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The DINKs I know do have the money for vacations and clothes and stuff.
Yes, that is one of the advantages. Being able to take off at the drop of a hat and not worry about school schedules and such. I've surprised my wife with a weekend trip to London for Valentine's Day, another weekend trip to Paris, and a birthday trip to Nice & Monaco. We also took the entire month of January off from work earlier this year for a 30-day cruise to Tahiti, Bora Bora & Hawaii. In fact, we've pretty much traveled all over the world over the past 20 years. Since we don't have kids, the only thing that has constrained us has been the amount of time we can take off from work. That is why I am so looking forward to retirement in the not-too-distant future, when we can travel to our heart's content.
Nope. No regrets here. I have a wonderful wife whom I love and who loves me. I couldn't be happier with my life (unless I was eligible to retire tomorrow!).
Yes, that is one of the advantages. Being able to take off at the drop of a hat and not worry about school schedules and such. I've surprised my wife with a weekend trip to London for Valentine's Day, another weekend trip to Paris, and a birthday trip to Nice & Monaco. We also took the entire month of January off from work earlier this year for a 30-day cruise to Tahiti, Bora Bora & Hawaii. In fact, we've pretty much traveled all over the world over the past 20 years. Since we don't have kids, the only thing that has constrained us has been the amount of time we can take off from work. That is why I am so looking forward to retirement in the not-too-distant future, when we can travel to our heart's content.
Nope. No regrets here. I have a wonderful wife whom I love and who loves me. I couldn't be happier with my life (unless I was eligible to retire tomorrow!).
Um, don't you have to arrange it so you can both take vacations at the same time? Whereas if only one person worked, the other person would be available anytime?
Um, don't you have to arrange it so you can both take vacations at the same time? Whereas if only one person worked, the other person would be available anytime?
Fortunately, that hasn't been an issue. I am in charge of my own program so I can pretty much take time off whenever I want. My wife's employment has been more structured and she doesn't get near the amount of paid vacation time that I do; however, she can take as much unpaid time off as she wants. For example, when we took the month of January off (5 weeks actually), she took one week vacation and a 4 week unpaid leave of absence. That's another advantage of being DINKs. Although we have a double income stream, only one is necessary.
Yes, that is one of the advantages. Being able to take off at the drop of a hat and not worry about school schedules and such. .... I couldn't be happier with my life (unless I was eligible to retire tomorrow!).
Ditto. We were able to avoid the summer throngs and take vacations and such when school was in-session. We had the roads and resorts to ourselves, and often just after Labor Day the rates went down but the weather was still fine, especially the Mid-Atlantic coastal areas. The Florida Keys in mid-November was also a great time to visit, great weather, no high-season rates, and no spring break crap.
On a more day-to-day level, we could catch movies right after work, get matinee prices, avoid rush hour traffic, eat a decent meal and drive home after the worst of DC/Fairfax County traffic abated. We went out to eat or shop on weeknights and stayed home or did other things on weekends. On the other side of the coin, the vast majority of people with children were locked in to daycare and/or school schedules, had to run home asap, and had to do most things like shopping, movies, or dining out on weekends. While it seems the whole world goes to the movies on Saturday nights, we were off doing something else, or nothing at all, never fighting the crowds.
Being DINKS isn't for everyone. Those who sincerely DO want children should pursue it with all due vigor, but those who aren't sure should wait until they are sure. Never force the issue by having a child just to see what it's like, or because all the friends are having kids, or because the elder generation wants to be grandparents. People have to live their OWN lives and not be swayed by anything other than their own well thought out wishes and a solid understanding of the lifetime commitment required to be good parents; commitments to financial, time, emotional and legal ties that bind.
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It sounds like a pretty nice situation to me. I think it is a likely result for myself, assuming I do marry at all, though I'm not totally foreclosed to the idea of children at some unspecified date in the distant future =P. Though, to be honest, I'd have no trouble marrying a woman who knew she didn't want kids, but I WOULD have trouble marrying someone who *definitely* wanted kids, so I guess that suggests my true feelings on the subject. I keep an open mind though, because I know my mind may well change as I age some .
One thing that gives me pause is that life changes. It won't always be the way it is right now. Sure, in your late 20s, being single and childless is perfectly fine. But I can see that as you age, it may begin to become a lonely proposition. As everyone around you marries off, and has kids, and then your parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles pass away, it could become lonely indeed - especially around holidays and so forth. And then I look at my grandmothers. In the twilight of their life, their family is their joy. Despite their infirmities and age, they love to spend time with their children and their grandchildren. Really, at their advanced age, that's mostly all they have.
Not a reason to have kids, certainly, just some thoughts .
Dinks! Research shows that, statistically speaking, they are the happiest of family constellations.
That's debatable. From what I've read, childless couples have a higher rate of divorce. Disagreeing about whether to have children is a pretty big deal-breaker. This is not to say that DINKs secretly want children or that they can't be happy, because that's obviously untrue, but it is debatable whether they are happier. It depends on how you measure happiness, I guess, and that's not easy.
Um, don't you have to arrange it so you can both take vacations at the same time? Whereas if only one person worked, the other person would be available anytime?
Just to point something out--a couple where only one person worked would not, by definition, be DINKs.
I can see the appeal of wanting one parent to stay at home with the children, but I don't really see the benefit of staying home when there aren't any kids in the house. My housework would be minimal if we didn't have children. Sure, volunteering and having a lot of social events would be fun and fulfilling, but so would having more money.
That's debatable. From what I've read, childless couples have a higher rate of divorce. Disagreeing about whether to have children is a pretty big deal-breaker. This is not to say that DINKs secretly want children or that they can't be happy, because that's obviously untrue, but it is debatable whether they are happier. It depends on how you measure happiness, I guess, and that's not easy.
that's why you don't marry someone until you know that they're with you on the kids thing.
that's why you don't marry someone until you know that they're with you on the kids thing.
True, but some people do change their minds. I'm sure many childless couples discussed it beforehand.
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