Saw a friend's wife out with another man, should I tell? (jealous, girlfriend)

[HighFlyingBird]

I think you should. It won't be easy, but it's the right thing to do. How you do it I think depends on how close you are with your friend.

I think if you are close, face to face is best. If not, an email is ok

But don't say "your wife is cheating" just explain what you saw and leave the conclusions to him.

[LoriBee62]

Yes. Tell your friend.

[TUMF]

I agree with those that say to let him know... and - of course - face to face... and, get ready for some hugs...he's gonna need 'em....

[1986pacecar]

I know I'd want someone telling me if they found my wife out with another man. Some may consider it butting in but how's it help him if she's cheating and he's in the dark? It would definitely be hard to do but in the long run he's better off knowing.

[Rusty Avocado]

I would sure want to know...

[Gudra]

I would, too but could the pair possibly practise an OPEN- type marriage ?

[Old Guard]

Yes, let him know so this can all get turned around on you. There is nothing but good that can come from this.

[jambo101]

Originally Posted by Stagemomma

I say go with an anonymous message, your friend can follow up as he chooses and will save face with you.

Best way to do it is anonymously .

[animalcrazy]

Oh that's a tough one. Who wants to break another person's heart? I guess a lot would depend on how well you know your friend. There are some women out there that would want to know and others that would prefer to stick their head in the sand. Something similar happened to me in my 20's when I saw a friends husband being a tad to cozy with the local bar fly. I confronted both of them and the woman followed me into the bathroom where we continued to discuss why what they were doing was wrong. She saw my side of the argument and he went home that night to his wife, however, the next day was their anniversary and he was gone all night. Damn alcoholics! It was incredibly sad but they are still together today.

Another friends husband told me that he had been to the Mustang Ranch while he was married to my friend. It was thirty years ago when they were newly married. I keep that secret with me and will to my grave.

My best friend cheated on her husband which was a total shock to me. I never knew their marriage was that unhappy until she told me what was really going on. I'll never tell him because I don't want to be responsible for her demise. I'm serious here.

If I saw my best friends husband doing something inappropriate with another woman I would join them at their table and go on and on about my friend in front of him and the other woman. What if she didn't know he was married? Then I would ask him to follow me some place private for an in depth discussion. I would also show him the photo I had taken of them and had already sent to my e-mail. We would discuss at length why he is doing what he's doing because we don't always know what's really going on in a marriage. There needs to be some deep thought before you have a knee jerk reaction and blow someone's life apart.

I am one of those women that would want to know. I prefer dealing with bottom lines and if you are my friend you would be in deep water if you knew and didn't tell me. There is always the risk of infections and I prefer not to have one of the serious one's thank you. Being in health care for 25 years makes you a tad paranoid. Poor John had a male health scare a couple of months back. He had just returned from visiting his terminally ill sister and found something suspicious. Like any good internet physician he went on line and was convinced that he had some kind of infection. I was horrified because I knew it hadn't come from me, but I also knew in my heart that there was another explanation. I was insulted that he thought for even one minute that I would do anything like that to him, but I also understood because there was a new male friend in my life, but he was just that and nothing more. I told him it was a cyst and his MD confirmed that it was indeed a cyst. We will be celebrating 30 years together in a castle in Scotland next month. He's the love of my life, but if anyone see's him with another woman then I want to know!

[LakeLifePA]

Originally Posted by BamaBlue

I was at lunch and saw a friend's wife at lunch with a man who was not her husband. They seemed rather intimate. Snuggly & kissing, having some drinks with their food. They didn't see me. Should I tell him?

I would say something, because if it were my wife I would want to know.

Originally Posted by HighFlyingBird

But don't say "your wife is cheating" just explain what you saw and leave the conclusions to him.

I think this is appropriate as well.