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Location: In the cold, dark wasteland of eternity...
926 posts, read 674,115 times
Reputation: 1525
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonic_Spork
I dunno, a friend got one of those super realistic like "real skin" ones, and brought it to a party (we were bopping each other on the head with it and giggling like idiots) and I actually think it would be a pretty sound stand in for the real deal.
Yeah, but Sonic, a sex toy - no matter how much it has a 'real flesh-like feel' to it - will NEVER be a sound stand-in for the real thing that is attached to a warm body of a guy who has a mouth, tongue, chest, abdomen, butt and hands with which to facilitate a sexually and sensuously intimate experience! Surely you must agree with that, right?!
I mean, sure, in a pinch, it might satisfy her temporarily when she really wants 'it', but I definitely don't see it satisfying her for the long haul - or, maybe it would! Who knows?!
Yeah, but Sonic, a sex toy - no matter how much it has a 'real flesh-like feel' to it - will NEVER be a sound stand-in for the real thing that is attached to a warm body of a guy who has a mouth, tongue, chest, abdomen, butt and hands with which to facilitate a sexually and sensuously intimate experience! Surely you must agree with that, right?!
I mean, sure, in a pinch, it might satisfy her temporarily when she really wants 'it', but I definitely don't see it satisfying her for the long haul - or, maybe it would! Who knows?!
Well, I guess you could say the same thing if your partner became a quadraplegic or had some kind of accident...of COURSE alternatives aren't as good...but you also realize a guy is more than just his d**k, right? It all comes down to what you will or won't accept - sounds like no d**k and you're outta there?
Location: In the cold, dark wasteland of eternity...
926 posts, read 674,115 times
Reputation: 1525
Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63
Well, I guess you could say the same thing if your partner became a quadraplegic or had some kind of accident...of COURSE alternatives aren't as good...but you also realize a guy is more than just his d**k, right? It all comes down to what you will or won't accept - sounds like no d**k and you're outta there?
Why do you always take everything I say and twist it into the extreme?
The OP's husband/wife is NOT a quad, he/she did NOT have an accident or an illness or some kind of disease or anything else that is preventing their plumbing from functioning properly. He came out as being a transgendered person. He CHOSE that path, which is a LOT different than him having some sort of accident or disease that was beyond his control.
Yeah renee, a guy is more than his plumbing. But for me, in this particular case, I would abandon ship - not because he will no longer use his penis for what it was meant for, but because of the deception and because if I married a man, it's because I wanted to be with a man, and ALL that it entails.
I dunno, a friend got one of those super realistic like "real skin" ones, and brought it to a party (we were bopping each other on the head with it and giggling like idiots) and I actually think it would be a pretty sound stand in for the real deal.
Um... gee. I'm not sure their sex life should be a part of the topic, unless she wants to discuss it. I would hope that her husband would be giving enough to allow for a stand in if performance was in question. Considering everything his wife as adjusted too, it would seem to be a small thing to ask of him, imho.
Why do you always take everything I say and twist it into the extreme?
The OP's husband/wife is NOT a quad, he/she did NOT have an accident or an illness or some kind of disease or anything else that is preventing their plumbing from functioning properly. He came out as being a transgendered person. He CHOSE that path, which is a LOT different than him having some sort of accident or disease that was beyond his control.
Yeah renee, a guy is more than his plumbing. But for me, in this particular case, I would abandon ship - not because he will no longer use his penis for what it was meant for, but because of the deception and because if I married a man, it's because I wanted to be with a man, and ALL that it entails.
That is all.
Well, there are arguments about whether people choose these kinds of things or not, but I don't want to get into all that. I have an idea of where the OP probably stands on the matter, though.
To speak to what we were talking about before, no a toy is not the same and not attached to the whole human...unless it totally IS attached to them. Like with a harness? Yeah.
But in all honesty from what we've been given so far, OP's spouse might not go for that. Or might prefer that she (OP) be the "top" instead. None of our business anyhow!
OP wasn't really here to complain about the D or lack thereof, as far as I know. She was here complaining about the behaviors. Like this transition seems to have been a weird way for her spouse to BECOME her...which is odd, and kinda...creepy. Sorry. I hate that word. But it would weird me out. Said spouse needs to find another woman to be her role model.
Hey, OP. I wonder something. What do you think would happen if the two of you were in bed watching TV or something one night, and you came across an actress (who doesn't look like you!) and said, "My god she is gorgeous. I wish I could look like her. Don't you think she's amazing?" Wouldn't it be something if your spouse's fixation could be...shifted? I wonder if that is possible?
Also bear in mind that different people have VERY different needs, desires, and preferences as relate to fulfilling sexual intimacy. Don't assume that what you consider to be essential in a satisfying sexual relationship is what everyone feels is essential. It's wholly possible that the OP's partner is completely able to provide satisfaction in this department to the OP's standards (and really isn't anybody else's business, either way).
The OP's husband/wife is NOT a quad, he/she did NOT have an accident or an illness or some kind of disease or anything else that is preventing their plumbing from functioning properly. He came out as being a transgendered person. He CHOSE that path, which is a LOT different than him having some sort of accident or disease that was beyond his control.
This is a pretty controversial statement, though.
It's right up there with "But people choose to be gay! They could just choose not to!"
I also agree that it seems like the real struggles here are due to the OP's partner's behavior since coming out...generally obnoxious behavior that would be unacceptable in any partner of any identity of orientation. But since they're being attributed as a kind of "growing pains" associated with adjusting to a new life, navigating them is requiring looking at them through a slightly different lens, for the OP, as opposed to "Wow, my spouse is really just being a jerk."
Location: In the cold, dark wasteland of eternity...
926 posts, read 674,115 times
Reputation: 1525
Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa
Also bear in mind that different people have VERY different needs, desires, and preferences as relate to fulfilling sexual intimacy. Don't assume that what you consider to be essential in a satisfying sexual relationship is what everyone feels is essential. It's wholly possible that the OP's partner is completely able to provide satisfaction in this department to the OP's standards (and really isn't anybody else's business, either way).
I agree with everything you said. I was addressing Sonic's post regarding how a sex toy could be a good 'stand-in' for the real deal. Her post didn't say anything about the OP's spouse physically being able to satisfy the OP in that regard. (and you're right, the OP's sex life is none of anyone's business!)
Yeah, but Sonic, a sex toy - no matter how much it has a 'real flesh-like feel' to it - will NEVER be a sound stand-in for the real thing that is attached to a warm body of a guy who has a mouth, tongue, chest, abdomen, butt and hands with which to facilitate a sexually and sensuously intimate experience! Surely you must agree with that, right?!
I mean, sure, in a pinch, it might satisfy her temporarily when she really wants 'it', but I definitely don't see it satisfying her for the long haul - or, maybe it would! Who knows?!
Quote:
Originally Posted by AprilFlowers17
Why do you always take everything I say and twist it into the extreme?
The OP's husband/wife is NOT a quad, he/she did NOT have an accident or an illness or some kind of disease or anything else that is preventing their plumbing from functioning properly. He came out as being a transgendered person. He CHOSE that path, which is a LOT different than him having some sort of accident or disease that was beyond his control.
Yeah renee, a guy is more than his plumbing. But for me, in this particular case, I would abandon ship - not because he will no longer use his penis for what it was meant for, but because of the deception and because if I married a man, it's because I wanted to be with a man, and ALL that it entails.
That is all.
Sorry - just going by your emphatic and graphic words that no toy could ever stand in for the real thing - that was the entire focus of your post so yes, it sounded like that was what was most important. You didn't mention that this was more important because he chose that path - you only talked about his physical parts.
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Who knows?!
