Men and Women retiring alone to a new city/state -- where will you go and why? (55, physically)

[StealthRabbit]

Originally Posted by artangel

...Still don't know where i will wind up. Thanks for your comments/suggestions/empathy. i will check out Co again as mentioned. ....

For a Wonderful Colorado adventure, (Loveland) you have 11 months more to plan. (I'd book early)
Sculpture in the Park Show | Loveland High Plains Arts Council

We have an annual bluegrass festival and IceCream socil the Sat night of event (2nd weekend in Aug). 3rd weekend is a great 12 hr gospel bluegrass at Masonville (nearby). I spend the week in between up in the mtns near Estes Park (where I grew up).YMCA has summer music camps, and plenty to do in RM National Park.

I'm glad you found relief, and friends, and had a successful visit home.

Best wishes on the continuation of the journey.

[artangel]

So, my friends.....have been over-whelmed in just one short week. So many calls for help and attention...so many out there hurting and desperate and alone. have heard from a lot of my friends who needed a listening ear, a shoulder, a hug. Wow! It worries me that there are so many of us single gals out there struggling, near to the desperate point....

Went to dentist today. Still reeling in shock. he told me I need $12,000 worth of work done. Don't know what to do. i could use my savings......am not desperate like some, so don't qualify for help, even tho' living on $900 to $1,000 a month and not really covering expenses and trying to cut everything I can.............Whew. This is a tough one. First an increase in health insurance to $850 a month , then this. If I use what I've saved, then what? Oh, boy. I came home, hugged my dog, cried a bit, then fell asleep for a couple hours, took a walk, read a book.....actually didn't want to think about it. Will try to start investigating options tommorrow.

Thanks for listening. My optimism rapidly being drained..........

[StealthRabbit]

Originally Posted by artangel

...Went to dentist today. Still reeling in shock. he told me I need $12,000 worth of work done. Don't know what to do. i could use my savings......... Will try to start investigating options tommorrow.

Thanks for listening. My optimism rapidly being drained..........

Time for a medivacation to Thailand. Winter is a good time to go.
Having dental work done in Thailand - Lonely Planet travel forum

One of my best friends lost a spouse of 55 yrs yesterday, It has been a long 24 hrs, But I was able to fix the family up with Funeral.coop Things are looking up already. (Significant improvement in a day, BUT the lonely times ahead will be plenty). So.... We need to avail ourselves to others, cuz that's what really counts.

[loveautumn]

that is the truth! If everyone just helped somebody out once a day, week, month...we would live in a kinder and not so lonely world. Everybody needs help, most are afraid to admit it or ask for it. I'm sure it makes your trip better knowing you helped someone before you left!

[artangel]

Thanks again for your replies! Stealth, so sorry about your friend. I did go onto site you very kindly provided and read all responses etc. Honestly? Kinda unlikely option for me...I have a hard time traveling and have never been out of USA....have a lot of trepidation about that, plus I am a gigantic "chicken" when it comes to dental work, so would probably not work for me. However, at this point I won't rule anything out! Mexico is closer, of course, and I even know a friend whose hubby just had work done there. Same worries....but....???? Who knows? (I'm really in awe of those adventurous souls who do so, however!!!)I have to get 2nd opinion, check dental schools etc. I don't qualify for any free clinics as I own my house and have a little savings. Do I exhaust that savings on dental work? Keep it for cushion and ignore teeth? I had hoped at one point to sell house and move to smaller place to gain a little more cushion.....looks like I'll certainly need that, if it's possible to achieve those results.

Haven't been able to work for a decade but can't get disability. I live on the amt of alimony my ex was willing to give me....and that's not a huge amount, believe me. Without my "assets" I would be at or below poverty level, if you first take off my current health insurance costs......so...drop health insurance? Scary thought. May be necessary. Waiting for Nov results in election to sort out options available..... At least I have some money.......many others have absolutely none. But once it's gone, well, no safety net.

Thanks for letting me vent. it's scary being alone and making these large decisions. Plus having little hope about the future, because many days it sure seems like it can only get worse............Chronic illness, abuse....it all beats you down, and it takes what little courage I can muster some days just to go to the grocery store and face the world!!!! I do try to do a few shows to make a little money, (one or 2 per yr) and it's hard to make something and offer it only to be rejected...not to mention the physical exhaustion from setting up/tear down, and the initial cost of materials, etc. But at least I have that option.

There are many far braver souls out there than I, and with far worse problems. I truly am grateful for what I have. And I will keep trying to make it, being frugal, but also trying to reach out to others to help them when I can. Thank you for your help offered and your kindness.

hard to believe one week can change my outlook so much, but suppose that's normal with life's ups and downs. So...maybe in another week it will be brighter???

[creeksitter]

Stealth, how do you handle being an absentee landlord?

[StealthRabbit]

Originally Posted by creeksitter

...absentee landlord?

1) ROBUST Lease agreement (Scares off the flakes)

2) very disciplined INTERVIEW / screening process. (I advertise as TAKING applications and I STATE my requirements in ads (to weed out the riff-raff) I PREFER older (age 40+) single males or females that PREFER to live in countryside cottage and PLAN to stay. Hobbies that impress me (sewing, gardening, plants, woodworking) get EXTRA points, as does a JOB

3) Frequent visits by me or NEIGHBORS who care

4) Concise list of 'preferred' repair people with instructions to USE them, NOT ME! (Repair folks know I WILL pay them (extra) and they show up QUICK) I have called 2 repair guys in 30 yrs of rental ownership.

5) Perks...(written into contract)
IF on time 100% with rents, no issues I needed to intervene, AND no unnecessary complaints...
1/2 month rent refund on 15 Dec each yr for first 5 yrs
1 month rent refund on 15 Dec 6 yrs or more residency.

6) Retain pleasant relationship with renters... Do something special for them every yr. (fix up house, driveway, shop, yard, buy them a rototiller, or mower (for property)

BTW... I'm known as a 'benevolent landlord', tho I'm FIRM. I will buy / bring firewood / groceries / Fish / garden produce / plants... to help them out when they are out of work, sick, or down...

I have been known to SELL places to tenants (Commercial and residential), which I will eventually do for all my places.

I have NO time for managing rentals (always worked 3 jobs / fulltime volunteer services / Homeschooled / farmed + travel extensively. When you realize EACH $1000/month rental is 1/4 your TOTAL salary (when employed), you decide, Hum... Time managing rental =< 1/4th labor hrs / yr (500hrs) for a STINK'n job

4-5 rentals = $50-$60K/ YR income... Hum.... How well do I like that STINK'n Job?

(I'll take 5 rentals, thank you very much...)
@ age 70+ there will be 5 SOLD rentals @ 30% down and ME carrying back the contracts (5x house payments). I will be staying in a rural senior Housing Co-op cottage village (even if I have to build it myself ... Ugh... (I'm tired)

[Avalon08]

Artangel, I am so sorry to hear about that dental situation -- OMG, that's awful! Can I ask, what on earth do you need done that costs $12K? I don't know how old you are, but there was a recent thread about this issue in which many of us said we are done with the expensive implants and crowns at this stage of our lives. And definitely check dental schools.

[sera]

So! When next Spring? are we getting together, April, May and where to discuss the cities we are interested
in living, getting to meet each other ?

First time I lived with 3 roommates in Chicago, we didn't know each other before the townhouse, got along quite well.
All of us had jobs, housework completed by us, each had a shelf in the refrigerator, this was about 45 ? ! years ago.
(There was a roommate at first, didn't fit in, she moved, the new roommate compatible)

[artangel]

Thank you Avalon and Sera(private message)! I need 6 crowns and a filling. I have very old and massive fillings due to poor care/diet when a kid. I have been a responsible adult and done all I could to take care of my teeth. One is a front tooth with radiating stress fractures under the filling and the others show signs of decay on the x-rays underneath the filling without enough good enamel/tooth to drill out and put in new ones.

I have been able to get cost down to 8,500 with one insurance plan. Still not sure what I'll do completely, but will take care of front one soon.

Unfortunately, I am a very anxiety-ridden patient in the dentist chair and have to steel myself for each time. I had so much painful work done as a child! But I have always practiced good oral hygiene and taken care of my teeth. Always went to 6 mo check-ups until after my divorce and move when money became a real issue.......but still did all required of me until 3 years ago. Wow! Just wasn't expecting this!

Thanks for your comments and concerns. I thought I'd covered all the "what-if's" in my retirement scenario...this was a real big one I missed! So just posting my story partially to vent but also in case someone else hadn't considered the extremely high cost of dental care.