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Its because there is no congruency between what women say they want and what they actualy want. You know, sort of like young, attractive women always talk about "I just want a nice guy" or "why are all the good guys taken", yet they go on to completely ignore or freind zone single nice guys, while giving it up freely to losers and married men. THis is the very same reason that young men should not seek dating advice from women but rather from other men who are succesful in dating. Men do not suffer from this mental disease of not knowing what we want, or in fact saying one thing and doing the exact opposite. Men also dont think that hollywood is real world, and can tell a difference between reality and fantasy.
I can't speak for other women, but I personally couldn't tell you what I wanted because I wasn't looking for anything.
BUT what I could tell you was what I did not want. I didn't have "losers" for friends so why would I date one or want one as a partner?
Guess what is my husband? Italian!!!! Well there's some French too but he definitely does not have the douchebag swag or we won't even meet!
How would you know if he had the douchebag swag if you didn't meet him?
Unless you LITERALLY mean douchebag swag; in other words, the draping of a chain of douches around one's neck. If that's the case then I guess it would be pretty obvious that a guy had it. I just didn't realize it was something Italian men typically did. I learned something new today, thanks!
I knew what I wanted, an atheist or an absolutely non religious man, a man who was in touch with his feelings and could articulate them, a man who was funny, a man who had values, a man who treated others with respect and a man who understood that I am a complex person...OMG guess what I got?
My husband also had some well articulated wants, a woman who was intelligent, a woman who did not want children, someone who was understanding and caring and independent with a warped sense of humour...guess what he got? Yep, you got it, we both got want we wanted. Albeit we were not teenagers, he was 30 and I was 39, so we both had plenty of time to really think about what we wanted from a partner.
I can't speak for other women, but I personally couldn't tell you what I wanted because I wasn't looking for anything.
BUT what I could tell you was what I did not want. I didn't have "losers" for friends so why would I date one or want one as a partner?
But see, there is a whole world out there of some 7 billion other people. If you want an answer here it comes. A woman can be physicaly attracted to a man, whether he is a nice guy, bad boy, jerk or a loser, or anywhere in between. However, when a woman is physicaly attracted to a loser or a jerk, she immediately knows that he is not a LTR material, but more often than not will sleep with him right away to satisfy her desires. Guys who happen to be LTR material, are made to wait 90 days, 10 dates or whatever other nonsensical rules are enforced by women for sex, because she doesnt want him to see her as a loose woman. SO this guy ends up walking around with blue balls for 90 days, while she is shagging every jerk that mistreats her. From a mans perspective, it is much better to not be LTR type of guy,because this way you can get laid easily and move on to the next one the very next day.
I don't know any woman who wants a bad guy except women with low self esteem.
Except, it doesnt really matter to guys who are only looking to get laid. Newsflash, most men want to get laid and they want to get laid now. Thus, whether she has low or high self esteem is completely ignored, she only needs to be beautiful/sexy and for some guys only willing.
But see, there is a whole world out there of some 7 billion other people. If you want an answer here it comes. A woman can be physicaly attracted to a man, whether he is a nice guy, bad boy, jerk or a loser, or anywhere in between. However, when a woman is physicaly attracted to a loser or a jerk, she immediately knows that he is not a LTR material, but more often than not will sleep with him right away to satisfy her desires. Guys who happen to be LTR material, are made to wait 90 days, 10 dates or whatever other nonsensical rules are enforced by women for sex, because she doesnt want him to see her as a loose woman. SO this guy ends up walking around with blue balls for 90 days, while she is shagging every jerk that mistreats her. From a mans perspective, it is much better to not be LTR type of guy,because this way you can get laid easily and move on to the next one the very next day.
No sh*t, but for some reason you seem to think only your theories apply to the 7 billion men & women out there.
Not all men think like you and not all women think like the women you shag/shagged.
No sh*t, but for some reason you seem to think only your theories apply to the 7 billion men & women out there.
Not all men think like you and not all women think like the women you shag/shagged.
If more men thoguht like me, they could have countless potential partners to choose from, and get laid whenever they felt like it. Sounds terrible, I know. Nothing personal here, but many times when I post or talk to women, they reply "well I...." or "in my case...." as if they were the only person walking this earth. There isnt a single statement that can be made about ALL men or about ALL women, so when i say women or when i say men, of course it means i speak of some men and some women. Most of the time it applies to vast majority however.
He didn't introduce you beforehand? He didn't invite his sister or family to the wedding? He doesn't see his kid? Whatever works for you, but I'm beginning to see a pattern here.
I met her and 2 of his brothers before we got married. We married in court only, for now. He said we will have a proper wedding. We actually kind of eloped. He is the one who only met my family AFTER our wedding. Though my family knew we were getting married, his family didn't.. None of our families are there on our court wedding but they will ALL be present, we hope, on our wedding celebration party in April!
I actually talked to his sis yesterday about the son situation and she confirmed his ex was really nasty. She did tell me though that he likes kids and he was the one who took care of his son when he was a baby when they were still married.
Last edited by angelinajolie; 02-09-2013 at 07:26 AM..
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