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I am a 22 year old girl and even though people tell me I'm pretty, men look at me quite a bit and I get hit on, I never had a real bf and I am still a virgin. I've had occasions in the past but I just never did anything about it because I don't want my first time to be with someone that I either don't truly love or that I love but doesn't really love me... I don't want it to be a casual hook up either. I'm quite shy I must admit, it can take me a bit of time to feel really comfortable with a guy, and I'm also not a girly-girl who falls in love every 2 months and within a few days. Even when I'm attracted and troubled by a guy, I need to take the time to get to know him, to become friend with him, to discover the small details that distinguishes him from the others to develop solid romantic feelings and be able to start a relationship. I think time, a bit of longing, make the feelings way more intense, so why sleeping with a charming guy you've met very recently when you could wait a few weeks or more and make all the sensations way stronger ? I am not religious at all, just romantic, maybe a bit too much, but I just want my first time to be with someone special to whom I will also be special. Anyways, I'm now 22 and getting a bit tired of waiting for love... am I being too idealistic and romantic, should I just stop making a big deal about this and go for a guy I'm not necessarily that thrilled about ? I don't want to... but I'm also a bit worried about what would a guy I like and date think of me still being a virgin.
What would you guys think if you'd meet a girl from my age, kind of like her and start dating her, and discover she is still a virgin ? How would you react ? Would it be a turn-off, or would you be glad she wants to give it to you ? Thanks in advance !
I would have no issue with you being a virgin. That said, I would not marry a virgin. I must have a good feeling about what our sex life will be like before I would commit to marriage.
22 is more or less OK for being a virgin. It is a bit on the late side but not too bad for I assume a reserved, quite person. But if I were in my late 20th and were dating the OP, I don't think it would be a positive. Being a virgin can potentially mean a lot of drama, stress if and when we try to become intimate. And who knows if the relationship even lasts after that. Since she never had sex in your life, she has no frame of reference and potentially can find me repulsive in bed...
I would have no issue with you being a virgin. That said, I would not marry a virgin. I must have a good feeling about what our sex life will be like before I would commit to marriage.
This right here is it. If anything being a virgin ensures a lack of STDs
I think I was 26 the last time I dated a virgin. I ended it after a month or so. She had far too many hangups and illusions about how relationships actually work. It wasn't the virgin part that was the issue. It was the complete lack of any kind of relationship experience.
You sound completely normal for your self described type of personality. Absolutely fine and quite desirable to some segments of male population with desire to marry and have family.
I would suggest reading Ann Hooper's: Ultimate Guide to Sexual Touch, The Ultimate Sex book and abridged Kama Sutra as education material, so when you do engage in sexual relations it isn't awkward and you can be confident.
Obviously, it's not a topic that most will talk about before knowing someone they are interested in for a reasonable amount of time. What that threshold of time is, will vary amongst your peers for a myriad of possible reasons. If someone pressures you don't waste time with them. Go at your own speed. Have the confidence to not care what others think and you'll be miles ahead in life outlook.
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