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I think that you were kind to wait as long as you did. I wouldn't even bother to call the person running late, since they did not call or text when they knew they would be late to reschedule. I would be more inclined to send an email or text that has a time stamp, so they cannot have a revisionist attitude with respect to being late, since this situation involves a personal connection.
Life happens, but "breakfast with friends" is more important than career advice or perhaps getting your resume forwarded to someone hiring? In that situation, I would call the sibling to tell them that their friend's little snowflake stood me up, so that I would not get flak from them. It was horrendously rude of the mother to hang up on you, or to even call you with anything other than a profound apology for wasting your time.
I learned at an early age that there was never a problem when the best laid plans went awry, and you called or sent word that there was an unforeseen circumstance that caused a delay, before you were late. I worked for my parents at various times growing up, legal and medical practices, but the young lady's attitude was horrible. That's one reason why I politely decline mentoring or recommending someone for a position with someone I know, unless said person is devoted to their career choice and the recommendation will not reflect poorly upon me.
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All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages.
~William Shakespeare (As You Like It Act II, Scene VII)
This is one of those young people who is going to have to learn about life and working the the hard way. Evidently her breakfast with friends was more important than her meeting with you- good grief.
If this ever happens again with anyone you know, tell the mother that meetings cannot be set up through the parent. The kid has to call you directly and you can explain your expectations.
Good points.
I agree with some of the others who said that they would not have waited that long for the woman to arrive. I also agree that it was incredible rude for the mother to be upset at you and not her daughter.
The mother called me, an acquaintance of my sister. Her daughter had graduated in May and was having a hard time finding a job. So she asked me to talk to her, given how she majored in a related field. Mind you, I'm not hiring, but I might know someone who would be.
The mother calls me back, to set up the interview time and place. I knew I would be between meetings this morning, so I suggested a convenient coffee shop in transit.
The invitation hit my e-mail, duly put on my calendar.
I arrive five minutes early, order my coffee, and wait. And wait. And wait. Fifteen minutes after our appointed time, I call her. "Oh, I'm running behind. I'll be right there." And so I wait, and wait, and wait some more. Had this not been a daughter of my sister's friend, I would have packed up and left right then. Instead, I answered e-mails and made phone calls until she arrived.
She trickled in 45 minutes late in a huff. She forgot her resume. And when I pretty gently suggested that showing up 45 minutes late to a business appointment isn't how you get off on the right foot in life, she looked at me as if I has just said something disgusting to her.
"Well. Mom knew I was having breakfast with friends this morning." Said without any self-awareness whatsoever.
Because she was late and because I was going to another meeting, I had the fifteen minute chat, wished her good luck and left.
Five minutes later, I get a call from her mother, ticked off that I hadn't devoted much time to her daughter. I proceeded to tell her that not only was her daughter incredibly late, but wasn't prepared for the meeting. To that, she simply hung up. And I'll probably get read the riot act by my sister for not being 'helpful.'
Parents. If you are not teaching your children to be on time and be prepared, if you are doing things like working the phones to line up interviews for your children, then you are doing them a grave disservice in life. Also, if you never insist that your child have some kind of job in high school or college, then you are guaranteeing that they'll be missing some important experience when it comes time to enter the real world.
Okay. Rant over. Time for my next meeting.
Hmmm...so you tell us to quit making our children's lives easy but you attempted to do it for the children of people you kind of know.
My daughter is seven and she is expected to be grateful and considerate when somebody has done something nice for her. But if I can make her life easy, I would because she is my daughter.
It sounds like this daughter was not very grateful for your time or her mother's. That wouldn't fly in my house.
I have to wonder if this mother ever had a job outside the home. Her attitudes and actions toward both you and her daughter indicates a lack of any familiarity with professional behavior.
I just find this so bizarre. My parents never did any interview or appointment scheduling for me when I was job hunting. I mean they did drive me to the job interviews before I could drive myself, but they never even came into the store/restaurant/whatever with me. If they had a friend like you they would've passed your info onto me, after you said it was okay, and I'd have called you myself. And also, I wouldn't make breakfast plans that ran over into the meeting. I never make plans with people before an important meeting because you never know how that stuff goes and I don't want to be looking at my phone the whole time I'm with them with my mind somewhere else...I'd have rescheduled the plans for after the meeting or something.
[quote=elyn02;44807802]Hmmm...so you tell us to quit making our children's lives easy but you attempted to do it for the children of people you kind of know.
[quote]
Well she gave her the benefit of the doubt considering this was the first encounter. Nothing wrong with that.
Does she even want a job? Does she NEED a job? Does MOM need her to have a job?
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