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The problem with sex is that it can be...and often IS, a one-sided activity.
wait what? Having sex is good exercise for anyone having sex.
Ok I can agree with you it can be one-sided but I have to totally veer off from it being a one-sided activity often as you say. I think most sexual encounters are mutually enjoyable and beneficial most of the time for most people. Again though, not taking away from those instances where it is one-sided.
wait what? Having sex is good exercise for anyone having sex.
Wait, what? Do you think that sex is "good exercise" for those who have no interest in sex...OR 'exercise' through sex?
Sex is NOT the same for EVERYONE.
Quote:
Ok I can agree with you it can be one-sided but I have to totally veer off from it being a one-sided activity often as you say. I think most sexual encounters are mutually enjoyable and beneficial most of the time for most people. Again though, not taking away from those instances where it is one-sided.
That's just it. EACH sexual encounter is NOT always 'enjoyable' for BOTH people. For instance, it's been said that 3/4's of women do NOT have the 'Big O' during sex.
I think there was some survey a few years ago that pointed out, that there were over 200 reasons that people can have sex at ANY point. Sex for revenge (not necessarily having an orgasm during the encounter)...sex to put someone to sleep...sex out of anger...or to put a 'notch' on someone's belt...
Seems like MOST reasons for having sex are personal...and even often selfish...and have nothing to do with the other person.
In fact, I can't think of a single time when I've ever heard someone say, "I want to have sex with this person because I want to 'connect' with them..."
People don't generally walk into a law office and tell the lawyer they want a divorce because of "irreconcilable differences." That lawyer often acts as a 'counselor'. A legal counselor, yes. But the petitioner usually has a 'story' to tell the attorney, and the attorney will listen...and determine that it's best if they file using irreconcilable differences as the legal 'reason'.
Yes, because people trust lawyers with the truth more than marriage counselors.....
Wait, what? Do you think that sex is "good exercise" for those who have no interest in sex...OR 'exercise' through sex?
Sex is NOT the same for EVERYONE.
That's just it. EACH sexual encounter is NOT always 'enjoyable' for BOTH people. For instance, it's been said that 3/4's of women do NOT have the 'Big O' during sex.
I think there was some survey a few years ago that pointed out, that there were over 200 reasons that people can have sex at ANY point. Sex for revenge (not necessarily having an orgasm during the encounter)...sex to put someone to sleep...sex out of anger...or to put a 'notch' on someone's belt...
Seems like MOST reasons for having sex are personal...and even often selfish...and have nothing to do with the other person.
In fact, I can't think of a single time when I've ever heard someone say, "I want to have sex with this person because I want to 'connect' with them..."
There seems to be a lot of common events that you have never heard of. Maybe get out more often?
Women not reaching climax is largely a function of 2 issues - ignorance of human sexuality on the part of both men and women, and the rampant sexual repression of women by their religion - both of which are related. A woman brought up to believe sex is dirty or sinful will still have that idea in her head long after the marriage that religion thinks must occur before bothering to be educated about sex. Go figger.
And what group doggedly works to keep sex ed out of schools or to sanitize it to the point where it is useless? Still religion. And what group has the highest incidence of divorce, infidelity, and STD's in the US?
Still religion.
I have a decade of being invited into high school sex ed classes. It turns out that 16 year olds will not ask questions about sex - so I had them ask their questions on index cards to remain anonymous. The first day I did that, I went home and cried.
Sample questions from mainly Christian kids:
"My sister says I can't get pregnant if I drink a shot of alcohol right after sex. Is that true?"
"If I jump up and down on one leg for 5 minutes, I won't get pregnant, right?"
"My mom says condoms never work. Is that true?"
"I can get gonorrhea from the toilet, can't I?"
Now we have Christian girls insisting their boyfriends only have anal sex - since she has to be a virgin when she marries.....
Wait, what? Do you think that sex is "good exercise" for those who have no interest in sex...OR 'exercise' through sex?
Sex is NOT the same for EVERYONE.
That's just it. EACH sexual encounter is NOT always 'enjoyable' for BOTH people. For instance, it's been said that 3/4's of women do NOT have the 'Big O' during sex.
I think there was some survey a few years ago that pointed out, that there were over 200 reasons that people can have sex at ANY point. Sex for revenge (not necessarily having an orgasm during the encounter)...sex to put someone to sleep...sex out of anger...or to put a 'notch' on someone's belt...
Seems like MOST reasons for having sex are personal...and even often selfish...and have nothing to do with the other person.
In fact, I can't think of a single time when I've ever heard someone say, "I want to have sex with this person because I want to 'connect' with them..."
Again I don't want to dismiss the notion that sex can be one-sided and I certainly am a strong advocate that NO means NO. That said, I can't imagine that most people having sex are not enjoying it most of the time. It should be something consensual always.
There seems to be a lot of common events that you have never heard of. Maybe get out more often?
Women not reaching climax is largely a function of 2 issues - ignorance of human sexuality on the part of both men and women, and the rampant sexual repression of women by their religion - both of which are related. A woman brought up to believe sex is dirty or sinful will still have that idea in her head long after the marriage that religion thinks must occur before bothering to be educated about sex. Go figger.
And what group doggedly works to keep sex ed out of schools or to sanitize it to the point where it is useless? Still religion. And what group has the highest incidence of divorce, infidelity, and STD's in the US?
Still religion.
I have a decade of being invited into high school sex ed classes. It turns out that 16 year olds will not ask questions about sex - so I had them ask their questions on index cards to remain anonymous. The first day I did that, I went home and cried.
Sample questions from mainly Christian kids:
"My sister says I can't get pregnant if I drink a shot of alcohol right after sex. Is that true?"
"If I jump up and down on one leg for 5 minutes, I won't get pregnant, right?"
"My mom says condoms never work. Is that true?"
"I can get gonorrhea from the toilet, can't I?"
Now we have Christian girls insisting their boyfriends only have anal sex - since she has to be a virgin when she marries.....
Religion has much to answer for.
In our school system, at various times, sex ed was either an opt-in or an opt-out program. Steady was the rule that teachers could not answer student questions except by having students write their questions on an index card, which would then be reviewed by the teacher before the next class. There were -- literally -- scripts for answers to common questions that the teacher had to use. And one script that had to be read verbatim: "I'm sorry. I'm not allowed to answer that question. You should go home to discuss your question with your parents". One of the questions that showed just how dumb kids can be about sex was: "Is it true that you can grow sperm in an aquarium?"
Sex should always be responsible, but religion has certainly imprisoned the minds of many people when it comes to sex.
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