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Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,794,567 times
Reputation: 41397
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheLessons
I've had to think about a reply for this comment, McBain.
I just can't.
You've astonished me with your complete lack of caring.
Honestly I agree with McBain outside of the stillbirth situation. Dude was perfectly clear on his stances, she is not free of responsibility for her "waste of 14 years" in the least.
If she hadn't gotten pregnant and just continued to be in a "relationship" with the OP - then, no, I wouldn't feel bad for her. What I feel bad about is that this woman got pregnant, he pressured her to get an abortion, told her that the "rules" would remain the same even if they had a child together, told her that he thought the baby wasn't his, and is now making this whole thing all about him when he doesn't even seem that sorry about the loss of their child.
And life changing traumatic event really doesn't even cover it. I don't think any mother ever really gets over losing a child. I know that this is my biggest fear.
She's right about the OP. He's cold hearted. But she's known that all along. I don't know why she's surprised at his attituded. All he really cares about is sex.
She's right about the OP. He's cold hearted. But she's known that all along. I don't know why she's surprised at his attituded. All he really cares about is sex.
Why do you think she's surprised? She told the OP he was probably glad she lost the baby. She doesn't sound shocked by his apathy at all to me.
OP, this relationship is over unless you're willing to take it to a more committed level. Your GF may have been okay with your arrangement when she was in her 20s but now that's she's 33 her biological clock is ticking and this relationship obviously isn't working for her anymore. There's a possibility she even got pregnant on purpose hoping to use it to force you to commit to her; maybe the failure of that plan is fueling some of her anger towards you.
If you know you don't want kids there's no reason for you to not go and get a vasectomy or else this will probably happen again in the future with another woman. Be aware that there are few women older than 30 that will be happy with this type of non-committed, don't live together, free to have sex with other people relationship for very long so your available pool of options will shrink the older you get.
I don't know you, and I could be getting you all wrong - BUT! You might want to consider that the pregnancy matured her. Perhaps the idea of a stable family is now appealing to her. That is something you have confirmed you are incapable of giving her.
You never supported her, right? Not emotionally and not financially, right?
As I said, I don't know you, but you are coming across like a little boy that has suddenly lost his favorite ball and finds himself desperate to suddenly retrieve it and put it back in his favorite box for it.
Don't be so selfish. She may be in no condition to be alone, but she is even more likely to be in no condition to continue to associate with you.
Even a selfish man would be able to accept that fact. A selfish little boy - I'm not so sure.
Best wishes to you anyway though. Seriously.
Even better wishes for her! She has made the first step to a happier and more fulfilling life!
I'm assuming I'm leaving for good so what's the point of making it even more hurtful?
You are a cowardly, uncaring, and selfish man.
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