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Right, but I'd imagine the kind of person who'd sleep with a guy who thinks her only worth is in dispensing sex as quickly as possible has some issues. Maybe not, though. Life's a rich tapestry.
What if she wants to have some fun sex, too? What if she doesn't want a relationship?
Second best lover I ever had, I went for it pretty quick. Went home with him after our first date. I did not feel like a commodity or that I was being used...even though he said he was not in this for a relationship, just good conversation and sex once in a while...because I was also getting a superior sexual experience out of it. Men aren't the only ones necessarily who enjoy sex.
I admit that the odds are against someone being as good as he was, but I have no regrets at all over it, nor do I think it affected my "quality" as a human being, a woman, or a partner.
Just gets annoying, the notion that a woman's morals are all about how she guards access to her ladyparts.
The only thing that bugged me about that fling with that dude, is that he wanted to end it sooner than I did. We could have easily hashed out whatever boundaries and rules he wanted and kept right on being FBs or FWB but he was afraid if he let it go on long enough I'd start picking out china patterns or something.
No need to slink. No harm, no foul. Mere curiosity on my part after reading many posts in many threads.
Neither satisfied nor dissatisfied. I was simply curious. No crime in that. The curse of an idle mind suffering from the loss of someone with whom I could always engage in constructive and intelligent discourse.
Yeah, keeping the mind engaged with other people, even if it's on the web and having some dialog most certainly can be some relief and get one's mind into other places, even if it's just for a short time.
Right, but I'd imagine the kind of person who'd sleep with a guy who thinks her only worth is in dispensing sex as quickly as possible has some issues. Maybe not, though. Life's a rich tapestry.
That's kind of what my point was in the thread about the guy with the girl that wanted to move slow.
I'm so confused by the different follow which way the wind blows, flip flopping versions of feminism I see on here. The way I understood it was I thought women weren't to be viewed as only good for sex and popping out babies.
obviously if a guy is shaming a woman after a week for not putting out then sex is the main value he's placing on her.
I don't see where how much she likes sex is really relevant we're not talking about what she wants we're talking about what he wants by a certain deadline. I can't put my finger on how modern era feminism would support that mentality.
That's kind of what my point was in the thread about the guy with the girl that wanted to move slow.
I'm so confused by the different follow which way the wind blows, flip flopping versions of feminism I see on here. The way I understood it was I thought women weren't to be viewed as only good for sex and popping out babies.
obviously if a guy is shaming a woman after a week for not putting out then sex is the main value he's placing on her.
I don't see where how much she likes sex is really relevant we're not talking about what she wants we're talking about what he wants by a certain deadline. I can't put my finger on how modern era feminism would support that mentality.
We all don't have everything figured out, we are works in progress and we learn as we go. I'm a feminist with very sexually conservative views that are not in step with popular culture. I came about my personal views through trial and error and by making a lot of mistakes and with self-reflection. We are all individuals, with different perspectives and values, that's what you need to keep in mind.
Do what works for you, treat others with respect and recognize that what works for you may not work for others. We are all on our own journey. Even feminists!
And the men who drop women who don't "put out" by a certain date will not have that same viewpoint several years from now. They are on a learning curve too.
Well I hope we managed to clear things up for you. If you're still not convinced, why not ask your own children and grandchildren for their perspective? You'll get an answer more tailored to your particular socioeconomic and geographic community.
Oops! I forgot an adult granddaughter, early 20s, in Texas. She's a bit over 400 miles away. Two sons, two daughters-in-law and four grandchildren live 750 miles away and all the rest live 2,000 miles away. Now, I'm the only one in the Ozarks so geography doesn't favor me.
I believe my question has been answered and I appreciate those who responded with civility and maturity.
PS. You'll never convince me that chivalry is dead, or should be!
Last edited by Curmudgeon; 09-01-2017 at 06:46 PM..
I'm so confused by the different follow which way the wind blows, flip flopping versions of feminism I see on here.
Feminism, like any movement or philosophy, encompasses a wide diversity of thought, and of course not all people who consider themselves feminists think alike. Not by a stretch.
I probably shouldn't speak to it, but I always felt feminism is, at its base, humanism, and that its most fundamental tenets are choice and self-direction.
What if she wants to have some fun sex, too? What if she doesn't want a relationship?
Second best lover I ever had, I went for it pretty quick. Went home with him after our first date. I did not feel like a commodity or that I was being used...even though he said he was not in this for a relationship, just good conversation and sex once in a while...because I was also getting a superior sexual experience out of it. Men aren't the only ones necessarily who enjoy sex.
I admit that the odds are against someone being as good as he was, but I have no regrets at all over it, nor do I think it affected my "quality" as a human being, a woman, or a partner.
Just gets annoying, the notion that a woman's morals are all about how she guards access to her ladyparts.
The only thing that bugged me about that fling with that dude, is that he wanted to end it sooner than I did. We could have easily hashed out whatever boundaries and rules he wanted and kept right on being FBs or FWB but he was afraid if he let it go on long enough I'd start picking out china patterns or something.
I believe we were talking about not devaluing women that don't put out, not devaluing women that do put out. That would be two different discussions, yes/no? If a guy didn't devalue a woman for not putting out how is that bad? That would seem honorable to me.
I think time is important. Travel for my career has become more frequent this year, so I've haven't had an opportunity to develop a legitimate romance since my previous relationship ended. I think it would be unfair to initiate a new relationship until I become more available.
Reading posts on relevant forums here I really have to wonder. Those are beginning to sound like archaic and forgotten terms, especially in younger generations. I'm 71 by the way.
What say all of you? I'll hunker down and wait.
I have regular one-night stands and many of them have been exceptional, but I still value romance more. Time is the most significant problem for me.
Since my previous relationship ended, I haven't had enough opportunities to develop a legitimate romance. My career has required me to travel more frequently this year. I've probably slept in hotels more often than at home.
A woman I want a relationship with deserves my commitment, so I'm not going to pursue a relationship until I become more available.
So you should know. Do they form meaningful relationships or do your kids and grandkids "hook up" and sleep around?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Curmudgeon
I know nine, in fact, five children and two stepchildren ranging in age from 28 to 47 and two grandchildren in their early 20s.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrowningPoeFrost
You gotta love these forums. People feel bold enough to ask rhetorical questions that they would NEVER say if that person were actually standing in front of them.
And since when do parents and grandparents of adult children and grandchildren ages in their 20's to 50 know whether these adult children and grandchildren are hooking up in their personal lives???
Last edited by matisse12; 09-18-2017 at 03:19 AM..
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