Quote:
Originally Posted by smarterguy
I find this disconcerting. Man dates younger woman. No problem.
Woman dates younger man. Problem. WTF
|
People recapitulate endless reasons for existence of the double standard, but it's still a double-standard, thanks for calling it out as such.
Disparate judgments are made about a couple in which the man is older vs. couple in which the woman is older, yet both couples can be uncharitably painted with the broad brush dismissal of
"he/she is just using her/him"-for sex or for money.
Behind these lurk implicit beliefs such as "women lose status/attractiveness with age, men gain status/attractiveness with age".
Ageism crossed with sexism, as I see it-alas, those stigmas are the reality in our present culture. Questions such as "why would the younger person want to be with an older partner ?", or "why would an older partner want to be with a younger one ?" take on different flavor/attitude depending on whether the man or woman is the younger or older person.
In theory, one can state an age range they'd prefer for all sorts of reasons (and about which ones "should" matter, many people will argue). Once two people meet and feel mutual interest in each other as individuals, their respective chronological ages may quickly become secondary, an afterthought.
Which is not to say there won't be difficulties, as there can be in
any relationship, for all manner of reasons. One does wonder how much of those difficulties are due to other people giving the couple a hard time about their pairing (being suspicious, rightly or wrongly, of one or the other person's motives) vs. what proportion of the couple's problems are inherent to the people in the relationship being together (demographic/generational/stage of life reasons) ?
As for the notion of "maturity", in my opinion, it can have many meanings, like the word "smart". Everybody is "smart" at something or other, and everybody is "mature" in some way or other-it's not as if the world is clearly divided between those who are 100% and those who are 0% (in either "maturity" or "smarts" category)-people are varied & complex.
That was kinda' all over the place-my point is that no one is incorrect,
when speaking solely for their own selves...
Edit: To answer original post's query, I don't know how I'd feel, it doesn't happen to me. My reactions to online people are based on if they exhibit pushy/abrupt/crass behavior (manner of writing), rather than me drawing some conclusion due to their supposed age (or how that compares to my age).
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
