it's quite clear that older guys still compete for younger women and it's very clear that older women don't have less suitors to ask them for sex - it's just that many women on this forum phrased it like this - "I don't want that, I've been there for years and I'll rather be alone instead of having random sex".

Unlike what you said, there's a proof that guy's standards for prostitution are rock-bottom-low. Check out the average prostitutes that get arrested and you'll get the point. I've lived in a "hood" at the time of my first year in America and I had the chance to walk near many women who were obviously on drugs and doing prostitution. None of them was anything like Ivanovic that other forum member posted, not even close.

Given that guys are ready to pay a trashy person to have sex, even if only 20$... I think it's rather about HAVING SEX than running after a lifetime mate for many. This is enforced by society's standards as well.


Yes because you have to have daily releases since it's good for your health
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Old 07-14-2013, 03:53 PM
 
Location: moved
13,644 posts, read 9,698,765 times
Reputation: 23452
Quote:
Originally Posted by nald View Post
...
Given that guys are ready to pay a trashy person to have sex, even if only 20$... I think it's rather about HAVING SEX than running after a lifetime mate for many. This is enforced by society's standards as well. By lowering their standards substantially, by adapting to situation and pretending to be charming, chivalrous, or a big ruffian, many guys (including the old guys) are really hitting rock-bottom-low just to stick their penis in some vagina. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes they can't put with the hassle and they seek for that drugged prostitute who could be having numerous diseases as well.
We're discussing relationships here, not casual sex. If you're disappointed with the aesthetic appeal of the local prostitutes, pay more for higher-class service.

My point is that a middle-aged guy looking for a relationship with a middle-aged woman won't suddenly go from zero-to-hero if he reduces his criteria for female physical beauty.
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Old 07-14-2013, 03:59 PM
 
51 posts, read 58,373 times
Reputation: 97
Quote:
Originally Posted by ohio_peasant View Post
We're following the OP's stipulation that by "settling" we mean strictly the reduction of demands of physical beauty, and not those of character, intelligence, values or interests.



While it's certainly reasonable to seek a partner whose life is already established and for whom the relationship is an enrichment rather than a palliative, we ought to be careful of extremes. Let's take a person who already has everything, who derives his/her pleasures and fascinations and contacts from a network of friends. Well, what need does this person have for a romantic relationship? Sex? Yes, but that's not a relationship.

At age 20 perhaps embarking on a relationship from scratch, excites passions that were not heretofore there. It creates - and meets! - new needs. But at 40 or 60, those needs are already there. What the new relationship does is to fulfill those unmet needs. If a woman has no such needs, what benefits do I provide for her, by entering into a relationship? If her "emotional and social needs" are already met, what then am I, besides a perfunctory appendage? I have no substantive role. No, the sort of woman whom I want to meet is one who most definitely DOES have a substantial and abiding emptiness in her life, which our putative new relationship aims to fill.

And this really is where I struggle so much.... Women who do have their proverbial stuff together, who are successful professionals and so forth, generally don't have the aforementioned burning need. Women who do have such need, are looking for a father for their children or a bailout for their debts.
This is beautiful. See, in spite of how great it sounds to say, “I don’t need you, I want you,” human beings ultimately want to be needed and wanted.
Yes, I personally am a multifaceted, capable and willing tool. I have a purpose. One of those purposes is to provide an environment for you and I to be happy.
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Old 07-14-2013, 04:02 PM
 
Location: Bronx
16,200 posts, read 23,033,564 times
Reputation: 8345
Quote:
Originally Posted by AT-AT28 View Post
I learned this the hard and long way with a failed 5 year relationship with a gal I was never attracted too, but the blindless by love, companionship and sex covered up my common sense until it was way too late.

Needless to say, I'll rather die mostly happy and alone then lower my standards again just to have companionship i'm unhappy about and having "grass is greener" throughts once again.
Im learning this now. I'm going to tell her I just want to be friends.
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Old 07-14-2013, 05:41 PM
 
5,347 posts, read 7,196,428 times
Reputation: 7158
A large percentage of males will never date or sleep with the women they truly desire so most are kinda forced to "lower their standards"
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Old 07-14-2013, 05:57 PM
FBJ
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,605 posts, read 58,992,680 times
Reputation: 9451
Quote:
Originally Posted by BradPiff View Post
A large percentage of males will never date or sleep with the women they truly desire so most are kinda forced to "lower their standards"

That's sad
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Old 07-14-2013, 06:03 PM
 
Location: The Emerald City
1,065 posts, read 1,801,361 times
Reputation: 1104
Quote:
Originally Posted by WestPhillyDude75 View Post
That's sad
Its the truth
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Old 07-14-2013, 06:09 PM
 
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
10,930 posts, read 11,717,447 times
Reputation: 13170
No, it usually means they have a bigger impression of themselves than is warranted.
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Old 07-14-2013, 06:27 PM
 
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
11,157 posts, read 13,995,357 times
Reputation: 14940
Quote:
Originally Posted by Frihed89 View Post
No, it usually means they have a bigger impression of themselves than is warranted.
I completely agree with this. Usually when a guy's standards are too high, his opinion of himself is too.
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Old 07-14-2013, 06:30 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,763 posts, read 52,838,486 times
Reputation: 25362
Quote:
Originally Posted by Frihed89 View Post
No, it usually means they have a bigger impression of themselves than is warranted.
Yeeeeep
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