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That could be your problem. You have to be there long enough for people to notice you.
I message the women I'm interested in, they don't answer. What's the point of sticking around after that?
Like I said, it's the same women who were there a year ago, so they must not be trying very hard, aren't actually looking to date, holding out for prince charming, cheaters...etc, so I don't see the point of staying much longer.
Well POF is a cesspool, that is part of the problem. And a day or a week? Sounds like you're not trying.
Not that this is the right way, but when I do it (its been a few years, I haven't been looking) I start it up and refine my profile, update the pics, etc. Then start looking. I'll not write anyone probably for a few couple of weeks as I'll just be getting into the flow of reading profiles. I'll often read one and look at the answers to questions they give (if OKC) several times before deciding to write (making sure they're active) and then start working on a note. One of a week, maybe two, at most. And of course I'll respond to the few (there are more when you just start up again) messages I get from women. Maybe 1 in 3 I'll be interested in, so perhaps 1-2 a week will be interesting. Then do it for 4-6 weeks, have half a dozen first meetings, then take it down and see if anything comes from any of those... if not I take a break as there is no reason to keep on there and spend all that time when it is the same people. Come back 6 mos later or whatever and try again.
Didn't really see any difference when I was on OKC. Same thing, send message..no answer. Receive messages from unattractive and/or older women that I disregard.
6 meetings in 4-6 weeks?!?! Pffft. You must be extraordinarily good looking.
I message the women I'm interested in, they don't answer. What's the point of sticking around after that?
Like I said, it's the same women who were there a year ago, so they must not be trying very hard, aren't actually looking to date, holding out for prince charming, cheaters...etc, so I don't see the point of staying much longer.
This sounds like a case of a site that isn't getting much activity and has a lot of dead, abandoned accounts. Those women whose profiles have been up for a year or two are probably long gone, so you were messaging people who are no longer there. That's why you need to stay on there for a month or so, so that newcomers can see you, and people who only check their mailbox once or twice a week can have a chance to notice newcomers like you.
Treat dating like applying for a job and put your best foot forward. You're marketing yourself, so anything you can do to improve your chances is good. Now with that said, you don't want prosessional pics to come off as narcissistic, to avoid that you'll need to make sure you get photos taken that seem natural and casually clicked by a friend. If you like hiking, then get them taken during a hike, or bowling or whatever you like to do. If I was still dating and I saw a decent looking guy, that could type a coherent sentence, doing something I also enjoyed then I'd definitely respond. Good luck!
Treat dating like applying for a job and put your best foot forward. You're marketing yourself, so anything you can do to improve your chances is good.
You'd think this would be the obvious thing, right? Especially for people like the OP. I don't understand why people post selfies taken in their bathroom, and other weird stuff. If you're going to post a selfie, at least take it against a decent background. Making no effort is worse than making too much effort, I think.
This sounds like a case of a site that isn't getting much activity and has a lot of dead, abandoned accounts. Those women whose profiles have been up for a year or two are probably long gone, so you were messaging people who are no longer there. That's why you need to stay on there for a month or so, so that newcomers can see you, and people who only check their mailbox once or twice a week can have a chance to notice newcomers like you.
Nope, not the case. I only message women who have been active in the last week or so.
I message, they check out my profile, never hear from any of them, I delete it.
I think OLD, generally, is crap if you're a male. Obviously it works for some, but not me.
You'd think this would be the obvious thing, right? Especially for people like the OP. I don't understand why people post selfies taken in their bathroom, and other weird stuff. If you're going to post a selfie, at least take it against a decent background. Making no effort is worse than making too much effort, I think.
Yes, you are spot on. Like the pics with guys flexing and in the background there is a messy house / unmade bed. For a lot of women that = a lot of work for a guy who's into himself.
Yes, you are spot on. Like the pics with guys flexing and in the background there is a messy house / unmade bed. For a lot of women that = a lot of work for a guy who's into himself.
Exactly. I've seen women's selfies where the women was quite attractive, but her face got lost among the rumpled drapes and old furniture and TV in the background. If she'd smoothed out the drapes and stood directly in front of them, like in a photographer's studio, she would have looked very impressive. Someone who doesn't have the brains to figure out such a simple thing, or who can't be bothered to make the effort, is going to be a turnoff no matter how attractive they are. It says something about their character.
You'd think this would be the obvious thing, right? Especially for people like the OP. I don't understand why people post selfies taken in their bathroom, and other weird stuff. If you're going to post a selfie, at least take it against a decent background. Making no effort is worse than making too much effort, I think.
Yes! What works best for me is taking them in the dark in front of the light of a laptop. The lighting is good, and if you show up too white you can always use a filter later.
Exactly. I've seen women's selfies where the women was quite attractive, but her face got lost among the rumpled drapes and old furniture and TV in the background. If she'd smoothed out the drapes and stood directly in front of them, like in a photographer's studio, she would have looked very impressive. Someone who doesn't have the brains to figure out such a simple thing, or who can't be bothered to make the effort, is going to be a turnoff no matter how attractive they are. It says something about their character.
As if men care about stuff like this. Women on OLD get inundated with messages.
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