Dating Someone Who's Not Your Type

[Amelie90]

Originally Posted by Bronxguyanese

I dont know why? I like black women too and I really do, however plenty of black women are not into me. I guess I'm not black enough for average black women especially since I'm heavily mixed. I don't know why they desire to be with those type of guys which do not really amount to nothing much in the long term. I find black women difficult to approach these days. But yes professional and well educated black men tend to be with white women, just like who well educated professional black women tend to be with white men. Its not the race issue of attraction its mainly similarities in education, income strata and work ethic that brings people of different races together.

I don't think this is the case. For the most part, educated and professional black women still date black men. I rarely come across any like myself who prefer to date interracially.

But going back to the topic of dating someone who's not your type, I went on a few dates with a professional, black guy last year. He had advanced degrees, a great job, carried himself well, was decently attractive and seemed like a really cool guy. He was divorced (no kids) and his ex-wife wasn't black. He did say that it was hard for him to meet women, and I got the feeling that he didn't date black women that often, but he gave me a shot for whatever reason. It was cool hanging out with him, but ultimately, I just didn't feel a romantic connection. But my point is that I'd be lying if I said that I never meet any professional black men who are interested in me because that's not true.

[Faith2187]

I've never had problems meeting or dating professional black men that were attractive and fit the look I was looking for. True they do tend to date white women, which is why I've said that virtually every black man I've dated this year has been one that mostly dates white women. They've all explained to me why this is, a lot of the time it isn't necessarily for status though as much as it is attraction, the perceived differences in white women versus black women with personality, approachability and ease of a relationship, and in a lot of cases the white women pursue and approach them as well. In fact I've known a few white women that had the nerve to try to approach the guy I was dating while I was dating him.

I only date men I'm attracted to and lately this is the type that I'm physically attracted to and this is also the type that pursues me and expresses interest in me. I admit that a lot of the time it's because they think I'm mixed so they have this weird perception about the way black women look and because they say I act white which I suppose makes it easier to date.

I used to attract thuggish men, years ago, but while they may make comments sexually to me because I have a big butt, or because they think I'm attractive they never come at me the way "my type" tends to. I'm thinking it's because of how I've started carrying myself recently in terms of dress, etc. In other words they know they don't have a chance because I'm not checking for thugs.

I do attract white men but I'm not attracted to most white men and just personally prefer black men. I have dated and I am attracted to Latino men as well as mixed men. And I don't struggle meeting my "type" or attracting my type but I also believe that it could be a location factor. I live on the east coast. I have lived down south and in Chicago, but when I was living in those areas I was in a relationship so I have no clue what the dating situation is for black women that prefer professional attractive black men. The friends I have that are into this type have dated professional black men that aren't as attractive but are good looking enough typically (in Chicago at least).