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Triton1,
Are there any women in the County of your home that also have Autism? I'm thinking you could hook up with them. Maybe practice talking with them? If anybody has inside knowledge of what it's like to be you it be would someone who has the same thing going on inside their head as you. Awhile back I had some troubles, I found some women who had the same thing going on and started to learn how to talk with women.
I am not accessing it from prison! I am accessing it from my work computer. I teach Floral Design at College of DuPage and that troll was the worst student in my class!
mesay, my post was directed to triton. what the heck is going on between you and triton? is triton in prison for something he did to you?
In a huge sprawling area like Chicago, there must be some sort of club/group/gatherings, etc. for adults with autism. They would most certainly understand the trials and tribulations and could relate better than the joe or betty on the street. Heck, you might even meet a nerdy autistic girl who likes antiques and plants... and you.
P.S.~ Not sure how you came up with the notion that Florida girls are any friendlier than anywhere else... the only waitress I ever hugged was my sister... around 20 years ago.
i dont go for regular women especially in the city i go out in the suburbs because its harder to live in a big city the people have to work twice as hard so if you autistic you not going find a good woman fast in a big city all you going find is a bum most of the regular women work all the time they not focused on looking for a man in big cities go out in the suburbs
Last edited by andreedwards; 02-09-2008 at 05:27 AM..
the best thing for an autistic person to do is get into a school program or get a job or go to event where its people like them they not going get a regular woman unless its a bum no one wants a bum i been thru that it dont go on no more i dont try to get a regular woman i go for slow ones in the suburbs to be with a regular woman a man have to be stable
1) Focus on the solution, not the problem. Stop going over your failures, real and perceived, and those of others. No more stewing in your own juices!
2) Write a list of ten positive things you can do to make your life happier right where you are, right now. Include suggestions others on this forum have offered.
3) Choose one thing to take some positive action on each day.
Everytime you start to complain, feel sorry for yourself or be upset with someone, give yourself 15 minutes to feel upset. Then take a deep breath or count to ten and look at what you can do, at that moment, to make life more positive for you.
4) No excuses, no blaming others.
5) Don't believe that the grass will be greener in Florida. You will take YOU with you wherever you go. Whatever your coping skills are now are what your coping skills will be when you get there. There will be hurt, upset and disappointment in Florida, just as there is in Illinois. If you're lucky there may be less, but there is no guarantee. We all have hopes and dreams we plan toward, but the FANTASY is almost always better than the REALITY.
6) Find another adult that you can trust to talk with (even a pastor or a counselor). It definitely sounds like you've had some big issues with making good judgements and setting good boundaries for yourself. You need someone to give you guidance until you learn to do this better for yourself.
7) If you have done things that crossed the line or brought negative attention to yourself in your community, people will continue to judge you for that. You then have to behave in a way that shows you are using good judgement and you have to do that consistently for a long time. Some people will then begin to be more friendly and accepting.
8) For at least three months, stop focusing on having a girlfriend. Instead of feeling desperate for this kind of relationship, just focus on how to be a friend. Find other young adults (male and female) with whom you have things in common or who have similar challenges in life to just be friends with. The more you learn to be a friend, the better you'll be prepared when you meet the young woman who is interested in you. Don't go after a girl who isn't interested, no matter how attractive she is to you. (This is an area where your TRUSTED ADULT can come in handy to give you help and feedback.)
9) Do something that makes you proud of yourself. Learn a skill or hobby, get a part-time volunteer placement, etc.
Many, many young adults go through feeling unaccepted, angry, that they don't fit in and that the world is against them, just as you do. If you have disabilities, life is that much more challenging. Life is filled with rejection. It's also filled with lots of opportunity to succeed and be happy. It just depends on how you use those opportunities.
For every person that rejects you, there is someone nearby that is willing to help you. You just have to be open to those who are kind, helpful and trustworthy. If you're so busy keeping yourself stirred up over how awful the community is and has been to you, you will overlook the very people who will welcome and assist you.
If you change your attitude and your behavior for the better and don't overlook or discount those who are decent to you, your life will change for the better as well.
NOW'S THE TIME TO CHANGE COURSE, GIVE UP THE NEGATIVITY AND FIND A MORE POSITIVE PATH IN LIFE. THE CHOICE IS YOURS IF YOU DECIDE TO MAKE IT!
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from andre
