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Location: Sodo Sopa at The Villas above Kenny' s House.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TracySam
But you are forgetting that everything is in the CONTEXT of the relationship between the two parties. In my case, it's two of us who know each other very well, we've established our patterns of communication & relating over 20 years (we were friends before being in a relationship). the person in McDonald's does not know me and I don't know her. Just like with the flirting stuff: if it's a total stranger, you have to figure out each other's patterns of communication. In business situations or customer/cashier situations, you should be clear and direct. People who are very close to each other communicate in 10,000 other ways, because they know each other well. In my situation, over time, I learned that his reaction to "direct" when it came to household responsibilities was to turn into a 13 year old treating me like a nagging mom. That reaction caused me to be less direct about it. But the problem is that now he can choose to ignore my request and claim to have not gotten it. so when you really look at it, HE was the one who manipulated ME. He reacted to direct requests with sullenness and arguments, leading me to be indirect and "gentle" so that he can now claim he did not understand the message. In reality, he 100% knew what I was saying when I said the trash smelled.
Thank you ..thank you for putting it into words. I'm currently going through a Very painful but necessary separation. Your example mimics one of my biggest complaints with our relationship. It wasn't that I necessarily liked dancing around an issue but he set it up to where that was the only way to air my grievance without him blowing up. I was just explaining it earlier to a friend. I used to secretly think "you want the truth?, you can't handle the truth. But reality was more like he didn't want the truth, knew exactly how to behave to stop you from giving it and when you would try in various indirect ways he would purposefully ignore or either twist it into his failure being a result of my inability to communicate at his level. It was danged if i did and danged if didn't.
Disclaimer: I do not use dang in any sense but our puritanical forum. And no Joe Dirt is not the man in question.
B) He noticed but (he) is married or in a relationship
C) He's gay
D) He's just plain dumb and naive!
Everyone has missed another possibility.....that she gave off all the signs of being a crazy bit*h and the manager might be very worried that if he gave into her advances he'd wind up regretting it.....she could wind up a Glenn Close bunny boiler or showing up at his work/house all the time, thinking they were now bonded, etc. after and he wanted none of that.
There's also the chance she was dog ugly or out of shape and did nothing for the dude.
And quite seriously, what normal woman would wear a nightie under a long coat and go to a lumber store.....I would think any guy with a fairly reasonable mind would steer clear of someone like that seeing it as very desperate & figuring it might wind up being way to much trouble after the fact.
Crazy in the head, crazy in bed has some validity but not when the person is truly crazy which might be the case with this woman.
Everyone has missed another possibility.....that she gave off all the signs of being a crazy bit*h and the manager might be very worried that if he gave into her advances he'd wind up regretting it.....she could wind up a Glenn Close bunny boiler or showing up at his work/house all the time, thinking they were now bonded, etc. after and he wanted none of that.
There's also the chance she was dog ugly or out of shape and did nothing for the dude.
And quite seriously, what normal woman would wear a nightie under a long coat and go to a lumber store.....I would think any guy with a fairly reasonable mind would steer clear of someone like that seeing it as very desperate & figuring it might wind up being way to much trouble after the fact.
Crazy in the head, crazy in bed has some validity but not when the person is truly crazy which might be the case with this woman.
Yeah, I think she was crazy. It appeared like she was recently divorced and was in desperate need of a man.
I think when you have a GF it's different. If you sneeze and a woman says bless you, your girlfriend sees that as flirting.
This applies for vice versa of course, but I think in relationships people tend to either be overprotective or not give a sh*t, an in between usually isn't there
Good point. She thinks I flirt, too. All I do is be nice and talk to people. Not try'n to get in their pants.
Plus age makes a difference. At 45, I'm blunt and don't play games. lol
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