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But you did not ask her first whether or not she felt comfortable with that.
The first thing you did was to approach a hot female co-worker.
Yes that was foolish but I thought there was nothing wrong. Before we had the baby, she was very much into new sexual experiences. I thought this could be the ultimate experience.
Why? I just wanted to break the daily stress and give her something different. The baby is a lot of work and she does most of it.
If you were trying to do something for HER - then why didn't you ask HER what SHE wanted? I'm pretty sure her answer would not have been your coworker.
Why? I just wanted to break the daily stress and give her something different. The baby is a lot of work and she does most of it.
Again, the solution to "the baby is a lot of work and she does most of it, daily stress" etc. is a nanny, not a Playboy Playmate for mommy.
Why did you assume she wanted something "different"? Why didn't you discuss your feelings with her at all? It's a pretty good bet that what she wants is sleep. After getting caught up on that, she might have some of her own ideas for you. You should have asked her what she thought of the idea of letting your/her parents take the baby for a weekend, for starters, telling her you were concerned for her and thought she could use a break. From there, depending on her response, you could have let her know you'd like some quality 1-on-1 time with her if she might feel up to it. Build on that.
Again, it's not a boredom in bed problem, from what little you've told us. It's a baby-exhaustion problem. Those are two very different things. It's like trying to open a can of tuna with a stick of dynamite instead of with a simple can opener.
You picked out the other woman and then you were surprised that your SO didn't jump at the chance. Unless at some point she had expressed interest in this, why would you think she would go for it?
And just because your coworker sleeps around, how did you know that she would go for a threesome? Just a lucky guess.....or had you been telling her about your lack of a love life (how would your SO feel about you sharing that with this person)?
I'm thinking this woman has been on your radar for a while and perhaps bringing her in like this would mean you could sleep with her without cheating on your girlfriend....yeah, you're a real catch!
I don't know why I'm not a "real man" but anyway, I'll speak with her and apologise.
It's not a question of being a real man, it a question on how you are able to actually provide and work when you sound so clueless....I call BS, but you really don't see what went wrong...after all the posts, you honestly don't think you did anything bad...it's not like you took your co worker for a test drive, brought her home, and told your gf that you already warmed her up for her!
You should practice what you are going to say, I have a feeling that speaking to her will end up with you giving her a list of reasons why you did what you did. Your attempt to exonerate yourself, will only dig your hole deeper...
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