Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
First of all, this thread is about 20-28 year olds. There is a big difference between a 20 year old and a 28 year old. The 20 year old is likely either in college (therefore unable to support themself) or can't afford to support themself because they didn't go to college so they can't get a good job.
The 28 year old is likely 6 years out of college. You would expect someone to be self-supporting by then.
If a 20 year old lives with their parents or is being supported by their parents, there is nothing wrong with that. If a 28 year old lives with their parents, then that might give you reason to wonder.
I'd say 22 is the earliest realistic age for people to support themselves. Each year after 22, it becomes less and less acceptable to live with/be supported by your parents.
Acceptable to whom?
We have very good friends who have been dating for four years. Each still live at home with their parents. (Our friends are in their late 20s) They both have college degrees (he has a master's) and professional jobs. In their families, the "children" stay home until they are married. No one who it actually affects has a problem with it. Why do others?
We have very good friends who have been dating for four years. Each still live at home with their parents. (Our friends are in their late 20s) They both have college degrees (he has a master's) and professional jobs. In their families, the "children" stay home until they are married. No one who it actually affects has a problem with it. Why do others?
I never said there's anything wrong with living at home at 28. I just said it might make people wonder. But there may very well be a good reason.
I never said there's anything wrong with living at home at 28. I just said it might make people wonder. But there may very well be a good reason.
When you live in a traditional Hispanic culture, no one wonders why a 28 year old lives at home whether they go to school or work but if they just hang out and do nothing, it does cause concern. As Magritte25 said, it is acceptable for young adults to live at home until they marry in some families.
I lived at home and I had a great emergency fund, started a IRA before graduating college (I finished college at 24 since I took some time off to solely work full time between a associates and bachelor's degree because I was unsure of a career direction).
As my parents put it, why should I struggle making it on my own when I still have their support (I still paid some rent) and save up for my future to be a little bit better than theirs? They treated me fairly and I was hardly at home since I was shuttling around to both school and work all the time. It was pretty much a bunker bed.
I married at 25 and my husband also lived at home with his mom when we were dating. After we married, we found our own apartment together. It didn't cause me concern, I didn't see him as less of a person to do so and encountered many guys my age who still lived at home. It would only be an issue unless he wasn't doing anything (whether work or school) and still lived with his parents. That doesn't look too encouraging.
This is part of the problem with American culture. Everything goes according to this dumb time line society created and the people are dumb enough to believe in it. No wonder we are the nation with the highest number of people depressed and we are one of the nation's with the highest rape, child molestations, drug use, etc.
People can't keep up. And it drives them to do dumb things. If we just became laid back and chilled up. The better we all would become. I don't see what is wrong with a 28 yr old living at. So long as he or she is doing chores and not mean with the parents.
Agreed! I meet people from other countries all the time and my parents are foreigners as well. All these foreigners tell me that in their country, people just stay at home until they're married, no matter how able they are to move out. The timeline thing is way too stressful to live up to. American culture puts way too much emphasis on when you must achieve something...its to put it bluntly, f*cked up. Everyone has their own pace of when they accomplish something and to be looked down on when you don't get there on time, is condescending and mean. If someone wants to live a horrible quality of life because they chose to move out before they're ready, that's fine and its your choice, but life is way too short to spend your best years not being able to enjoy it, especially if you're contributing to society in some way. The outright lazy people who don't do things at all with their lives who really are leeching off their parents, are the ones this thread should be addressing, in my opinion.
Over the past 5 years, I've come across people between the ages of 20 to 28 who still live with their parents. The most recent example being a young engineer recently hired at my place of work. He's 28 years old, making over $100K/year and still living with his parents. He may have student loans, but with his salary it's highly probable that he has the resources to be on his own and out of the nest.
In addition, I have discussed the issue of "self-reliance" with my own 20-something year olds and the child of a friend, who finds herself in a similar predicament. When I discussed leaving the nest with my 25 year old, she looked horrified by the thought of being on her own and burning the bridges which lead back to the nest. My friend's child has zero (0) intention of moving out anytime soon despite being a recently hired RN, with no student loans.
I'm a product of the 70's and have been on my own since the age of 19. I could not wait to leave the nest and be on my own. Due to my experience, and that of many of my peers, it's difficult to comprehend why so many young people today appear scared of being on their own.
So I ask to those of you within that age group. . .why are you so afraid of being self-reliant, independent, having the freedom to take risks, deal with failures, make tough decisions, without expecting to be bailed out or handheld by your parents?
i was on my own at age 23 and have been since. from age 18 to 23 i was away at college "on my own" for probably 80-90% of the calendar year. i love my parents but that house got a little too small after being out of it for college so i had no intention of ever living their "full-time" again. been on my own taking care of all my bills and issues for the last 7 years.
now unlike some i had / have the full-time professional job to make it possible and some sense of budgeting haha.
Ok, why don't I revise what I said: Just because an 18 year old could support themself in the 1950s doesn't mean they can today. Unless they happen to be a celebrity or have a lot of money for some reason. Or they have completely neglectful parents.
I supported myself in the 90's beginning at age 19. My younger brother is 19 right now supporting himself as a Subway Sandwich manager 300 miles from home. Neither of us enjoy(ed) the high life at such low wages, but we value independence more than toys 'n joys in my family.
(EDIT: NOT aimed at poster, just the current Young Adult generation in general)
This is a parenting thing...not an environment thing. If you can't do it, you are a looser, Plain and Simple. Your parents simply raised you to be a weiner.
Well if I didn't still live at home, then at the very least my dad would be paying a lot more for college. If I was completely self-reliant then I'd probably be living in pretty terrible conditions. A kid my age (19) with no vocational skills can basically only get low-paying service jobs. I'd be pulling my hair out trying to make ends meet. Whereas the way things are now, I can focus entirely on school, which means I can get a good job out of college and THEN I won't need to rely on my parents anymore. Why? Because I'll be making enough money to afford rent, food, gas and savings.
Over the past 5 years, I've come across people between the ages of 20 to 28 who still live with their parents. The most recent example being a young engineer recently hired at my place of work. He's 28 years old, making over $100K/year and still living with his parents. He may have student loans, but with his salary it's highly probable that he has the resources to be on his own and out of the nest.
In addition, I have discussed the issue of "self-reliance" with my own 20-something year olds and the child of a friend, who finds herself in a similar predicament. When I discussed leaving the nest with my 25 year old, she looked horrified by the thought of being on her own and burning the bridges which lead back to the nest. My friend's child has zero (0) intention of moving out anytime soon despite being a recently hired RN, with no student loans.
I'm a product of the 70's and have been on my own since the age of 19. I could not wait to leave the nest and be on my own. Due to my experience, and that of many of my peers, it's difficult to comprehend why so many young people today appear scared of being on their own.
So I ask to those of you within that age group. . .why are you so afraid of being self-reliant, independent, having the freedom to take risks, deal with failures, make tough decisions, without expecting to be bailed out or handheld by your parents?
^ That is a rare example. Many of the kids I know make 25K or LESS. That's less than $400 a week bring home after taxes. I look at the ones who live at home as smart myself. At least they don't rent a slum from a slumlord bastard with a dirt floor basement, raccoons, possums and other critters infested. Maybe a cockroach or two crawling across the kitchen counter. They aren't getting their electric and natural gas shut off and locked out for being behind. They aren't putting around in some chitty-chitty-bang-bang dilapidated auto that leaves a cloud of burning oil smoke behind wherever it rolls. All of that TO IMPRESS someone and be on their own! That's F"N" stupid if you ask me. Keep doing what you are doing kiddos!
^ That is a rare example. Many of the kids I know make 25K or LESS. That's less than $400 a week bring home after taxes. I look at the ones who live at home as smart myself. At least they don't rent a slum from a slumlord bastard with a dirt floor basement, raccoons, possums and other critters infested. Maybe a cockroach or two crawling across the kitchen counter. They aren't getting their electric and natural gas shut off and locked out for being behind. They aren't putting around in some chitty-chitty-bang-bang dilapidated auto that leaves a cloud of burning oil smoke behind wherever it rolls. All of that TO IMPRESS someone and be on their own! That's F"N" stupid if you ask me. Keep doing what you are doing kiddos!
Thank you!! I will be moved out in August...even while I"m still in college because I will be able to, not to impress anyone while living in a sh**hole.
Seriously. Let's say for a moment that you're making $10/hr at a supermarket. You work an 8 hour day, six days a week. You'd be making $1,920 a month before taxes. After taxes I believe it's around $20,000/year.
That is not very livable in DC. $10hr is a generous example too. If you can stay at home, you'd be stupid not to.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Keep doing what you are doing kiddos!
