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Apparently your husband isn't even on friendly terms with the cousin or he would have just picked up the phone and asked. "Dude. Did you forget I was married or wth???"
People are so funny. They act all shady and think it won't be noticed when all they have to do is TALK to the people in advance.
IE If I worked in an office and one of my coworkers said "Look I'd love to have you guys at my wedding but would you be insulted if we only invited you since we're doing it on a budget?" I doubt anyone would be offended.
This whole debate isn't even about the wedding. It's about the reception. And there you have it. $$$
If you can only "afford" to invite one spouse then you can't afford the wedding to begin with and need to scale it BACK.
Same people probably going broke on car payments of cars they can't afford - bet you a dollar.
Way back when, and I paid for my own wedding, I planned the event so that I could afford to invite everyone and their significant others. So we did pit beef, pit ham, salads, fruit, cheese, and an open bar at a local hall, instead of having a meal served in a glamorous venue. Good manners are important.
Way back when, and I paid for my own wedding, I planned the event so that I could afford to invite everyone and their significant others. So we did pit beef, pit ham, salads, fruit, cheese, and an open bar at a local hall, instead of having a meal served in a glamorous venue. Good manners are important.
My parents did pay for most of my wedding but it was very modest in cost because I didn't do all the over-the-top things I see in weddings today. Of course, Pinterest wasn't a "thing" so I did not know what I was missing, lol.
Way back when, and I paid for my own wedding, I planned the event so that I could afford to invite everyone and their significant others. So we did pit beef, pit ham, salads, fruit, cheese, and an open bar at a local hall, instead of having a meal served in a glamorous venue. Good manners are important.
For my daughter's wedding, she and her mother arranged to have the wedding on Saturday morning in the church (in a side chapel) with the reception as "lunch" right there in the same area. Lunch in the church meant: No bar, dude.
Rather than a cake, there was a display of fancy cupcakes, and a lunch-appropriate plate rather than a fancy dinner.
A lot of people are saying this has to be intentional, but rereading the OP, the OP's husband's (male) cousin is the one getting married. If the cousin's fiance (or her family) is doing the invitations, that's enough degrees of separation that an error could easily have been made with the invitations. Call the cousin or the aunt and figure it out.
Apparently your husband isn't even on friendly terms with the cousin or he would have just picked up the phone and asked. "Dude. Did you forget I was married or wth???"
People are so funny. They act all shady and think it won't be noticed when all they have to do is TALK to the people in advance.
IE If I worked in an office and one of my coworkers said "Look I'd love to have you guys at my wedding but would you be insulted if we only invited you since we're doing it on a budget?" I doubt anyone would be offended.
This whole debate isn't even about the wedding. It's about the reception. And there you have it. $$$
If you can only "afford" to invite one spouse then you can't afford the wedding to begin with and need to scale it BACK.
Same people probably going broke on car payments of cars they can't afford - bet you a dollar.
Lots of assuming going on here...
You assume she was excluded...
It could be that they didn't put 1+1 together.
It could be that He (male cousin) was less than helpful with the guest list. My fiance might say the same about me.
It could be that it was a simple misprint. I had two or three invitations come back from the printer wrong.
My fiance has met some of my cousins two or three times, and she still doesn't always remember who is who. It could be she had Brian (the married one) mixed up with Brad (the single one whose date she didn't want to pay for.)
If she is being rude, its just as likely that they don't have room in the reception hall as it is a money thing.
We went with a strict guest policy, that if you weren't married or engaged, no guest. It ruffled some feathers, but frankly I don't need to pay for someone's flavor of the season to eat, drink and be merry.
It could be resolved with a phone call.
But lets be real, its a lot more fun to turn this into a millennial bashing thread.
For my daughter's wedding, she and her mother arranged to have the wedding on Saturday morning in the church (in a side chapel) with the reception as "lunch" right there in the same area. Lunch in the church meant: No bar, dude.
Rather than a cake, there was a display of fancy cupcakes, and a lunch-appropriate plate rather than a fancy dinner.
You sir go to the wrong church! My wedding was in a catholic hall.
The reason I think that omitting the wife on the invitation was not an oversight, but intentional, is that they know, when they are filling out that invitation, that he is married. It would be very hard to "forget" to write her name on it too. It was intentionally left off, and , even if it was a cost saving measure, it was done in very bad taste.
However, being the inquisitive person I am, I would phone the cousin and say "Hey, BTW, you left ______ off of the invitation, what's up with that ?" If they say they were saving money or any other reason than they forgot, I would tell them she and I are a couple and I would never attend without her. Cousin or no cousin, it was rude and they need to be called on it.
For my daughter's wedding, she and her mother arranged to have the wedding on Saturday morning in the church (in a side chapel) with the reception as "lunch" right there in the same area. Lunch in the church meant: No bar, dude.
Must not have been a Catholic church.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck
You sir go to the wrong church! My wedding was in a catholic hall.
Even the Catholic wake I recently attended had an open bar. It was slightly surreal... but hey, if you can't raise a glass with your pal when he's dead, when can you?
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