Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
it was definitely a dumb thing to say to a girl but to be honest when i'm in a situation like this with a girl i'm tempted to say distasteful "jokes" like this myself, just to get a rise out of her. yes I know it's not funny if you're the chic but some guys have a weird sense of humor (like me) even tho we're as harmless as fruit flies
So say you were out jogging around a track (boring but efficient), and you met this guy who was skating around the track, and you started chatting and the next thing you know it's a couple of hours later and he's nice so you give him your number and he calls and you set up a very casual first date.
And on that first date, you go to this very large park, and you walk around and have a nice talk and everything seems fine, and then it's getting dark so it's time to leave, and he starts laughing and says, "I could murder you out here and no one would ever know, ha ha ha."
So is this guy second date material or not?
(I hate to admit it, but this is a true story from when I was in grad school at Michigan ... he was a grad student too ... and what did I do? I laughed too, although inside of course I was totally creeped out, but I wanted him to think that I thought he was kidding, and I said, "Well I told my best friend who I was going out with tonight and where we were going, ha ha ha." And we both laughed again and he drove me home.)
Ah no. I'm surprised this question even has to be asked, unless you want to end up in a missing persons report, find a new "date".
I am totally embarrassed to admit this ... but there WAS a second date, and a third, and so on. We lasted a few months, then I realized he really was a total jerk (although hopefully not a murderous one) and we ended.
But honestly, every time I think back to that first date, I still get creeped out, all these years later!
I am totally embarrassed to admit this ... but there WAS a second date, and a third, and so on. We lasted a few months, then I realized he really was a total jerk (although hopefully not a murderous one) and we ended.
But honestly, every time I think back to that first date, I still get creeped out, all these years later!
Obviously he wasn't a murderer or you wouldn't have posted. Why did you go out with again? I am just curious. Did he make any more comments like that again?
I have an odd sense of humor, but his comment woud have touched a nerve with me. I have been a victim of a violent crime and am a little more sensitive to comments like that.
So say you were out jogging around a track (boring but efficient), and you met this guy who was skating around the track, and you started chatting and the next thing you know it's a couple of hours later and he's nice so you give him your number and he calls and you set up a very casual first date.
And on that first date, you go to this very large park, and you walk around and have a nice talk and everything seems fine, and then it's getting dark so it's time to leave, and he starts laughing and says, "I could murder you out here and no one would ever know, ha ha ha."
So is this guy second date material or not?
(I hate to admit it, but this is a true story from when I was in grad school at Michigan ... he was a grad student too ... and what did I do? I laughed too, although inside of course I was totally creeped out, but I wanted him to think that I thought he was kidding, and I said, "Well I told my best friend who I was going out with tonight and where we were going, ha ha ha." And we both laughed again and he drove me home.)
I would have said, "No, you couldn't. If you tried, you'd be saying hello to my little friend--after you got your vision back."
And I probably wouldn't have gone out with him again. I find that kind of humor off-putting.
Obviously he wasn't a murderer or you wouldn't have posted. Why did you go out with again? I am just curious. Did he make any more comments like that again?
I have an odd sense of humor, but his comment woud have touched a nerve with me. I have been a victim of a violent crime and am a little more sensitive to comments like that.
Honestly, we lasted as long as we did because he was a GREAT kisser. Yeah, I know that's shallow and all that, but kissing was and is very important to me in relationships, and it was hard to give up.
And no, he never made any other comments remotely like that one on the first date. I think it still creeps me out because I wasn't sure exactly where we were -- it was a large park in (or just outside of) Ann Arbor (but I don't think it was the Arboretum), and I had never been to it before and never went again, so it was a little scary, except that I kept telling myself he was only kidding.
And I do remember telling him later (weeks later, I think) that his first-date comment was really inappropriate, but he just laughed it off.
He really wasn't a very nice person, which is why we ended. Alas, even great kissing couldn't overcome that.
He really wasn't a very nice person, which is why we ended.
He was signaling you on the first date that he wasn't a nice person. That's what that comment was, a signal, though probably not a conscious one on his part. But people do give off clues. It's important to take one's discomfort seriously. And when you told him later that the comment made you uncomfortable, and he just laughed it off, he was communicating to you "I don't care what you think", and "I don't care if I creep you out". Signals.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Why did you go out with again? I am just curious. Did he make any more comments like that again?
