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The notion that Black Americans (I strongly dislike the label "African" being used to apply to Americans who have no real immediate ties to African nations) have no culture is asinine. Black American culture is largely American.
I always find it hilarious when non Black Americans attempt to rebuke Black Americans. Sorry to say this, but if your culture was so great and your native homeland was worthwhile, you would be there.. not here.
I've visited several nations in West Africa and although I enjoy learning about their histories and way of life, it is simply not my background or culture and I don't believe in pretending that it is.
on the bold. I hope more and more black Americans come to this conclusion.
And I tell these same people the blue - those Africans of islanders who for some reason want to laude my country and culture. If theirs was so great, they wouldn't be here and their country wouldn't be the hell hole that it is that makes them and others want to flee. Black Americans don't leave our country, en masse. We are much more committed to communal uplift and working to better a situation (similar to what is even occurring in the thread) - this is something that is a part of black American culture.
That poster is serious and has a history of these same sorts of posts where he denigrates black people as a whole in America and thinks all Caribbean islanders and African immigrants are "better" than black Americans in nearly every way. It is hilarious to me but it is common amongst the attitudes of black immigrants unfortunately. It is one of the reasons why I never call myself an African American either.
Why does it matter if a woman decides not to date a blue collar worker? At the end of the day, each person has to determine what is in their own best interest. There is nothing wrong with a person deciding that they prefer dating non blue collar men.
Obviously, there are people who believe that blue collar guys are great.. and those women, should feel free to date them without trying to control other people's preferences.
Stating an opinion isn't trying to control other people.
IMO, not dating someone because of what they do for a living eliminates a lot of good quality men who are loving, caring, loyal and kind out of the picture. I also find it quite shallow.
The keyword is "their," as in, black women are entitled to determine what is important to them and they should not be criticized for doing so.
Obviously, there are many factors that people look for when selecting a potential mate. What I find is interesting is that black women are constantly told to lower their standards, no matter what they are. To be more specific, this is typically how it goes:
BW: I want to date/marry a man with a degree
Peanut gallery: A guy with a steady job should is good enough
BW: I want to date/marry a man who does not have any children
Peanut gallery: But he only has 1 child and doesn't pay child support
BW: I want to date/marry a man who doesn't have a criminal
Peanut gallery: He doesn't do that anymore - he's a changed man
In other words, whatever standard black women set for themselves, there will always be someone who says it is too high.
Quite honestly, I would say what I said about BCWs to a man or woman of any race.
Stating an opinion isn't trying to control other people.
IMO, not dating someone because of what they do for a living eliminates a lot of good quality men who are loving, caring, loyal and kind out of the picture. I also find it quite shallow.
I agree with this. But will point out that people do have to be compatible.
I shared earlier that I like primarily nerdy men and especially men who read a lot. My husband is a voracious reader like me. When I met him he was not a professional man though and was just starting out in life. He does have a college degree but he currently owns his own business and doesn't work a "professional" job. He is in a service oriented business.
When I was dating my only criteria was that he had to not have children (I don't want to deal with "baby mama drama"), he had to have a good sense of humor, he had to like to read, and he needed to be in a similar financial spot as I was myself (living on his own - not with mama, has his own vehicle, has a job, and has career/work goals he is working toward).
Other things were not as important. I like blue collar men. They know how to fix stuff lol. That comes in handy around the house. And there are many blue collar men who like to read and are funny and dependable guys. They are also down to earth and that is important to me too.
Ironically, I don't even like living in suburbia because I think people in 'the hood" are more down to earth and are just cool people and so I decided not to live in the burbs or in a richer neighborhood even though I can very much afford to.
I think it is hilarious the other poster stating that black people run off to live with white people. Most of the black people I know who are professionals move to "black meccas" and live in predominantly black, wealthier suburban districts and many of them do like I have done and move back to their old neighborhod. Even those that live in the richer black neighborhod volunteer a lot in their old neighborhoods or the poor black neighborhoods in the city that they live in. This is also a common part of black culture.
I agree with this. But will point out that people do have to be compatible.
I shared earlier that I like primarily nerdy men and especially men who read a lot. My husband is a voracious reader like me. When I met him he was not a professional man though and was just starting out in life. He does have a college degree but he currently owns his own business and doesn't work a "professional" job. He is in a service oriented business.
When I was dating my only criteria was that he had to not have children (I don't want to deal with "baby mama drama"), he had to have a good sense of humor, he had to like to read, and he needed to be in a similar financial spot as I was myself (living on his own - not with mama, has his own vehicle, has a job, and has career/work goals he is working toward).
Other things were not as important. I like blue collar men. They know how to fix stuff lol. That comes in handy around the house. And there are many blue collar men who like to read and are funny and dependable guys. They are also down to earth and that is important to me too.
Ironically, I don't even like living in suburbia because I think people in 'the hood" are more down to earth and are just cool people and so I decided not to live in the burbs or in a richer neighborhood even though I can very much afford to.
I think it is hilarious the other poster stating that black people run off to live with white people. Most of the black people I know who are professionals move to "black meccas" and live in predominantly black, wealthier suburban districts and many of them do like I have done and move back to their old neighborhod. Even those that live in the richer black neighborhod volunteer a lot in their old neighborhoods or the poor black neighborhoods in the city that they live in. This is also a common part of black culture.
I agree with you. Though my husband and I don't share many hobbies we do both like to read and enjoy discussing politics. He is an extremely intelligent man and I've learned a lot from him over the years. I agree with you that many blue collar men like to read, have a great sense of humor and are dependable. Those things describe my husband to a T.
On the same token, I'm sure there are many white collar men who fit this bill too. That's why I think women - of any race - do themselves a huge disservice when they limit their dating pool with something as inconsequential as the trade a man is in.
Personally I have never experienced anything severe but I am conscious of a few of these issues in our community. Most black men I meet (I'm also black) are kind to me. But I do notice little subtle issues. Like for example: I see no other race tearing each other down like people within the black community do. We are the first to jump on one another and clown one another. We talk about our hair and our skin tone the most. I've heard of a few black men degrading black women as well, I've just never experienced it personally. I notice that a lot of people in the black community like to blame our issues on other people when it's really mainly us causing our own problems.
I think we all need to look inward.
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on the bold. I hope more and more black Americans come to this conclusion.
Though my husband and I don't share many hobbies we do both like to read and enjoy discussing politics. He is an extremely intelligent man and I've learned a lot from him over the years. I agree with you that many blue collar men like to read, have a great sense of humor and are dependable. Those things describe my husband to a T. 
