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I honestly would think it would be exhausting dealing with a newborn in your 40s.
One of the managers at my last employer was born in 1969 and I was hired in 2014 - he had has daughter later that year so he was at least 45 then, then had another son last year. His wife is around his age. I would say she's no younger than 40, and likely older.
Physically, that had to be very hard on her giving birth twice that close together. Also, at that age, you're supposed to be at the peak of your career, and are probably working longer hours, etc., than you ever will. He works from 8-6, is on call all the time, and drives 65 miles one way in rush hour traffic (wife is a principal in a far away school district, and they're obligated to live in that municipality) so his door to door is at least ninety minutes one way.
They do well financially, but I can't imagine the kids are going to have a high quality of life growing up. Dad's always working or on the road. They'll both be fifty or older when the kids are in elementary school - they'll likely be retired and in their mid-late 60s before their kids graduate college.
I'll be 30 in two weeks and can't imagine myself getting married and having kids before 35. 40 is my absolute upper bound. Personally, I think having kids in your 40s, especially with both parents working, does a disservice to the kid.
She is so old now though, why couldn't she have completed the tour then taken care of her family planning?
Poor business sense and lack of caring about her fans. Makes her late in life mommy hood look that much more selfish.
The misogyny behind this and half the other comments on this thread is breathtaking.
Elton John was 63 when he welcomed his first child - which was publicly received with near-universal praise and joy. I don't recall anyone calling him "too old" or "selfish" to become a first-time father at such an advanced age.
Janet Jackson is 49, folks. Hardly doddering. And she has the money, support and (hopefully) wisdom to make this work.
Diane Keaton adopted 2 kids in her 50's (way before it became a thing) and she has long stated that doing so gave her renewed purpose and meaning (along with great joy) at an age when many women (including her own mother, about whom she wrote very movingly) start losing it.
Good grief, we get into such tizzies when women challenge the status quo on anything - whether it's equal pay, sexuality, or the age we decide to start a family.
Keaton, Madonna, Mirren. Judith Light. Jackson too, really - are trailblazers who are destroying the perception that women must bust out the stretchy pants and cut their hair and abandon all hope of a sexual life when they hit 50.
The idea will trickle down to mere mortals eventually - sooner (hopefully) or later.
Yes way up to 1 in 26 having any sort of birth defect. That is less than 4% chance. The rate of miscarriage is far more likely at nearly 33% than birth defect.
The risk of birth defects goes up percentage wise, yet. Less women over 40 have children than women in their 20s and thirties. However, it is worth noting that most children with down syndrome for example, are born to women under 35.
So, making this choice depending on what might or might not happen, or a numbers game, isn't necessarily a wise decision. Also, most women in America who find out their child has Down syndrome have chosen to continue with the pregnancy. Other birth defects can be more difficult to manage. And I think the risk of miscarriage in your state is not accurate.
I don't think 50 is the new 40 for motherhood. I think 50's are big outliers, but early 40's are not.
One thing I can say about having children at an older age (I was 36 and 39 when my kids were born) is like PP stated, it often means the children's relationships with their grandparents are truncated or less close than ideal due to the fact that the grandparents themselves are much older. Many of us had grandparents who were only in their 50's or even late 40's when we were born, whereas now, it's not uncommon for someone to become a grandparent when they are in their 60's or 70's.
True. We had our kids in our early 30s. They are in college now 18-22. I don't expect to have any grandchildren until my 60s. And who knows? I may never have them.
Having children a bit later is a whole lot better than unplanned teenage pregnancies, and children raising children.
There have been multiple threads about live in boyfriends abusing their girlfriend's children.
I am more tired of hearing about that, than an unusual case of a 49 year old celebrity having a baby.
And to answer the OP's question, NO - 50 will never become the new 40 when it comes to childbearing. The quantity of viable eggs is minuscule as one enters their mid 40s.
I am sure Ms. Jackson is using some form of assisted reproductive technology - most likely donor eggs.
The misogyny behind this and half the other comments on this thread is breathtaking.
Elton John was 63 when he welcomed his first child - which was publicly received with near-universal praise and joy. I don't recall anyone calling him "too old" or "selfish" to become a first-time father at such an advanced age.
Janet Jackson is 49, folks. Hardly doddering. And she has the money, support and (hopefully) wisdom to make this work.
Diane Keaton adopted 2 kids in her 50's (way before it became a thing) and she has long stated that doing so gave her renewed purpose and meaning (along with great joy) at an age when many women (including her own mother, about whom she wrote very movingly) start losing it.
Good grief, we get into such tizzies when women challenge the status quo on anything - whether it's equal pay, sexuality, or the age we decide to start a family.
Keaton, Madonna, Mirren. Judith Light. Jackson too, really - are trailblazers who are destroying the perception that women must bust out the stretchy pants and cut their hair and abandon all hope of a sexual life when they hit 50.
The idea will trickle down to mere mortals eventually - sooner (hopefully) or later.
Moderator cut: delete. Canceling a tour is a poor business decision. Finish what you started for your fans then do whatever you want, including dragging a kid on a tour or leaving a kid with others for weeks at a time while you tour. Selfish.
Last edited by Miss Blue; 04-12-2016 at 12:53 PM..
Reason: flame
I don't think 50 is the new 40 for motherhood. I think 50's are big outliers, but early 40's are not.
One thing I can say about having children at an older age (I was 36 and 39 when my kids were born) is like PP stated, it often means the children's relationships with their grandparents are truncated or less close than ideal due to the fact that the grandparents themselves are much older. Many of us had grandparents who were only in their 50's or even late 40's when we were born, whereas now, it's not uncommon for someone to become a grandparent when they are in their 60's or 70's.
My grandparents were in their 60s when I was born. I lost all of mine in college and shortly after. My parents were in their early 30s when they had me. I am in my late 30s. My friends are having kids now and in the last couple of years. It is interesting to think how this will impact things downstream.
How many in their 20s are financially secure enough to start a family these days?
That's what I mean. Society has the timing backwards. Once folks are in their 40s, conception rates go down, and the odds of pregnancy complications skyrockets. Genetic abnormalities are more prevalent in babies conceived by older parents (either an older mother, an older father, or both). People in their 20s are more physically capable of conceiving, carrying a pregnancy to term, and delivering a healthy baby.
My grandparents were in their 60s when I was born. I lost all of mine in college and shortly after. My parents were in their early 30s when they had me. I am in my late 30s. My friends are having kids now and in the last couple of years. It is interesting to think how this will impact things downstream.
My Dad was 50 when I was born. He's still going, in his early 90s. You never know how things will pan out. Two of his kids have predeceased him at this point.
The "sandwich generation" dynamic is the tough thing. I have to look after my elderly parents, and a lot of millennials will find themselves in that situation... in their 30s and starting families, while looking after elderly parents who have dementia, have gone deaf or blind, have mobility issues, multiple surgeries to replace knees and hips, etc. etc. etc. Loads of stress, now that people are having kids later in life, and then living longer.
I know a guy in his early 30s with a father that he just had to sign into an institution for dementia. His mother has multiple health conditions and can't look after herself, and just moved in with his brother... not how many people envision life in their 30s.
The risk of birth defects goes up percentage wise, yet. Less women over 40 have children than women in their 20s and thirties. However, it is worth noting that most children with down syndrome for example, are born to women under 35.
More and more fetuses with down syndrome are being aborted nowadays, few are actually born. That might skew that statistic.
I would imagine conversations like this thread were had back in the 60s-70s, judging women in their late 30s-40s to dare to have a kid. No wonder the articles title has "the NEW 40s". Like a glimpse into the abyss of righteous judgement from otherwise intelligent people, discussing what a person should/should not do.
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