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I will add that I believe city-data needs to weigh his priorities carefully. Sure, no one wants to be caught unawares by a surprise, unplanned pregnancy. So you take control by wearing a condom and using a back up method of BC. This works for the vast majority of people. But at some point, you have to be willing to buck up and take responsibility for unintended consequences like a surprise pregnancy. I think if someone wants a sexual relationship they should plan that pregnancy/baby may happen. JMO
Hysterectomy. A doctor can confirm she has no uterus. Problem solved.
One of my faves from The Office (Healthcare Episode):
Dwight Schrute: Number one: Inverted Penis.
Meredith: Could you mean vagina? Cause if you do, I want that covered.
Dwight Schrute: I thought your vagina was removed during your hysterectomy.
Meredith: A uterus is different from a vagina. I still have a vagina.
No, that's not what I'm saying at all. What I'm saying is this: if you have a friend with benefits, you don't care about them as dating material...you just view them as a friend to go to when you want sex. There is nothing wrong with being friends with your girlfriend. But if she's your girlfriend, that means you care about her as more than a friend.
You still seem to be stereotyping. Are you still implying that even nice guys don't care about their friends? "A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are." What is the difference between a girl friend with that attitude and a girlfriend or a wife with that attitude?
What is the difference between going out and having a good time with a friend versus dating? If you mean I don't have to play as many games with a girl friend versus a potential girlfriend, then you may have a point. However, why would a guy not want to go over to a girlfriends' place whenever he wants sex?
If she is a girlfriend usually means more obligation and more expectations. A girl friend should still expect some friendship even if she wants to go out with her other boy friends; there is also less jealousy involved as I would not want to "cramp" a girl friend's style; but be willing to help out and try to understand her past, believe in her future, and accept her the way she is.
If it is only about a long term, legally binding social contract, do they really want to be a friend?
I'm glad that you've decided to abstain. Too many men do whatever they want and then leave the girl to deal with the mess.
BTW, not everyone believes premarital sex is wrong.
They don't "leave the girl to deal with the mess"
It's not like the guy walks away scot-free. He has to give half his salary to her for 18 years. Sure, the girl might have to deal with raising the kid, but she gets money from the guy. And if the girl didn't want the baby, she could have given it up for adoption or got an abortion. People shouldn't mix morality and pregnancy. If you don't truly want a baby, get an abortion. Don't try to say you're too moral.
It's not like the guy walks away scot-free. He has to give half his salary to her for 18 years. Sure, the girl might have to deal with raising the kid, but she gets money from the guy. And if the girl didn't want the baby, she could have given it up for adoption or got an abortion. People shouldn't mix morality and pregnancy. If you don't truly want a baby, get an abortion. Don't try to say you're too moral.
Not everyone believes abortion is wrong.
Who is this "they" you are talking about? Are you disputing that a large number of men don't leave the girl to deal with the baby? I'll tell you point blank that is *exactly* what my son's sperm donor did after a two year relationship no less.
Half his salary? Really? Care to back this up with actual fact instead of misogynistic nonsense?
The burden lies with the woman no matter *what* she does. She can't not do anything. She must make a decision and whatever decision that is made puts the most stress on *her*.
Those who do believe abortion is wrong (politically, personally or both) should not be forced into having one.
The man still gets away with a lot less emotional stress than the woman. It will never be equal. So she gets a couple hundred (if that!) per month from the guy (maybe! lots don't pay!)...you really think that is a fair trade off of responsibility resulting from the same act that they both participated in?
You still seem to be stereotyping. Are you still implying that even nice guys don't care about their friends? "A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are." What is the difference between a girl friend with that attitude and a girlfriend or a wife with that attitude?
What is the difference between going out and having a good time with a friend versus dating? If you mean I don't have to play as many games with a girl friend versus a potential girlfriend, then you may have a point. However, why would a guy not want to go over to a girlfriends' place whenever he wants sex?
If she is a girlfriend usually means more obligation and more expectations. A girl friend should still expect some friendship even if she wants to go out with her other boy friends; there is also less jealousy involved as I would not want to "cramp" a girl friend's style; but be willing to help out and try to understand her past, believe in her future, and accept her the way she is.
If it is only about a long term, legally binding social contract, do they really want to be a friend?
I think you might be mixing me up with someone else. I never said nice guys don't care about their friends and I never used the saying "A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are."
Nice guys care about their friends. But they care about their girlfriend more...that's why they're more than friends.
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