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That kind of behavior is really irritating and kind of a mind game. Just say what you feel.
Well, in those "old" days we keep referring back to, when it wasn't ok for women to ask men out, the song and dance she refers to ("Oh, you like the band that's going to be in town next week? I LOVE them! I've always wanted to go to one of their concerts! (eyelash bat, smile, expectative hopeful stare) ) is what women did instead of outright blurting "Invite me to the damn concert, for god's sake!" Nowadays, a woman would say, "Oh, you like the Rolling Trolls? I LOVE them! Wanna go to the concert together?"
And according to some of the men here, they'd turn her down, because they don't like women who make the first move and ask them out.
But how? How does some customer put through a "complaint" at a store that some other customer asked her out on a date? RBCCL's post was hilarious (I mean it really was...OMG) BUT she made a point. How in the nine frozen hells could that ever happen? You say you've had "complaints" put through about you, TJ. Okay...you mean...complaints in a store with you as a customer, from another customer? How did that happen?
All I know is that I'm in a store, and then a manager comes up to me saying "There have been some complaints about you" often followed by "You need to leave". (after a few words)
This has also happened in a few other establishments besides stores. (Every once in a while I might add. Not an everyday thing).
But I had never been complained about by a woman for talking to her.
There is a lot more to that story that I know about, but that could really derail the topic even further. I could tell you some really sick things that have been done to me in different places, too.
Last edited by TJenkins602; 12-10-2016 at 03:22 PM..
Reason: For clarity
It would be wonderful if women did just make it obvious they were interested. Given how much **** women deal with from men on a day-to-day basis, I assume that 99% of the time, they don't want to be bothered and if they ask me a simple question or make a casual statement, I'm going to respond in kind. I'm not going to assume they're flirting, or whatever.
I must have mentioned this on this thread, but my husband says this VERY thing! Women may not approach in the same way. We may be more subtle. Well...okay...that's how we roll. (Not every last woman, everyone is different, blah blah, have to do some preventive anti-knicker-twisting here.) But so many men, from what I've heard (directly from those men, I mean), just don't pick up on those particular comments and approaches and literally do think the woman accidentally just dropped something or legitimately does need to know the time even though she's holding her own phone or whatever. Or pick up on what the hell "Oh, you're going to X this weekend? I LOVE X...I always wanted to go, but I'd rather go with someone who knows the venue so I don't get lost (stare stare, blink blink, big smile)" means.
My husband has said that looking back, he could almost certainly have gone out with many, many girls who were "friends" in high school, but he didn't "get it."
I know a man's typical answer to this is, "Well then, women should be more direct...you know, they should act just like men" but I thought the reason you guys liked us was that we AREN'T men. And I'm sorry...but you can't really order up the perfect woman...she looks amazingly feminine and gorgeous, she sounds and acts amazingly feminine and gorgeous, yet somehow she has just this one extremely aggressive trait, she randomly walks up to guys and announces clearly, "I feel attracted looking at you. Let's go out on a date." Life just doesn't really work that way.
So yeah, each of us has to reach across the aisle on this one and try to understand one another, while still allowing the other to be him/herself.
I'm taking a friend of mine to see Rogue One next weekend. I picked up on that clue.
Well, in those "old" days we keep referring back to, when it wasn't ok for women to ask men out, the song and dance she refers to ("Oh, you like the band that's going to be in town next week? I LOVE them! I've always wanted to go to one of their concerts! (eyelash bat, smile, expectative hopeful stare) ) is what women did instead of outright blurting "Invite me to the damn concert, for god's sake!" Nowadays, a woman would say, "Oh, you like the Rolling Trolls? I LOVE them! Wanna go to the concert together?"
And according to some of the men here, they'd turn her down, because they don't like women who make the first move and ask them out.
That's an appropriate way to show interest. That makes interest more obvious that giving weird, too-subtle cues and expecting someone to know what those mean.
Only a moron would say something like that. Obviously I don't mean being that forward. There's a middle ground between saying I want to feel you up and asking what the time is and expecting the guy to know that she's showing interest. Just say something like "Hi, I saw you across the room and wanted to talk," or something else along that line.
Duh, if she saw you across a room and came over to talk, then she obviously wanted to come over and talk.
It would be wonderful if women did just make it obvious they were interested. Given how much **** women deal with from men on a day-to-day basis, I assume that 99% of the time, they don't want to be bothered and if they ask me a simple question or make a casual statement, I'm going to respond in kind. I'm not going to assume they're flirting, or whatever.
It doesn't mean you assume she's into you, necessarily. She may just be being friendly. (I've been known to compliment a stranger's tie, simply because I appreciate artistic ties.) What it means is that it's an opening to scope out her intentions a little, by coming back with some chat, and gauging her response. If she says, "It's been nice talking to you. I need to continue on, on my errands for the day", you let it go. If she stays to chat a bit, you might offer her a coffee, or tell her you'd be interested in continuing the convo over coffee at a later date.
Well, in those "old" days we keep referring back to, when it wasn't ok for women to ask men out, the song and dance she refers to ("Oh, you like the band that's going to be in town next week? I LOVE them! I've always wanted to go to one of their concerts! (eyelash bat, smile, expectative hopeful stare) ) is what women did instead of outright blurting "Invite me to the damn concert, for god's sake!" Nowadays, a woman would say, "Oh, you like Rolling Trolls? I LOVE them! Wanna go to the concert together?"
And according to some of the men here, they'd turn her down, because they don't like women who make the first move and ask them out.
Yeah that's a mystery to me to be honest my love and can't fathom it out as to why they would turn them down for that reason , Yes naturally if you're not attracted or already involved with someone then I could understand it but when she's attractive and one you would actually chase and ask out yourself its even more confusing! lol.
Each to their own of course but me personally and pretty much every bloke I know absolutely LOVE IT!!!!! When a lady initiates conversation/approaches and so on .
It would be wonderful if women did just make it obvious they were interested. Given how much **** women deal with from men on a day-to-day basis, I assume that 99% of the time, they don't want to be bothered and if they ask me a simple question or make a casual statement, I'm going to respond in kind. I'm not going to assume they're flirting, or whatever.
That's what I started doing lol. If a woman asks me question I'll respond but I'm walking away afterwards.
That's an appropriate way to show interest. That makes interest more obvious that giving weird, too-subtle cues and expecting someone to know what those mean.
And to your last sentence, those men are idiots.
Too subtle *for you* does not equal weird.
Maybe she's not too subtle, maybe you're too coarse.
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Or pick up on what the hell "Oh, you're going to X this weekend? I LOVE X...I always wanted to go, but I'd rather go with someone who knows the venue so I don't get lost (stare stare, blink blink, big smile)" means.
And I'm sorry...but you can't really order up the perfect woman...she looks amazingly feminine and gorgeous, she sounds and acts amazingly feminine and gorgeous, yet somehow she has just this one extremely aggressive trait, she randomly walks up to guys and announces clearly, "I feel attracted looking at you. Let's go out on a date." Life just doesn't really work that way.
.
