Why Are People In The Bay Area So Soft? (Fillmore: malls, gangs)

[jman650]

Originally Posted by Gentoo

True although I'd say a hotbed of outspoken liberals...ok...a few radicals are mixed in that's fair.

Bay Area soft? Hmmmmm....how soft does one have to be to take a protest onto I 880 when rush hour traffic is beginning? You all remember that? The protest for cutting school funding I believe it was? Started at Cal and went to downtown Oakland and a few of the protesters (the professional protesters that like to stir things up) jumped onto the freeway. One leaped off the freeway trying to avoid police. SF had a similar although less dramatic protest. How the hell is this soft?

Good point to mention this sur. Let's see the excuses some will have for this LOL

Actually "soft" is what I and many others (including NYers like Ghostface Killah) call NYC for not reacting when Abner Louima was beaten and sodimized and Amadou Diallo was shot at 41 times (hit 19 times) by the police. Over here there would have been riots, over there you could hear crickets. Well you know, crickets mixed in with NYers honking their horns and telling people how tough they are.

[jman650]

Originally Posted by larrybiz

Why Are People In The Bay Area So Soft?

idk, Cottonelle perhaps???

Lol.

[revelated]

Originally Posted by Donald342

I originally moved to SF from New York city for a job (they paid for the relocation and such) a couple months ago. And man, its been a major culture shift which is ok I suppose. But also very irritating in a number of ways to a life long east coaster like myself. Almost to the point of making normal social interaction difficult because of over-PC ness.

"Sarcasm" seems to be lost on most people here. They all look at me with blank stares when I make a sarcastic joke or comment.

Say "thats gay" your called out as a homophobe.

People give you stares of disaproval if your the type of person that looks like to have somewhere to go, commitments to make, likes to dress up for business etc. Just no sense of working to "get ahead". What gives? Do people here just prefer others to be as miserable, non-goal oriented, aim-less and broke as they are?

Overall the people in this area seem to lack alot of aspects of character and tend to be very introverted and quiet. I also see theres less of an energy here. Everything from major stores to mom and pop shops to restaurants closes early and people don't seem to care. Even nightclubs close early (WTF?).

Anyways I was just venting. Personally I think the weather is great here, but I like the east coast better in terms of the relationships, people and the overall attitude of most people. I just gel well with folks who are more honest about themselves and know how to stick up for themselves without complaining or crying. Those types are usually laughed out of New York City. Its very soft.

How can people live like this day and day out and not go crazy?

/rant

I'm confused. Why is this specific to San Francisco?

This is...pardon the term...vintage California, not just one city, especially the bolded line. I don't necessarily agree with the "stares of disapproval" - nobody disapproves of a goal-oriented person. It's more that people don't understand a person who is focused and driven.

I myself am surrounded by people who go to parties almost every other night, clubs almost every other night, surf, ski, skate, etc etc etc....then go to work and stay on Facebook/Google/Twitter for 6 out of the 8 hours. I then get criticized as to why I choose to keep my face to the grind...given I've got work to do and all. People are actually offended when they ask me to go do something with them and I tell them that I'm busy working - and they SEE me busy working on major projects yet they don't seem to get it.

Vintage California, not any one city. It is what it is.

[grapico]

Originally Posted by revelated

I'm confused. Why is this specific to San Francisco?

This is...pardon the term...vintage California, not just one city, especially the bolded line. I don't necessarily agree with the "stares of disapproval" - nobody disapproves of a goal-oriented person. It's more that people don't understand a person who is focused and driven.

I myself am surrounded by people who go to parties almost every other night, clubs almost every other night, surf, ski, skate, etc etc etc....then go to work and stay on Facebook/Google/Twitter for 6 out of the 8 hours. I then get criticized as to why I choose to keep my face to the grind...given I've got work to do and all. People are actually offended when they ask me to go do something with them and I tell them that I'm busy working - and they SEE me busy working on major projects yet they don't seem to get it.

Vintage California, not any one city. It is what it is.

I think this actually nailed it, no offense, it is just what it is. I have experienced that myself also. Again it is nothing bad but it is called laid back for a reason. Note I am not originally from east coast or California and have lived allover the country, (fl, ca, il, pa) so... I have a pretty good eye for these things, and I am very driven/focused/goal oriented, however you want to call it so I have dealt with it a few times. And no, I don't have a stick up my ass, it is just a regional difference honestly. I was actually before just pretty normal in the grand scheme of those things, but here it tilts to the "work a holic" side. I work about 55 hours a week, and please correct me if I am wrong but that is seen as work aholic here? But I used to pull like 70-80, which still wasn't really out of the ordinary.

[revelated]

Originally Posted by grapico

I think this actually nailed it, no offense, it is just what it is. I have experienced that myself also. Again it is nothing bad but it is called laid back for a reason. Note I am not originally from east coast or California and have lived allover the country, (fl, ca, il, pa) so... I have a pretty good eye for these things, and I am very driven/focused/goal oriented, however you want to call it so I have dealt with it a few times. And no, I don't have a stick up my ass, it is just a regional difference honestly. I was actually before just pretty normal in the grand scheme of those things, but here it tilts to the "work a holic" side. I work about 55 hours a week, and please correct me if I am wrong but that is seen as work aholic here? But I used to pull like 70-80, which still wasn't really out of the ordinary.

In my experience you're seen as a workaholic if you-

1. Work ANY overtime, not just one hour, ANY overtime
2. Work through your break(s)
3. Take a short lunch to get something done or eat while working
4. Show up early and/or leave late
5. Forward your work calls to a cell phone so you can keep in touch with your clients/customers/etc
6. Set up your home computer to retrieve your work email
7. Willingly and happily accept new challenges from management
8. Say "yes" when you're asked if something is possible (especially if it's an easy something, which is really mind boggling)
9. Ask to be salaried so that you can work without being inhibited by timesheets or hourly rates
10. Work on the weekend of your own accord

I do and have done all of the above. However I don't consider myself a workaholic. For me, work keeps me focused on what's important. It also develops me and keeps me on my toes, so that if something ever happens and I lose a job, I don't have to worry about finding another one. Within the span of one year I've accumulated more professional certifications than ever in my life, with intentions of getting at least three more within the next year, all paid for by my company. They pay me well, they definitely value my contributions, so I feel obliged to give 150% of myself back to them to show them that I'm not a fly-by-night kind of guy. I believe the more you give to a company, the better off you are come time to sell yourself to anyone. And in truth I'm WAY better off than anyone I grew up with because of that mentality.

[jman650]

Originally Posted by Gentoo

You're stupid! I never said anything about a homeless problem being the same as anywhere else. In fact, when did I say anything about a homeless problem? If you're going to respond to my post can you at least actually read my post before you make yourself look completely retarded?

I believe his answer would have to be NO.

[jman650]

Originally Posted by stuckinsf

Also you idiots never addressed the original question, why you guys are so soft.

Why are we so soft? I believe a better question would be why are we such a magnet for transplants who suck at life and can't adapt?

Why are you whiny transplants such crybabies? Seriously, I'd love to know.

Originally Posted by stuckinsf

The people from the East Coast do go crazy. The people here are a bunch of soft *******; hence the reason we go back.

Right, we're the ******* yet you're the only one here who's too chicken sh*t to use his horn, tell a homeless guy to F--- off, or even man-up and learn to adapt and make this place livable instead of whining and b*tching in forums online. Coming from you that's not even insulting. Its the equivalent of some 4'2" incontinent scoliosis/asthma kid with brittle bones telling me he could kick my ass. It really doesn't mean anything.

[jman650]

Originally Posted by Kense

Why do New Yorkers think they are so tough? It's an act that's why, people like you live vicariously all the mafioso stereotypes that have come out of back east living, so you feel that you are some how tougher and more street smart. It's a facade.

Complaining about everything makes you sound like the "*******" you're complaining about. Waaaa waaaaa I hate it here. Ok, well pack your shi* and get the hell out already.

EXACTLY!!

Originally Posted by rah

If the women here are actually all ugly, then the doctor must have accidentally snipped my retinas instead of my umbilical cord, and i've been living a lie my entire life.

I have a friend from Tanzania who LOVES the marina district because of the "marina girls." Hint to those who don't know: marina girls are often verrry pretty (and rich, and stuck up). So i guess my foreign friend got his retinas screwed up at birth too. In fact SF must be the dumping ground for people with screwed vision, if so many of us think all these shrek lookalikes we have here are actually good looking!

Seriously...some people just live in their own little reality. It's usually a severe lack of objectivity i think, but sometimes the person in question is probably just self-centered, doesn't observe their surroundings much, has some personal issues, and they read everything they can into their own problems and misconceptions, perpetuating their own cycle of misery and ignorance.

The funniest thing? Less than 30% of SF's population are even SF natives...so many--probably the majority--of the people that these whiny transplants like stuckinsf are whining about are actually transplants themselves.

I fully agree.

[hsw]

Sampling bias

Most of highest earners in either Manhattan or SV/SF aren't originally from area (or not from either NYC or City of SF itself); most are from middle-income suburbia somewhere and migrated to wherever career opps are best

Even old dudes like Steve Jobs grew up in suburban Cupertino; the google co-founders are from suburban Wash and MI Podunk, etc etc...same socio-economic dynamics among top NYC hedgies

And NYC is full of lower-income people pretending to work harder than they really are (or vs what any employer is willing to pay for their "work")...and SV is full of rather wealthy, self-made dudes pretending to be far more "laid-back" than they really are

Summer in NYC reveals all the slackers trying to catch a 3rdWorld train/bus to Hamptons for 85F and humid, instead of 87F and humid in Manhattan....not a lot of excuse of uncivilized weather in car-centric PaloAlto area, in summer or winter...

In Berry/iPhone era, emails are time-stamped; can work anywhere/anytime/dressed casually or not....and in a globalized era, if anything, would argue more workaholics exist among top engineers and financiers in SV than anywhere on planet....including vs the much-revered MidtownManhattan or 200 WestSt...

[cwaggy]

Just too many hot hot hot SF babes looking for a NYC Type-A personality mensch like me....thats why I am bi. Bi-coastal that is.