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We have a bathmat so water doesn't get on the bathroom floor. We pick the bathmat up and hang it on the tub/shower after each use. Not rocket science!
The OP just leaves all of her crap all over the place.....somehow I doubt she remembers to pick up a towel since she can't even remember to close the refrigerator or how to put soda cans in it without destroying them.
You and I come from completely different worlds. Even as children, myself and my husband had to put our towels where they belong and it certainly wasn't the floor. My husband and I have very different backgrounds. I grew up in a very abusive family. He grew up with disabled parents who had people catering to every whim they had. Magically, we both know to pick our crap up and not throw things on the floor like we're 3 year olds.
I have friends who physically make their toddlers pick up their toys. Once the children are a certain age, they have to pick up their toys without being told. If they don't, the toys go to the Good Will for other children to enjoy. Few times of their toys going to Good Will, they started picking up their toys. And they actually watched their mom put their toys in bags and they went with mom to Good Will. The older ones even help the younger ones with their toys so no one loses any. Team work! Amazing what 7 year olds can do, but a 30 year old can't!
How do you know what world I came from? I grew up in abject poverty. I was severely abused for my entire childhood. How does this have to do with towels?
We rarely washed towels, we had only a few. We all shared. And if we didn't hang them up, we really heard about it. I started doing my laundry when I was 9...at a laundry mat, alone. With the money I made from babysitting or doing jobs for people around the government funded apartment complex I lived in. If I didn't have money, I didn't get clean clothes. I had to wear my clothes several times before washing them, and usually had 2-3 outfits. I assume this is why I am so finicky about clean clothes and towels. I mean, the washing machine is right here, why not.
So we might come from different worlds...not that many people I know came from my world.
We have a walk in shower and a soaking bath tub. A bath mat doesn't keep any water in. The little rugs get super soaked and we all use one shower. It doesn't dry between people. The floor is also very slippery. So this works. And it doesn't make me a 3 year old or slob. Some people are so stuck on their own perfection is actually amusing.
I want to add that I am very sorry for how your mom treats you. I am a mom and I cannot understand how a parent can act like that. My son (he is in his late 20s) unfortunately also has a biological parent, his father, who has no idea how to be a parent. My son's father, my ex husband, has neglected my son mist of his life and when my son was an adult and met him and tried to talk to him his father started to scream at him and then at me, and was about to physically hit me. My son went through a lot of therapy that was very helpful for him. He is still very agree and hurt but it was easier for him to handle it.
As a teenager, I never left my towel on the floor. I certainly don't do it as an adult. Who wants a stinky towel covered in lint, dirt, pet fur? GROSS! If one picks their towel up and hangs it up, you can use it a few times before washing it. Throwing it on the floor like a child means you can't use it again and you're creating more laundry.
I know some messy adults and none of them leave towels on the floor. My hoarder mother even hangs her towels up! You can't walk through 90% of her house, but her towels are hanging up! Figure that one out.
The op specifically said she doesn't leave wet towels on the floor.
Your husband is treating you like a child, because you are acting like one. Why can't you clean up while he's working his two jobs? Why do you throw your things around the house and leave them there?
Your husband sounds OCD, and maybe cleaning is his way of relaxing, but I don't understand why you don't want to be an equal partner in your marriage.
She is bragging, not complaining. Cant you see that? For her, it means she is more privileged, more pampered, and that is her sense of personal status.
I don't think she's a mom, and she had a job a one point. I don't know if she does now.
I think the issue is their vastly different personalities and upbringing. If he wants to clean, great, but the whole, don't stand on a chair, don't carry the milk jugs is a bit much. He is treating her like she's helpless, but in turn, she's acting like she's helpless.
I think the carrying things is fine. I had a bf that wouldn't let me carry anything.
It's just being a gentlemen, imo.
We'd go to the store and maybe I could carry up something light, like toilet paper, but the look on is face - he didn't like it!
He wasn't being controlling - he felt he was derelict if he did not carry everything. Like a bad person.
I would have loved it if he cleaned everything, ha! He'd say 'we should vacuum' and that meant 'you should vacuum'.
How do you know what world I came from? I grew up in abject poverty. I was severely abused for my entire childhood. How does this have to do with towels?
We have a walk in shower and a soaking bath tub. A bath mat doesn't keep any water in. The little rugs get super soaked and we all use one shower. It doesn't dry between people. The floor is also very slippery. So this works. And it doesn't make me a 3 year old or slob. Some people are so stuck on their own perfection is actually amusing.
Where did I say I know what world you came from? I said we came from different worlds. I come from one where people don't leave towels on the floor or any of our crap waiting for someone else to come along and pick it up.
Sounds like you need a better bathmat. My house is 74 years old and has a slow drain. Still has the original, slippery cast iron tub. We take showers right after each other every morning and don't have a water issue outside our shower. We don't use thin, expensive, or little mats. We have tried a variety of them over the years and some suck! Some would look like it just came out of the washer if a gerbil wiped it's feet off on it.
Did I say you were a 3 year old or slob? Nope. You seem to make mountains out of mole hills and claim people say things they don't actually say.
So how do you take care of the water that got on the floor from your shower? I use two towels (one for hair and one for body) I toss the body one on the floor to soak up the water from getting out of the shower or what splashed. I find those bathroom rugs useless. They never dry! I usually hang up the hair one when I am ready to brush my hair, or I toss it in the laundry. I don't love using towels that were already used, so it doesn't matter to me. A semi full load of towels is the same as a full load of towels to me.
My kids drop their towels in random spots. I only really mind if its on the carpet. My dog loves it...a nice place for a nap. Then I wash it.
I guess I would feel differently if I didn't have a washer and dryer in my home.
I have lots of friends, and I have seen lots of towels on the floor. I have yet to gasp in horror.
But this is a besides...the OP says she hangs towels. So this isn't even part of the post.
As the person who does the majority of the laundry, it really aggravates me when my kids throw their hardly used towels on the floor. It's a waste of time and resources to wash towels because my kids can't be bothered to hang them back up.
Quote:
Originally Posted by OldDocKat
She is bragging, not complaining. Cant you see that? For her, it means she is more privileged, more pampered, and that is her sense of personal status.
No she's not.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jencam
I think the carrying things is fine. I had a bf that wouldn't let me carry anything.
It's just being a gentlemen, imo.
We'd go to the store and maybe I could carry up something light, like toilet paper, but the look on is face - he didn't like it!
He wasn't being controlling - he felt he was derelict if he did not carry everything. Like a bad person.
I would have loved it if he cleaned everything, ha! He'd say 'we should vacuum' and that meant 'you should vacuum'.
It's hard to tell, but given her concern and her other posts, I think he's being controlling. I think she senses that some of his behavior is a stab at her. He has to check the refrigerator every night because she left the door open 3 times. He "has" to clean up her messes because she's clumsy and "might cut her self or slip." It isn't just being gentlemanly. It is actually insulting that he thinks she's incapable.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ss20ts
Where did I say I know what world you came from? I said we came from different worlds. I come from one where people don't leave towels on the floor or any of our crap waiting for someone else to come along and pick it up.
Sounds like you need a better bathmat. My house is 74 years old and has a slow drain. Still has the original, slippery cast iron tub. We take showers right after each other every morning and don't have a water issue outside our shower. We don't use thin, expensive, or little mats. We have tried a variety of them over the years and some suck! Some would look like it just came out of the washer if a gerbil wiped it's feet off on it.
Did I say you were a 3 year old or slob? Nope. You seem to make mountains out of mole hills and claim people say things they don't actually say.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ss20ts
As a teenager, I never left my towel on the floor. I certainly don't do it as an adult. Who wants a stinky towel covered in lint, dirt, pet fur? GROSS! If one picks their towel up and hangs it up, you can use it a few times before washing it. Throwing it on the floor like a child means you can't use it again and you're creating more laundry.
I know some messy adults and none of them leave towels on the floor. My hoarder mother even hangs her towels up! You can't walk through 90% of her house, but her towels are hanging up! Figure that one out.
As the person who does the majority of the laundry, it really aggravates me when my kids throw their hardly used towels on the floor. It's a waste of time and resources to wash towels because my kids can't be bothered to hang them back up.
No she's not.
It's hard to tell, but given her concern and her other posts, I think he's being controlling. I think she senses that some of his behavior is a stab at her. He has to check the refrigerator every night because she left the door open 3 times. He "has" to clean up her messes because she's clumsy and "might cut her self or slip." It isn't just being gentlemanly. It is actually insulting that he thinks she's incapable.
I don't 'hear' her saying that tho. he seems to think he is too clean and weird about all those things.
I agree that men who are controlling don't offer to send to college or China and give money and all that.
I feel like he's just treating her like a delicate flower.
My Dad is this way with me - he would say 'stay back' from something dangerous but he doesn't usually argue if I ignore him.
(My father sometimes helps me fix things in my home, and I hang out with him fixing things while visiting at his house)
But no man ever in my life ever said 'go watch tv while I clean up your mess'.
That is a level of Princess I have not experienced and I've been a Princess!
The bf that wouldn't let me carry things also thought it was an absolute SIN for me to have to prepare dinner by myself.
Absolutely crazy-town to him.
If he wanted to eat with his friends he wouldn't leave until he helped me fix dinner or go to get one from somewhere.
I didn't feel controlled. I felt pampered.
It's the way he grew up - his mother had many many kids and so Dad would come home and proceed to help with or take over all chores so that she could get a break.
He would never eat without her, and in their culture eating alone is horrifying.
So, ok. To me it didn't matter and I felt like he should just go but if it was going to make him feel like crap it would be rude to argue over it all the time.
In his culture a woman never has to work a day in her life is she doesn't want to, even with no kids.
So maybe this man just thinks that a woman is supposed to be a Queen.
He doesn't argue about her going to work, having her own money, etc.
He feels she has a better head for the checkbook.
He seems to have a mix, actually, of having her be a Queen AND he wants things cleaned his way with his hands.
It would make me crazy to try to teach someone to do laundry my way. It's much easier to always do myself.
I want to look each item over for stains and decide on a case-by-case basis how to deal with them.
I want different temps for different things, different cycles, and to decide whether something does or doesn't go in the dryer.
When I had a housekeeper I only let her wash sheets and towels. Because those have the same instructions every time.
My Uncle got my Aunt a housekeeper and she hated it. She wants to do it herself her way.
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I said we came from different worlds. I come from one where people don't leave towels on the floor or any of our crap waiting for someone else to come along and pick it up.
