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I'm really confused as to why I must give up my time to another in order to be able to eat, live, and clothe myself. I'm on this giant ball with a bunch of other monkeys...and one day I will not be here at all...my time is slowly passing me by, leading me to inevitable nothingness...and you think for one second I'm going to allow any person or any group of people dictate what I must do with my time? It doesn't make sense to me that I have to spend half of my waking life doing something I don't want to do...in a routine...or else I'll be relegated to the streets...hungry, dirty and cold.
Don't get me wrong...I can be a hard worker..but it's on my terms, doing what I want, and getting money because of it has never been the goal. I rather wake up and read...or visit friends and family...or spend time with my wife...or write...or try to solve a problem...or anticipate one...or come to a realization, learn something..or meditate. I even like to think on how to cure cancer, or eradicate homelessness, or eliminate poverty. That's what I like to do, but I like to do those things when and how I want to, and not have them as responsibilities tied to me not eating if I don't.
So explain it to me why I don't get to live the life I want to live.
I've almost killed myself because of this...being told how I must live my life, or else end up homeless, up hungry and cold. I just can't bring myself to not live every second of my life exactly how I want to and when backed into a corner, I've nearly ended it.
I'm 24. Degreed. Have a business. Internship experience. And working experience. So, I'm not lazy. Or maybe I am...
I just don't want to do something I don't want to do for the next 40 years of my life. I mean, I'm dying here...I need to live my life. It's the only chance I'll get to, and someone dare make it so that I can't?
I hate it. I've shown up to work with tears streaming from my face, I hate it so much.
Advice? Other than go to a shrink and swallow a bunch of happy pills? This is no life at all.
If you enjoy reading & writing & have a degree, then you could always write a novel.
if you want to help with homelessness or poverty as you said, then use those thoughts to consult for a non-profit or something along those lines?
I'm really confused as to why I must give up my time to another in order to be able to eat, live, and clothe myself. I'm on this giant ball with a bunch of other monkeys...and one day I will not be here at all...my time is slowly passing me by, leading me to inevitable nothingness...and you think for one second I'm going to allow any person or any group of people dictate what I must do with my time? It doesn't make sense to me that I have to spend half of my waking life doing something I don't want to do...in a routine...or else I'll be relegated to the streets...hungry, dirty and cold.
Don't get me wrong...I can be a hard worker..but it's on my terms, doing what I want, and getting money because of it has never been the goal. I rather wake up and read...or visit friends and family...or spend time with my wife...or write...or try to solve a problem...or anticipate one...or come to a realization, learn something..or meditate. I even like to think on how to cure cancer, or eradicate homelessness, or eliminate poverty. That's what I like to do, but I like to do those things when and how I want to, and not have them as responsibilities tied to me not eating if I don't.
So explain it to me why I don't get to live the life I want to live.
I've almost killed myself because of this...being told how I must live my life, or else end up homeless, up hungry and cold. I just can't bring myself to not live every second of my life exactly how I want to and when backed into a corner, I've nearly ended it.
I'm 24. Degreed. Have a business. Internship experience. And working experience. So, I'm not lazy. Or maybe I am...
I just don't want to do something I don't want to do for the next 40 years of my life. I mean, I'm dying here...I need to live my life. It's the only chance I'll get to, and someone dare make it so that I can't?
I hate it. I've shown up to work with tears streaming from my face, I hate it so much.
Advice? Other than go to a shrink and swallow a bunch of happy pills? This is no life at all.
Sounds like a First World Millennial Problem.
Your hardworking ancestors are facepalming from the grave.
I'll probably end up writing a book or two...idk maybe that doesn't count as contributing.
I also like thinking of ways to improve systems...social systems.
But I don't want to have to do these things. I don't care about money...I'm dead anyway. I just want to make sure my time on earth was utilized well. And I would have thought I get to make that determination? Is it not my place to decide how I get to spend my time?
And don't go on about how I do get to decide...because it's like in the godfather, you're making me an offer I can't refuse. It's still not fine.
Whatever. I'll put in my 40 years because that's my only choice, but how do I stop hating it?
At work, people ask me why I'm so quiet. It's because I hate it...and not that job specifically. I just hate not being able to spend my time how I want to.
You think it's bad now? Well, just wait until you get that wife, and then have kids.
do something you love, that way, you'll never have to work a day in your life.
i like drinking, but it is hard to find a way to get paid for that.
people always make "therapy" the go-to solution when someone behaves contrary to what they think. hell, who HASNT thought of suicide at one time or another? the first person to reply "not me" is a damned liar. pretty sure i attempted it more than once in vegas. never had therapy and i turned out quite all right. not much of a people person, but i can get myself to help others if they are deserving enough to be helped.
-most people want to be rich. not me
-most people want to fall in love and get married. not me
-most people eventually want to buy a house. not me
-most people follow trends to fit in and be "accepted". not me
just because it is the societal convention, doesnt mean you have to follow it
do something you love, that way, you'll never have to work a day in your life.
i like drinking, but it is hard to find a way to get paid for that.
people always make "therapy" the go-to solution when someone behaves contrary to what they think. hell, who HASNT thought of suicide at one time or another? the first person to reply "not me" is a damned liar. pretty sure i attempted it more than once in vegas. never had therapy and i turned out quite all right. not much of a people person, but i can get myself to help others if they are deserving enough to be helped.
-most people want to be rich. not me
-most people want to fall in love and get married. not me
-most people eventually want to buy a house. not me
-most people follow trends to fit in and be "accepted". not me
just because it is the societal convention, doesnt mean you have to follow it
Crying on your way to work every day is not ideal and usually means the person needs therapy.
It's great that you used those bootstraps. How about some useful advice for the OP??
02-03-2014, 11:05 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HokieFan
You think it's bad now? Well, just wait until you get that wife, and then have kids.
A wife and kids would probably make me give up all my dreams and work for them.
I went through a pregnancy scare with an ex girlfriend and I have never been so motivated to work in my life. I couldn't sit down for a week.
And it's only been a couple times I've cried..not daily.
There are plenty of things therapy cannot solve. I know of two very dear lives that were lost back when I was in high school, because people thought therapy was the answer.
Buddy, working to live and living to work is a reality for most of the people on this planet. It may suck, but it's the truth. Perhaps find a line of work that doesn't make you feel quite that terrible. Perhaps a residential care facility or a non-profit. Find an organization you can volunteer with on a regular - perhaps a weekly - basis. That way, you're enacting change in your own way by providing them with your time. You might even meet someone who shares the same passions you have. Maybe hop on a site like Meet Up and find a group that shares interests with you. Networking can lead to a job that might fit more of what you want to do. Til then, you may have to put time into something you don't love. Rather than sitting about, you might as well make money with your time until you figure out what it is you'd like to do. Best of luck and keep your chin up.
There are plenty of things therapy cannot solve. I know of two very dear lives that were lost back when I was in high school, because people thought therapy was the answer.
Therapy's never been a cure-all. It's a tool. Many people learn how to successfully use it and many don't. And if often takes a while to find the right therapist to guide you along its path.
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