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I personally would remove myself from the situation for a while. Can you confront them in a positive way how you feel about their behaviors towards you??
Parents do have a hard time seeing their children as adults...at least some do. I'm sorry your family sounds like this.
Have you earned respect? Do you have meaningful work? And are you drug free? Do you have outside interests? Care about your fellow man? Are you without rage and anger? Are you generally thoughtful and good?
Don't buy into their comments. Continue to respond in an adult way....
For me whenever I try to talk to my family about something they don't pay attention or make a joke about what I said and laugh at me. My mom always says that I can talk to her but whenever I try she says that she doesn't have time or shes doing something else. It gets really discouraging and I feel like they don't care. My siblings always make fun of me and make me feel like I'm worthless and it's making me feel really ****ty.
I don't want to talk to my friends because they have their own problems and I know for a fact that they would think I was joking. Even if they didn't they would brush it off and say, "Oh okay." and go back to what they were doing.
As of late I have been really stressed out because of school work. I missed school for 11 days and I have about a month to finish it all. I'm also getting new projects everyday in each of my classes so the work keeps piling on and on.
I want to talk to a therapist just to rant and get it all out but I don't want to tell my parents about it and I don't know how to ask my school's counselor.
They really don't and it eats me alive. I don't know what the chuck I have to do sometimes to get their respect. It's like, no matter what I do-to them-it's never important. They act as if whatever I am doing is of no importance, that I can just drop whatever it is I am doing and do what they want. Every time I plan on doing something, or want to do something, plan on doing something, it's a "whatever" to them. Its one thing if I have to deal with if but I LIVE with it.
Today for instance, I told my mother that I wanted to take my little brothers to karate class after school. However, she goes and takes them shopping, after I took time off so I can take them like I promised. I dropped all the other stuff that I COULD have done with my time just so I can take them but she takes them shopping and says she forgot. She didn't even frakkin apologize! AT LEAST apologize!
What she did wasn't terrible but whenever my time is wasted, its nothing to her because its never a big deal. My family acts as if I don't work, have a hobby and sit at home all day every day with my thumb up my ass. Even if I am working, they'll call me and ask me stupid questions as if I am not working! I.E: Are you home? Can you do this? It's just like they assume stuff.
I'm telling you, no matter what I do in life, no matter what I accomplish, no matter what I achieve, its nothing to them.
I don't ask to be celebrated, put on a pedestal, praised for everything but I would appreciate more respect. I don't even bother talking to them about it because it usually turns into an argument because they blow it off, which in turn angers me and they I have to get nasty because I feel like my point wasn't proven.
This frustrates me a whole lot. I can climb Mt. Everest 3 times and they wouldn't think its a big deal. I feel undermined and unappreciated. I feel they never really listen to me...I don't know what to do.
Anyone else ever have this issue with their family?
Why do you feel like you need recognition from them?
IMO if they don’t repect you for who you are then fug em move on and find others who will treat you as you would treat them. Just because you’re bound by blood doesn’t mean you’re obligated to like them.
For me whenever I try to talk to my family about something they don't pay attention or make a joke about what I said and laugh at me. My mom always says that I can talk to her but whenever I try she says that she doesn't have time or shes doing something else. It gets really discouraging and I feel like they don't care. My siblings always make fun of me and make me feel like I'm worthless and it's making me feel really ****ty.
I don't want to talk to my friends because they have their own problems and I know for a fact that they would think I was joking. Even if they didn't they would brush it off and say, "Oh okay." and go back to what they were doing.
As of late I have been really stressed out because of school work. I missed school for 11 days and I have about a month to finish it all. I'm also getting new projects everyday in each of my classes so the work keeps piling on and on.
I want to talk to a therapist just to rant and get it all out but I don't want to tell my parents about it and I don't know how to ask my school's counselor.
How do your parents treat your siblings? Do they take their concerns seriously? Do they give them more attention and support? Is there a pattern present, where the sibs consistently get treated better?
They really don't and it eats me alive. I don't know what the chuck I have to do sometimes to get their respect. It's like, no matter what I do-to them-it's never important. They act as if whatever I am doing is of no importance, that I can just drop whatever it is I am doing and do what they want. Every time I plan on doing something, or want to do something, plan on doing something, it's a "whatever" to them. Its one thing if I have to deal with if but I LIVE with it.
Today for instance, I told my mother that I wanted to take my little brothers to karate class after school. However, she goes and takes them shopping, after I took time off so I can take them like I promised. I dropped all the other stuff that I COULD have done with my time just so I can take them but she takes them shopping and says she forgot. She didn't even frakkin apologize! AT LEAST apologize!
Did you ASK her if you could take your little brothers to karate class, or did you tell her? Because it seems to me they are her children, not yours, and while it's nice you want to do things for them, they are her responsibility and maybe, just maybe, she felt like if you don't even have the decency to ASK her if it's okay if you take them to karate class, she's not going to let you. Maybe taking them shopping was her passive aggressive way of trying to tell you that you shouldn't be telling her what you're going to do with HER children, but rather that you should be ASKING. Granted, passive aggressive ways of dealing with things are rarely productive, but that is my take on what happened. Maybe this has less to do with them not respecting you and more to do with you not respecting them.
Have you ever told them how you feel? Because if not, you can't expect them to know or change.
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