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I was at lunch and saw a friend's wife at lunch with a man who was not her husband. They seemed rather intimate. Snuggly & kissing, having some drinks with their food. They didn't see me. Should I tell him?
Well......
You could mention to your friend that you saw his wife at so & so restaurant on such & such date. Leave it to him to ask her the questions. What where you doing at so & so the other day and who where you with??? I 'm sure she will confess right there on the spot... Not! It could have been nothing, or maybe it was but intervention never helps one way or the other...
You saw them and watched them long enough to know they were on a date, but they didn't see you at all? Something sounds weird about that to me.
I see nothing odd about that. One time I was at a restaurant with my family and some friends, and I was so engrossed in our conversation that I failed to notice a good friend of mine sitting a few tables away. Had he not come over to my table to say hi, I never would have known he was there.
Another time, I was eating out with my family when I noticed another friend of mine at another table. I went over to him, and he was surprised to see me; he had no idea I was there.
I can't believe anyone thinks they could tell a guy they saw his wife out with another man and it would go well... for them! I may have skipped a cou... several, pages getting here with this wisdom but... did anyone think of confronting the wife first? There is the small but not insignificant possibility that what the o.p. witnessed was a hotwife on a date. A date that her husband knew about and was eagerly awaiting the details of upon the wife's return home. I know, I know, never thought of that. Too busy being middle class Americans.
I never thought of that either. When my friend cheated on her husband she made me swear to never tell another soul. A promise is a promise so I kept it to myself. My husband knows only because I had a hard time with it. I've decided that I'll never tell him because her friendship means more to me then breaking up an already fragile, dysfunctional marriage. They can do that on their own...or not.
There's really not a lot to debate. Tell him their marriage is not your concern, but that you wanted to make sure he knew before he gets diseased or hurt psychologically.
A couple's marriage is their own business, as long as they both know everything about it.
If it was just an acquaintance of mine, I would stay out of it. If it's a close friend I care about, I would tell him or her.
I actually met up with a friend (a guy) for drinks before tagging along w/ him & his girlfriend to a party...she was with family and was meeting up with us at the party later. Apparently, a group of her friends were there at the restaurant (they didn't know me) and called her up & told her all about it. She informed them that she was aware.
I would want to know. And I would want my "friend" or whomever to tell me.
The OP could phrase it in a way that isn't accusatory.
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I never thought of that either. When my friend cheated on her husband she made me swear to never tell another soul. A promise is a promise so I kept it to myself. My husband knows only because I had a hard time with it. I've decided that I'll never tell him because her friendship means more to me then breaking up an already fragile, dysfunctional marriage. They can do that on their own...or not.
There's really not a lot to debate. Tell him their marriage is not your concern, but that you wanted to make sure he knew before he gets diseased or hurt psychologically.
