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"its mentally exhausting being on display for the entire office all day long"
It sounds horrible. I would try and focus on letting the manager know privately that you are very committed to the job and team but that you need alone time in the middle of the day to restore and then come back and contribute after lunch. Point out the other teams, where it is common for employees to get alone time on lunch to de-stress.
She needs to "get real". She sounds like a self-centered, young person?
I would have to change teams or jobs. I CANNOT be ON all day at work.
Nope. This kind of stuff happens all the time. I have seen it multiple times over the years. Finance/Billing departments in medium sized independent companies in NYC are famous for these type of kool-aid routines.
In New York City? Sorry, no, name one company in NYC that has daily 3-hour lunches like this.
It this were something that you were asked to do occasionally, every few months, it wouldn't seem as imposing. In that case, I'd try to be open to it to get along even if it's not your favorite thing. But every day is odd and excessive.
And on splitting the ticket with expensive eaters, I would simply tell the wait staff that you will be needing a separate check and if the other work mates want to split the cost evenly, they can do so. Expecting you to do this definitely crosses a boundary when someone or multiple people are ordering an excessive amount of expensive food and drink and to freeload off you every day makes it even more absurd.
The only exception would be if this job were paying rediculous sums of money. If the OP is netting 200k a year after taxes and housing then I would put up with it. But if this is some mediocre payed job I would just get my own check and refuse to pay. My money is my freedom,
"its mentally exhausting being on display for the entire office all day long"
It sounds horrible. I would try and focus on letting the manager know privately that you are very committed to the job and team but that you need alone time in the middle of the day to restore and then come back and contribute after lunch. Point out the other teams, where it is common for employees to get alone time on lunch to de-stress.
She needs to "get real". She sounds like a self-centered, young person?
I would have to change teams or jobs. I CANNOT be ON all day at work.
No kidding and if people were honest they are not ON even when it’s not lunch time. People have just been programmed and conditioned to say “at lunch” because our slave driving work culture can’t imagine that someone may need a mental break out side of lunch.
Exactly. So, if this was real, why give in to this bizarre situation?
They can’t fire you if they are violating a state or federal labor law to do it. Just because they make up another reason doesn’t make that reason true. If this is in a state that require an unpaid or paid lunchtime away from work duties, the OP can just complain to the state Department of Labor that everyone is being required to work through lunch.
I am literally contemplating on leaving a job that I other wise like over my manager requiring that I go out with the team to eat lunch every day. This is has been an issue to me for a few reasons....
My manager has sent me a big long email reprimanding me today because I chose not to go out to lunch and eat at an ethiopian restaurant. Because we are a work family and have to eat together. Her counter was that I could choose lunch 1 day a week. I find this totally unreasonable .
This woman is a Mommy Monster disguised as a boss. No way she should own your lunch hour...find a way to go bye-bye asap.
Find another job quickly this woman needs some mental counseling she is a control freak , yep find your bye bye real quick . In the interview ask if they do group lunches 5 days a week . Just kidding don't ask that but make a point to say my lunch hour is my time to re group with myself .
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