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Old 05-12-2009, 08:51 AM
 
Location: Twin Cities
3,570 posts, read 7,777,499 times
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We've been having quite a few discipline sessions with our six year old son. Today when I was dropping him off at kindergarten we were talking and I was commenting about something and he said, "dad, you're annoying." I was shocked! I told him that was very rude of him to say. His reply? "Well you are annoying me".

That is only the latest in his repetoire of behavior problems. My wife and I are at a complete loss as our oldest daughter was never like this. We don't know how to deal with this behavior problem. We've been working diligently to nip this in the bud now but it doesn't seem to be working. Some people have said this is completely normal for a kid, but even if it's normal, it's still inappropriate behavior.

Any suggestions on how to handle his behavior? Outlets? I'm just unsure.

signed,
annoying dad
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:01 AM
 
Location: I think my user name clarifies that.
8,293 posts, read 22,461,476 times
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Our sons are both grown, and our daughter is about to fly the coop.

I wish I could give you some perfect answers here, but I can't. Our oldest son was almost too easy to raise. Our second son was almost too difficult. Part me of is very grateful that I didn't kill him in the all-too-often moments of pure anger. It was unbelievable, the mouth that boy had on him!

All 3 of our kids have distinctly different temperaments and personalities. We knew all along that we couldn't change those things - nor did we want to. The hard part has been trying to figure out how to guide each child correctly. What to squash and what to let slide.

Hang on though. Do your best not to respond in anger. Do your best to love on your kids, and express your love for them in multiple ways at all times. Remember that part of that love is firm discipline. You'll do fine.
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:04 AM
 
Location: Land of 10000 Lakes +
5,554 posts, read 5,867,984 times
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Don't get too excited about this. Over the years you're going to experience hurtful things your kids say so try to stay calm. That being said, just take him aside, calmly, and tell him that is not a kind thing to say and tell him to imagine how he would feel if someone said that to him. Having these conversations early in life rather than taking what kids say too seriously, should benefit both you and him.

Last edited by Aylalou; 05-12-2009 at 09:18 AM..
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:04 AM
 
Location: Denver area
21,140 posts, read 22,112,687 times
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I agree that it is normal and it is inappropriate. I would tell him it's perfectly OK for him to THINK you're annoying (we all think people are annoying now and then. You probably think HE is annoying from time to time) however, as he is getting to be a big boy, he needs to know that there are times and places for certain comments and indeed some comments are meant to be kept to onesself. I do think that kids will challenge the parent of the same sex more. Also, keep in mind that your daughter and your son are two different people and might need different parenting techniques at times. Good luck!
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:07 AM
 
48,519 posts, read 81,030,761 times
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If your anooying him that measn your actually doing your job of raising him. if he didn;t think so you probably would be.Not a easy for thinkfull job at that age.
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:16 AM
 
1,180 posts, read 2,426,814 times
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Im sorry, that seems like a very disrespectful thing for a child to say to any adult, much less a parent. I would have introduced him to my belt.

I would have also taken this chance to help him understand that in life, you can not just say what is on your mind to anyone, that annoying comment could cost him his freedom or worse if he cracked slick to the wrong person.
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:21 AM
 
370 posts, read 900,125 times
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My girlfriends nephew is starting to say the same things to his grandfather. It makes me want to spank him or something. Kids are being raised not knowing how to have respect for their elders/parents.

Spanking wont fix that,but punishment in some way (that is enforced) will.
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:22 AM
LML
 
Location: Wisconsin
7,109 posts, read 7,919,616 times
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I heard my grandson tell my daughter that she was "bugging" him. She just said; "Good, I'm doing my job then. Now quit kicking the ball and bring it in the house right now."
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:24 AM
 
370 posts, read 900,125 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by texdav View Post
If your anooying him that measn your actually doing your job of raising him. if he didn;t think so you probably would be.Not a easy for thinkfull job at that age.
Jeeze, spellcheck.


Also, if you are annoying him but he's TELLING you that, you need to do a better job Good luck, man
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:51 AM
 
363 posts, read 1,002,945 times
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You may ask your son what the word "annoying" means. Sometimes my six year old will say things to me and I don't think he fully understands the meaning of the words. I am not just talking about times when he is being sassy. Kids are like sponges at this age and pick up on so much. He may be exploring his words and may understand a bit of how to use words in a certain context but not fully understand the meaning. He may be picking up things..for example.....a parent may say "please go to your room if you are going to be annoying" or something like that.

That said...you may try "time outs" for this behavior or create some sort of reward chart for each day he goes with good behavior. If you use a chart...spin it positive...like..if you have good behavior for five days in a row than you will be able to do ____ or buy ____. Then change it to...if you have good behavior for seven days etc. etc.

Good luck. I feel your pain.
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