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If he moves away from the bad influences, he will be better.
He has so much potential.
He behaved that way because xxxx.
He will be perfect if I can change x, x and x about him.
Meanwhile, somewhere out there is a guy who doesn't need to be changed. Someone you don't have to rescue. Someone that you can respect exactly as he is right now.
Edit: by the way, when you get SERIOUS with your threats, that's when he will start hiding the behavior and sneaking around to behave that way.
Do you really want to be the girl who's attached her life to a felon? This will cross itself over to you by association and affect your life too. What nice boy is ever going to want to get involved with you knowing of this past relationship? It doesn't matter that he's downplaying the seriousness to you. He's doing a sales job to gain your acceptance. One mistake should have set him right, anything after that was his disregard for the law and rules in general. How many girls are in prison because they were too weak to disregard that bad boy they thought loved them?
I'm not saying he can't change but he has already affected his life, and potentially yours, with a felony conviction. At the very least I would recommend continuing to date other people and not make any sort of commitment even an emotional one to him for a good long time. There are plenty of guys who don't have this hanging over them. Don't sell yourself short.
I don't suppose you will listen, but here goes. His parents divorce is no excuse for his behavior. Millions of kid's parents get divorced and they don't commit crimes and use drugs. These things show him to be of weak character. Could he turn his life around? Sure, but he needs to put a lot more time in. He has already demonstrated that he is a parole violator. Even if he does not get caught, he is still a liar.
You should be totally honest with your parents. What would be the downside of doing this? You should take advantage of their judgement to protect you from yourself.
Why are you so needy that you feel you only deserve a man like this?
Yep. In fact, OP, your hesitance to tell your parents SHOULD BE a huge red flag. Shouldn't you be able to talk about your BF with people WITHOUT fear "finding out" stuff?
So now you've broken two of your own deal breakers.
I don't suppose you will listen, but here goes. His parents divorce is no excuse for his behavior. Millions of kid's parents get divorced and they don't commit crimes and use drugs. These things show him to be of weak character. Could he turn his life around? Sure, but he needs to put a lot more time in. He has already demonstrated that he is a parole violator. Even if he does not get caught, he is still a liar.
You should be totally honest with your parents. What would be the downside of doing this? You should take advantage of their judgement to protect you from yourself.
Why are you so needy that you feel you only deserve a man like this?
Honestly, everyone has a past and some people past are much worse than others which was why I gave it a shot. He also told me about his past when we first began to talk rather than keeping it a secret. He told me with sincerity
Yep. In fact, OP, your hesitance to tell your parents SHOULD BE a huge red flag. Shouldn't you be able to talk about your BF with people WITHOUT fear "finding out" stuff?
So now you've broken two of your own deal breakers.
I thought about this, I should not have to hide anything.
Do you really want to be the girl who's attached her life to a felon? This will cross itself over to you by association and affect your life too. What nice boy is ever going to want to get involved with you knowing of this past relationship? It doesn't matter that he's downplaying the seriousness to you. He's doing a sales job to gain your acceptance. One mistake should have set him right, anything after that was his disregard for the law and rules in general. How many girls are in prison because they were too weak to disregard that bad boy they thought loved them?
I'm not saying he can't change but he has already affected his life, and potentially yours, with a felony conviction. At the very least I would recommend continuing to date other people and not make any sort of commitment even an emotional one to him for a good long time. There are plenty of guys who don't have this hanging over them. Don't sell yourself short.
I have waited too late to start dating other people. He and I is head over heels now and I allowed myself to look at all angles of this situation
Honestly, everyone has a past and some people past are much worse than others which was why I gave it a shot. He also told me about his past when we first began to talk rather than keeping it a secret. He told me with sincerity
He must be pretty good looking then.
I'm sure he didn't have his criminal record in his POF profile.
As he was telling you about each charge and conviction, at no point did you hear your inner voice warning you?
I'm sure he didn't have his criminal record in his POF profile.
As he was telling you about each charge and conviction, at no point did you hear your inner voice warning you?
Yes I did. My first thought was has he changed or will he do something that would put me in harms way. So far he has been attending church with me and working. I hope this remains
Yes I did. My first thought was has he changed or will he do something that would put me in harms way. So far he has been attending church with me and working. I hope this remains
Whether or not he wants to truly change and not go back to his old ways is up to him.
He has to do this for himself.
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