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Ok, if a self-centered person finds what they're looking for, it's generally something self-destructive that is detrimental to themselves in some sort of way. At best, whatever they find doesn't benefit them in the long run. Self-centered people often look for pleasure, or something related to pleasure, not love, as love can only be found by being selfless. Therefore, even if they find what they think they're looking for (which is really just something to fill the hole in themselves that they have created), self-centered people will never truly be happy.
"Intellectual defeat." . The cognitive and emotional caliber of most of my detractors here is so stuntedly infantile that I demean myself by even engaging with them. And mind, I'm no genius. If this represents the general public, the future is more terrifyingly idiocratic than even I'd feared
I think he knew he had a problem and self preservation took over and he had to convince himself otherwise then things spiraled out of control. It wasn't about woman or virginity though.
I'll never believe this is "just a spoiled kid who wanted attention". That's what people tell themselves so they can sleep better at night. But monsters (mental illness) is real and we can't control it. I saw the videos too, to me it looked like he was just trying to act human, or at least the way his mind saw humans.
He was human. Somebody could have helped him, but all involved failed to understand the seriousness of the situation.
I just read the chilling transcripts from a video posted by the Santa Barbara killer. I was struck by how eerily similar his rhetoric is to some of the young guys who post here.[/url]
I noticed that, too. In fact, I think he DID post here, seriously! There was a guy complaining about being a virgin at 22, and also complaining about "stuck-up blondes", or something. Just like the Santa Barbara guy. And members asked him why he was fixating on blondes.
And btw, the thing about those "kissless virgins" is that they'd never approach a lot of the women out there, anyway. They tend not to go for plain or average girls.
From what I know, it doesn't seem like this guy had any guidance in his life.
It seems like his parents spent their whole lives throwing money at the guy when
he had a problem instead of talking to him and teaching him about life. Yeah I
know, he was 22 which means he was an adult. But just because someone is an
adult doesn't mean they don't need guidance and wisdom from those with more
experience especially someone who is in their early 20's.
What do you know?
Even this guys "manifesto" discusses family time, his parents getting him therapy, getting him involved in activities and family time even when he didn't want to be (ie: treating him like their child) and whatnot. Buying things for your kids =/= lack of guidance or anything else negative. We all buy our kids stuff, some of us just have more $ and buy better things. You can't guide mentally ill and one kid can not be the sole focus of your life FOREVER. I think they felt that he needed to find his own way at the age he was at, and not hide in his bedroom anymore, not knowing he was a danger to anyone but himself.
"Intellectual defeat." . The cognitive and emotional caliber of most of my detractors here is so stuntedly infantile that I demean myself by even engaging with them. And mind, I'm no genius. If this represents the general public, the future is more terrifyingly idiocratic than even I'd feared
You're the one acting like a petulant child because people are calling you on your BS, but go ahead and tell yourself whatever makes you feel better. While it won't be reality, I'm sure you can rationalize anything if you try hard enough.
Cecee, I think you're right. His parents probably thought it was time to kick the baby bird out of the nest. He went to two other community colleges before he moved to Santa Barbara; they must have been tearing their hair out trying to help him jump start his life. And from all outward indications, he was suicidal not homicidal. We can all Monday morning quarterback, but I wonder if his rage and angst would have been so apparent if we had seen the videos before his rampage?
"Intellectual defeat." . The cognitive and emotional caliber of most of my detractors here is so stuntedly infantile that I demean myself by even engaging with them. And mind, I'm no genius. If this represents the general public, the future is more terrifyingly idiocratic than even I'd feared
You don't even "engage" with anyone. You accuse them of being stupid without addressing the actual arguments they propose to you.
I'm not talking about the media or celebrities. I'm talking about people I see walking around every day--at work, at my daughter's school, at the grocery store, the mall, etc. What I see there are regular people--short, tall, fat, skinny, ugly, beautiful, skanky, prissy, casual, relaxed, macho, wimpy, tough, aloof, friendly--all of whom are making their way in the world and the vast majority of whom find mates if they want them.
I don't mean to be rude or snarky, but do you ever get off the computer, turn off the television, go outside and look around? The world I see every day does not reflect what the media is telling you. You are crippled by the notion that you are a victim and that there "aren't many good-looking nice girls," which is simply not true.
You identified the problem. Being too selective. If she's not good looking she's not worth having. She has to be good looking AND nice. Just nice won't do. How many women are removed from the pool if you take out the ones who are not considered good looking? If they are the only women men will consider, then you will have a disproportionate percentage of men going after one group of women while excluding another and the odds may not be in your favor.
I had to laugh at my dd yesterday. She's always lamenting that there are no good looking guys at her high school. She was proving her point by going through the seniors. She picked out a couple she thought were good looking and then added another and another and another.... saying things like "he's funny and that makes him good looking" and "he's nice so that makes him good looking". The pool you have to choose from gets very small if you make looks the number one criteria and you will have lots of competition for the available women in that pool.
The California killer wanted "Blond girls". He had picked one subset and was upset that he couldn't get them. Given his dark complexion, dark hair and dark eyes, I wonder if he could have attracted someone with similar characteristics. We have an unconscious tendency to be attracted to people like us or so different from us they are exotic. He seems to have eliminated girls who look like him from the selection pool. When you're too picky, it should come as no surprise that you cannot get what you want.
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. The cognitive and emotional caliber of most of my detractors here is so stuntedly infantile that I demean myself by even engaging with them. And mind, I'm no genius. If this represents the general public, the future is more terrifyingly idiocratic than even I'd feared
