Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I can compartmentalize, and then after I ended it, because he started getting weird about who I talk to at work, I had two years of stalking in the workplace. Very stressful! That ended up with him being walked out by the police, and me having them at my front door "just in case".
My point was just because she doesn't need this particular job doesn't mean she'll never need another job. Word of Mouth travels whether or not it's the law on what information an employer can give for references. People still find out, and if you are a troublemaker, or caused a scene, or did anything that resulted in you being not a very good employee --then that follows you. Which is what I meant about foresight.
Professionals can compartmentalize, they should also be intelligent enough to know when not to throw caution to the wind for "butterflies".
I'm not talking about absolutes-- you're speaking from your experience I'm speaking from my experience.
I'm sorry that happened to you. That sounds awful.
The reality, though, is that could have happened to you in any relationship, no matter where it started. I understand that because it's your place of employment, it adds a really horrible dynamic to the mix. I also understand how that would cause you to advise against any office romance whatsoever.
Yes, we're both coming to this topic with our beliefs shaped by our specific experiences. However, very few here initially came to the table saying, "I personally had a bad experience with an office romance, so I would advise against it due to my experience." Instead, most simply basically said, "Don't do it. It's stupid and immature." It's only after some back and forth that posters have brought their own experiences in. That's great, and I love to hear them. However, biases should probably be brought forth earlier so other posters know how to frame those posters' responses. If I go to a restaurant which 10 of my friends hate, but I have a great experience, I would tell people, "Most people seem to hate it but I had a great experience there," instead of, "Oh, it's great."
As to word of mouth, I personally don't believe it is as big of an issue as many here on C-D espouse. Additionally, while I'm generally a pretty low risk guy myself in my own decisions, if I really liked someone the idea of affecting some hypothetical job I may need at some point in the indeterminate future would probably be the furthest thing from my mind.
Not being against company policy=/=Has potential for complications.
Agreed, but that isnt what OP said. Twice she used the word inappropriate to describe dating her boss, while claiming its perfectly fine at this company. All in the same post.
The overwhelmingly prevailing thought here is that office romances are taboo. No ifs, ands, or buts.
Taboo is a strong word that I would not agree with. I think most agree that romances between people who work together and see each other every day are risky and should really be avoided. I don't see a problem with dating other employees of the same company that you don't see every day, don't work together and don't have the same manager.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
