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Well, you never really gave her a chance to use you..... you just gave her everything. /shrug
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When I ask her how her job hunt is going she gets defensive. Yet she has asked me to buy her new clothes and such. We still do things together, including sex which is pretty good I wont lie, I still feel as if she is taking advantage of me.
She's comfortable. No bills, and she likes it that way. You'll have to say something along the lines of that you wanted to boost her up from where she was at before, but you aren't intending to be her sole support. I guess you'll have to define it. For instance maybe you don't mind if she doesn't pay bills, but clothes and other personal things are on her.
For starters, I am 44 and my girlfriend is 25. And have been together for 10 months. We met online and at first everything was great, we did fun activities together, had great conversations, had great chemistry, etc etc. She moved in with me and things were fine... At first.
I have helped her with some things, some of which many may consider excessive. For example, her car was having some bad engine trouble so I bought her a new car, she didn't have much so I have bought her some clothes, jewelry, etc. I have also helped pay her tuition as she is trying to get a veterinary degree and since she had a crappy phone that was bad and constantly had problems, I bought her the new iPhone X. She always seemed appreciative of it all. But three weeks ago she got fired from her wal mart job, for not coming in and had used all her sick days.
She has said she has been looking but I haven't seen her go to any interviews or anything like that and she keeps telling me that she is still looking. Meanwhile she spends most of her time on her phone, talking with friends, watching youtube/Netflix etc.
When I ask her how her job hunt is going she gets defensive. Yet she has asked me to buy her new clothes and such. We still do things together, including sex which is pretty good I wont lie, I still feel as if she is taking advantage of me.
She IS taking advantage of you!!Get rid of her..not because she's not working BUT because she REFUSES to look for a job AND she gets defensive when you bring it up.She doesn't seem like she even wants to work but to just lay around the house doing nothing much but mooching off of you because you are allowing it.
Get rid of her because this will get worse!!
Please tell me this is a fake post. You're getting PLAYED. She's using her.......lady parts to cloud your judgement. MOst 25 year old women do not want to date men that old. It's usually for him to buy her nice things. You buy her a new car, you buy her a new phone, jewelry, pay for her tuition. ****, I would date you and i'm a hetersexual male!!!!
True most would not but 44 year old males can be very sexy and very enticing.
He did mention she came from a very dysfunctional upbringing and this can set her apart from her peers and cause her to be attracted to an older male. Perhaps she subconsciously views him as a father figure that she never had and keeps that part separate from her romantic relationship with him...that is if it's even romantic and just not purely sexual in nature.
Since the OP won't give me the time of day with respect to answering my questions we can only speculate and to me that's a waste of time.
OP can you please answer my questions? I am not here to chew you up and spit you out for whatever answers you provide.
Is she still attending classes?
How does she treat you on a daily basis?
Does she seem truly happy to see you when you come home?
Does she want to engage with you as a romantic partner?
Does she clean or help with the cooking or any house chores?
Do you see patterns of behavior that indicate she's still affected by her dysfunctional upbringing?
For starters, I am 44 and my girlfriend is 25. And have been together for 10 months. We met online and at first everything was great, we did fun activities together, had great conversations, had great chemistry, etc etc. She moved in with me and things were fine... At first.
I have helped her with some things, some of which many may consider excessive. For example, her car was having some bad engine trouble so I bought her a new car, she didn't have much so I have bought her some clothes, jewelry, etc. I have also helped pay her tuition as she is trying to get a veterinary degree and since she had a crappy phone that was bad and constantly had problems, I bought her the new iPhone X. She always seemed appreciative of it all. But three weeks ago she got fired from her wal mart job, for not coming in and had used all her sick days.
She has said she has been looking but I haven't seen her go to any interviews or anything like that and she keeps telling me that she is still looking. Meanwhile she spends most of her time on her phone, talking with friends, watching youtube/Netflix etc.
When I ask her how her job hunt is going she gets defensive. Yet she has asked me to buy her new clothes and such. We still do things together, including sex which is pretty good I wont lie, I still feel as if she is taking advantage of me.
All in all she's taking advantage of you and you're allowing it. Don't get butthurt, you're 44 and should know what's going on here. Maybe you need to work on your self control and ego along with your dignity. Seems that way to me.
True most would not but 44 year old males can be very sexy and very enticing.
He did mention she came from a very dysfunctional upbringing and this can set her apart from her peers and cause her to be attracted to an older male. Perhaps she subconsciously views him as a father figure that she never had and keeps that part separate from her romantic relationship with him...that is if it's even romantic and just not purely sexual in nature.
Since the OP won't give me the time of day with respect to answering my questions we can only speculate and to me that's a waste of time.
OP can you please answer my questions? I am not here to chew you up and spit you out for whatever answers you provide.
[*]Is she still attending classes?
How does she treat you on a daily basis?
Does she seem truly happy to see you when you come home?
Does she want to engage with you as a romantic partner?
Does she clean or help with the cooking or any house chores?
Do you see patterns of behavior that indicate she's still affected by her dysfunctional upbringing?
Yeah, or perhaps she was not-so-subconsciously fishing for someone like the OP, on the internet.
I'd like to know if she was ever attending classes, or even enrolled in a vet program, anywhere.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Scrat335;
All in all she's taking advantage of you and you're allowing it. Don't get butthurt, you're 44 and should know what's going on here. Maybe you need to work on your self control and ego along with your dignity. Seems that way to me.
He's not "allowing" it, as if she started it. He volunteered for it; he set the tone of the relationship, himself. Or so he tells us, anyway. Who knows; maybe she kicked the whole thing off by complaining strategically about her car, then her phone, being unreliable, or the car chronically needing repairs, or something. Maybe this is how she supports herself. She sure doesn't support herself by working at Wal-Mart. They don't even guarantee their cashiers full-time work. They cut back their hours with no notice, from time to time.
I'm curious as to whether the daughters ever got a new car gifted to them by their dad. How can the daughters get some of that generosity action? Or has their dad advised them to find their own sugar daddies?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rassnon
They already have jobs and are doing well. My daughters and son have met her and while my son doesn't really care, my daughters have shown great displeasure even my oldest saying it was "gross".
Yep, that figures. Your own biological daughters & son, who you SHOULD be spending your $$ on, had to work hard to get their cars & other things, but this lady stranger (whether you've known her for a short time or longer) who was "living in poverty, etc." as she says, literally gets a free ride from you. Duh, of course, your adult kids aren't liking this.
These old geysers do this kind of thing all the time. If it were up to me, all these young gals out there wouldn't be able to hunt down sugar daddies like you anymore & (gasp!) have to work hard like the rest of us.
As they say, "there's no fool like an old fool" & you're definitely one of them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by softcrunch
Lol. I bet if the GF was a 40yo woman who also didn't have much, OP would not be as readily to buy her stuffs like he did with this 25yo...
Agree 200%! He doesn't want to lose this "hot young thing". Once again as I already said in here, I wish men would all stop thinking that just because a woman's older, doesn't mean she's better.
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Your own biological daughters & son, who you SHOULD be spending your $$ on, had to work hard to get their cars & other things, but this lady stranger (whether you've known her for a short time or longer) who was "living in poverty, etc." as she says, literally gets a free ride from you. Duh, of course, your adult kids aren't liking this. 
