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This brought back memories. My children didnt' laugh when they were in time out. They would wail and cry like they were being tortured. Nothing was holding them in place, but they acted like they were glued to the time out step. I thought it was hillarious.
My kids didn't laugh, but time-outs gave them EXACTLY what they wanted: to be removed from the situation.
First of all I don't "hit" my kids. There is big difference between spanking and hitting. Spanking is done out of love and hitting is abuse
Second: I don't care about studies. If I do a study on 100 people about the effects of eating apples and 20% of those people commit a violent act. Then I could reasonably say apples make you violent.
Third: I know plenty of kids who are not the brightest that were spanked or not spanked. There was probably a 3 percent higher IQ in kids who were not spanked so "it must be the spanking" that made them dumber.
Fourth: Kids don't respect time outs. If I would have gotten time outs I would have been a holy terror
Fifth: I'm sick and tired of seeing parents like this poster "now billy please stop running around and bothering everyone else or i'm gonna give you a time out." "Billy, I said stop" "Billy, I said stop" "Billy, I said stop" "Billy, I said stop" "Billy, I said stop" "Billy, I said stop" "Billy, I said stop" Kids
No more to say as I know parents who dont spank their children probably have to get back to WE tv or Lifetime.
I am so with you on this one. I have no issues with spanking. I will spank my son when applicable. That time out s*** doesn't work!
My problem with these studies is two-fold:1. I think many of them are conducted by people who began the process with an anti-spanking bias and are trying to come up with something that will support their opinion. Murray Strauss, for example, has done many of these studies and he is absolutely 100% against spanking. I suspect this opinion predated his research.2. I don't think the studies break things down carefully enough. For example, my son was spanked perhaps 6 to 8 times during his entire childhood. I am sure there are whackjob parents out there who spank 6 to 8 times a week. If a kid is spanked 6 to 8 times a week it probably will make him more aggressive and dysfunctional. I suspect the abusive spankers who overdo it and spank quite frequently are lumped in there with people like me who used this punishment carefully and infrequently. Show me that the studies separate abusive parents from normal parents.Here's a real fly in this theory: Spanking was far more common when our parents grew up than when we did. If that is true, than our parents and their generation should easily be more aggressive, prone to committing crimes and violent acts, etc. than the present generation. The problem is the crime statistics don't bear that out.I consider myself open-minded to research. However, unless you can respond effectively to my objections, I'm inclined to treat this study as "junk science".
To me time out and spanking serve slightly different purposes.
When the kid has just lost it. Lost self control. Then time out to calm down and regain that self control.
When the person has done wrong, broken a rule or the law then they should be punished. That s where I feel that spanking / corporal punishment is a good option. Its quick, it hurts, if done when the parent is in control and is not extreme then it can get the message across.
Spanking teaches kids that it's ok to hit, and that you should hit others to teach them lessons.
Some random thoughts on the issue.
Not spanking teaches kids that they can do what they like. be rude. disrespectful.
When alternatives to spanking are discussed, things like time out, detention, and so on are promoted. Of course sitting on your own in a room thinking about your evil deeds isn't necessarilly mentally healthy but hey I don't have a sore back side and so thats gotta be good.
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I can't believe people are shocked or in denial when confronted with facts that it does increase aggression.
These days any agression is seen as bad.
A boy being a boy - lots of energy. cant sit still.
well its ok to medicate. drug him up in Ritalin.
Some agression is good. I sure hope our soliers are agressive.
It doesn`t increase agressive behavior... These studies are stupid and don`t prove anything except their own agenda. For centuries kids have been spanked and the older people that I`ve talked to are law abiding citizens and they were spanked.
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