Is Missouri truely a hate state?

[ajf131]

Originally Posted by JCrow Nuremberg

Can whites truly, objectively, say or judge whether or not their community, hometown, or state is a 'hate' state? I think not.

A lot of people (white) romanticize and trivialize what they see and hear, believing things aren't as worse as some make it out to be.

The experiences between whites and minorities is too different and only whites have the privilege of being the outsider (casual observer) looking in - trying to judge themselves from a position they aren't even (or will ever really be) apart of. A lot of them think that if no one is spray painting the 'N' word on your door or burning a cross in your yard, then there is no problems to speak of or mention. They may not even be aware of the more subvert, insidious, and not-so-subtle ways hatred and intolerance may manifest in some groups or areas.

I am considering an interview for a position in Bonne Terre. If I get the job I may have to move there. I lived in Farmington and Excelsior Springs before and while I wouldn't necissarily classify the residents as 'hateful,' I got the usual racial-isms for anyone that is dark/black and living in an all or predominately white town is use to or expect (followed around the store, stopped by police {while WALKING} probably more than anyone who lived in the town, mistaken for the domestic or occupational 'help' on several occassions, clerks and sales people asking whites first what they wanted even tho I was ahead in line, and once I got screamed at to 'get off someone's lawn' even tho that meant I'd be walking in a busy street). I kept getting stared at by everyone, which I chalked up to curiosity about why there happen to be a 'darkie' among them in this part of the world.

Missouri is racially divided and racially polarized even in the more metropolitan areas of Kansas City and Saint Louis. The areas outside of those are probably even more more so.

Missouri is no different from any other state in this country. Every state and city from the way I see it is like that. Racial division and polarization exists in every corner of this country.

[bentaxlecrew]

So so true. Here in Cali also. Me being white ,a minority here, have recently understood how racism can make you feel. I understand my experience is mild compared to most. I have been waiting in a line and had hispanics help another hispanic before helping me. Or see the friendly greetings they have for one another while they can barely stomach helping me. I have lost out on work along with many others because we dont speak thier language. It is an odd feeling for me. I guess because its new. I am not prejudice against any color. I am prejudice against hateful people. People who are violent, that kind of thing. If you can even call it that. I dont treat them bad.
Jcrow if you were n my neighborhood I would let you walk across my yard. You can even take a seat if you like. Coffee or tea?

[collected_eve]

Originally Posted by southerngurl

That would be Bollinger co, southeast of Farmington. I'm not accepted here because I'm from the deep, deep south. Very clannish here, if your parents and gparents weren't born and raised here you are SOL. Been here 9 years, we'll be moving way south before too long. There are a few here who don't prejudge me because I'm from the south, complete with a real southern drawl. They are the only people I have anything to do with. If someone is civil to me I'm friendly to them too. But as far as trying to lose my accent or buying friendship, it 's not gonna happen, I don't need or want them.

In short, you will meet some people who have intelligence and won't prejudge you. It would be this way in most parts of the country. There will always be the good ole boys and girls no matter where you are.

With my experience, I would have to disagree with this.

I moved from southern Louisiana, deep down Cajun Country, when I was 18 to Missouri. People where very accepting of me & my deep southern drawl. Actually, I found more midwest folk to be a bit intrigued by the way I talk. I still get the occasional, "Nice accent!"
Clannish?? Are you kidding!! This has got to be just a really bad joke! Clannish towards who? The south is much more well known as being "clannish."
I find the midwest to have the same hospitality, friendliness & be very accepting of southern people.

So, Missouri a hate state. Absolutely not.

[seahawksweetie]

Originally Posted by bentaxlecrew

So so true. Here in Cali also. Me being white ,a minority here, have recently understood how racism can make you feel. I understand my experience is mild compared to most. I have been waiting in a line and had hispanics help another hispanic before helping me. Or see the friendly greetings they have for one another while they can barely stomach helping me. I have lost out on work along with many others because we dont speak thier language. It is an odd feeling for me. I guess because its new. I am not prejudice against any color. I am prejudice against hateful people. People who are violent, that kind of thing. If you can even call it that. I dont treat them bad.
Jcrow if you were n my neighborhood I would let you walk across my yard. You can even take a seat if you like. Coffee or tea?

I agree. I live down here in the San Diego area, also white, and very much a minority. I don't judge people on their color, religion or anything else. It is not my place to do so. I am very accepting of everyone, except hateful people and illegal immigrants (which I know is a whole other topic-so i'll just stop there).

Meanwhile, I'm anxiously waiting on our relocation to MO (depending on if hubby gets the job or not). I should think we would know next week.

Missouri is absolutely beautiful and the people here on this forum from there are great representatives of their state. Very helpful and friendly. Thanks for all the wonderful info you have posted!

[skeating]

MO is not any different than any other state. We have all races here and accept all races like everyone else. My husband is French,Indian,English, but looks Spanish or Italian. We have lived in MO all our lives, no one gives us any grief and never do they concern themselves with his race.. Behave properly and treat people respectfully and you will receive the same treatment.. "reap what you sow"

[JCrow Nuremberg]

My bad.

Excuse me for interrupting a delightfully insightful conversation.
After all, what the hell do I know about discrimination, prejudice, and ‘hate’ states
I'm quite the amateur, really.

Back to your regularly scheduled programming. Thank you.

[Hockeynut]

As sickening and unfortunate as it is Racism is alive and kicking. You can find it no matter where you go. Sometimes I cant help but think that we all have a hand in this, myself included. And I dont mean that any of us are out there throwing out vulgar names or discriminating against others. I live here in Philadelphia so it is as diversed as you are gonna get and I have been to the playground often. I sit and watch the kids play and it is so funny to see the younger kids like 7 and under just running around playing with each other, holding hands and hugging each other goodbye. Those kids are color blind all they know is that is their friend and they enjoy being with them. As I watch the older kids play together you can see the hesitation they have approaching each other and just socializing. I just cant help but wonder what is so different that we are doing as a community, parents, friends, teachers and human beings that changes this. The sad truth of it all is that bad people come in all colors, ages, backgrounds and sizes and the worst part of it all is that is always the innocent people suffering from others ignorances. I'll leave you all with this little conversation I heard at the playground. Now keep in mind that I am a single dad so I am really not into the gossip thing with the moms at the playground but I did have a group of them talking about a fire that had happened the previous night in which some children had died and I will never forget hearing one of the mothers say "well what color were the kids" I just about fell off of the park bench and just couldnt help but interrupt and say does it matter what color they are children died. Its ignorance like that which makes you shake your head, I mean this is a mother here and losing a child is the worse thing that could happen to any parent and to this day I cant imagine what would make someone think that but have the guts to say it outloud. I know I make it a point to teach my kids dont judge anyone by race, money or popularity. You judge others by how they treat you, if you live your life like that you will experience so much more life and be a better person for it. Sorry its a long post but we are all in this together life that is and the sooner we realize it the better off we will all.

[bentaxlecrew]

Amen to that! Hockynut

[Northwoods Voyager]

States are not racist...people are. Individual people. I grew up in St. Louis in what is now referred to as the 'Central West End'. Nice homes, small parks, little and big stores. Just a neighborhood with mostly friendly people. Good, if not great schools. And all white. Just the way it happened to be. Closest neighbors of other races lived about 5-6 blocks east of us.

I delivered groceries on my bike at age 12. Went into different neighborhoods. Never had any cause for concern. I do not remember the hatred now being shown by most races towards each other. As I grew older and moved to different cities, the racism began to be evident.

In my mid 20's I was employed by a university and my immediate supervisor was a Black man. Kind, thoughtful, intelligent, are just a few words to describe him. One of the best 'bosses' that I ever had the pleasure to work for/with. This man showed no indication of having a 'race problem'. Only time that I was struck by racism was from a younger girl that I had hired.

She was Black, and never let me forget it. From the first week she started to imply that she had been hired as a token n****. I, at first, was astounded by her actions and words. Even a brief one on one talk did nothing to lessen her way of thinking and behaving. After a discussion with my boss, she still behaved in this manner and eventually this led to her being discharged. Very sad. She was highly qualified for the position and this could/would have led to promotions in the future for her.

After this encounter, I became more astute in my personal relationships with others. I do wish that most if not all would not be on the defensive during first meetings. This is when, to my way of thinking, the line in the sand is drawn. If you have a chip on your shoulder from a previous situation, don't bring it to the current engagement. Please take a wait and see attitude and then go with the flow. I so realize that this is full of short little sayings, but it is how I feel. There is no need to be a racist. On ALL sides.

[Lake Junkie]

A lot of good points here. NWV...right on from my perspective.

When I was 16 I was sent to a girls school in Oakland Ca. (Giving the parents a bit of a run...) The races tended to keep to themselves, except for me. I was clueless, I guess. The white girls were timid & stayed to themselves, the hispanics I couldn't understand and the black girls were a gas! So I hung out with the fun girls who just happened to be black. I made several good friends over the course of the year, until a new girl was admitted and bunked in my small dorm. She seemed to be looking for trouble and one day I stood up to her and she started a fight. It doesn't matter who "won"...because no one did. From that day on my "friends" wouldn't talk to me. The new girl was black.

I also concede that we honkies have no way of knowing what it feels like.
I can't tell you if the Branson area is racist as a whole. How would I know?

The way out of this mess, as far as I can see, is for all of us to examine our OWN attitudes to see if WE are perpetuating the problem.

I will...how 'bout you'ns?