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People try and do many different things in the course of their lives to see how it is. It's what makes us interesting and always growing. Some things are great - others are a poor execution of a good idea. After she had the same hair style for 5 years she just tried something new because she needed to.
Hmm, well, you could say what you want. I really don't do anything to make my BF happy. If he hates my hair, whatever. I am the one who is important, not him. He can like it or not, not my problem.
I would keep a smile on your face, don't make it a big issue out of it, but tell her that its okay but you liked how it was before. Then leave it up to her.
Hmm, well, you could say what you want. I really don't do anything to make my BF happy. If he hates my hair, whatever. I am the one who is important, not him. He can like it or not, not my problem.
I do appreciate long hair moreso than short hair, but with that being said, I did not get upset when an ex would shorten there hair, because I knew she would eventually let it grow back. Usually the women I dated would say "I just wanted to try something different." and That's definitely fine, try a new look to see if she likes the way it looks on her. Heck a couple of exes asked me to get it short, and I told them that it's her hair, you can do with it as you like, I'm not dating them because they only have long hair lol. Hell, when it's summer I can only imagine how rough it must be to deal with long hair when it's so damn humid outside.
I can't imagine such strong feelings over a few highlights.
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You say, "I think you were gorgeous the way you were, and I understand that sometimes you need to change things up a bit. If you like it, that's what's important. I don't think the new style looks bad at all, but I will always like your natural hair best."
My guess? She'll get tired of the maintenance and extra cost. That's basically why I cut my hair in the bathroom every few months - it's long, thick and curly, so when I make a mistake, it's not really noticeable. I've got plenty of gray in it, but I think it looks cool. My mother's hair turned pure white by the time she was in her early 60s, and she went gray very gracefully. I'm hoping my hair will take the same route.
I can't imagine such strong feelings over a few highlights.
Me either. Sounds like a closet control issue.
OP? I'm not being critical of you, I promise.
I just wonder if you do feel that you'd like to control what your GF does to her hair, what she wears, etc.
Maybe you should ask yourself why you're bothered by a change in her hair. She didn't shave her head bald. It sounds like it's an appropriate haircut and she just got some highlights... it's not a huge deal. And, of course she wants you to like it... you are her BF.
She wants you to find her attractive. And yeah, you can say "but, I already found her attractive with her old haircolor," and I would not argue that you did, for that's what you said earlier. Thing is, she wants you to find her attractive with this new hair, too. She took a fashion risk and it is natural that she would like for you to enjoy it as well.
I tend to ask my husband what he'd think if I did something new to my hair... BEFORE I do it. He is not the type to want to exert control over my hair, but if I'm toying with a few ideas, I'll run them past him and if he's really not into one of them and I was kind of ambivalent either way? I will likely skip it and go for one of the ones he thought were more likely to be flattering on me.
I got a PERM of all things... 2 years ago. He was VERY SUPPORTIVE, even though it was horrible. I'd not gotten a perm since I was in high school. Now, I remember why. HAhahahaha!
I am glad he's patient with haircolor, because I've been the type to change up haircolor every few months for YEARS now. It's just something I enjoy. Right now, my hair is auburn with purple highlights underneath it that peek, out, depending on which way my hair is moving. They were very dark purple at first, but they're sort of lavender now. I think that my next one is going to be a chocolate brown with very dark red underneath.
Roll with it. It's just hair.
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p.s. I forgot to tell you what you might try telling her.
Tell her what you think of the color itself. Is it really a bad color? I don't think it is. I think it's that you liked her old color better. Soo... tell her that the colors are nice. It's not a lie. I'm sure they are nice colors. Tell her you like her haircut. If she probes further, you can tell her that you like her natural color best of all, but she's beautiful to you no matter what color she chooses for her hair.
She'll appreciate you for it. She might even start running her haircolor ideas by you before she gets them. I know that is what got me to start asking my husband, back when we were dating. He always took a good look at the cut/color and gave me very polite, informative feedback. So, I trust his judgment.
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Guys! This is not about her changing her hair. She can do that if she wants. This is about her being upset that I did not say "I love it" I had no idea what these highlights/lowlights things were. When she came to the door with some blonde streaks in her hair I was very surprised. I think it was obvious the look on my face when I saw it. It was not what I was expecting. She still looks great. I know the highlights are not permanent or anything. It just wanted advice on what to say for her not to be upset about me telling her the truth instead of just saying "It looks great, I love it" which is not what I think.
She has had a stressful week. Whatever it will pass over but I just don't understand why she is upset that I told her the truth. I don't want to lie, say I love it and then have her redo the highlights in a few months.
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