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I agree with you when you say "Most women are not interested in what those men offer which is pump and dump".
That's why I don't believe in sex before marriage.
I'm a single woman but I've heard a lot of married women around me say that they've lost interest in sex with their husbands because it's gotten very boring, due to the fact that the men are only there to fulfill their own needs, & most of the time they forget about pleasing the women.
That is very selfish for men to do that, & it can worsen if there is a lack of communication which is very important in any relationship.
Well, those men need to read some books about a woman's sexual psychology and learn how to stimulate that clit!
They should make it legal for a guy to have a mistress when his wife is giving him no sex.
I believe it is legal in most places. You won't go to jail for sleeping with someone other than your wife. From the sound of the "alienation of affection" laws, you might be sued in civil court over it in some states.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Black Jack22
What's so funny is that whenever there is a sexless relationship or marriage, the guy is always the one blamed.
That's not true at all. There are plenty of posts where people have guessed that the wife "must have let herself go" or "isn't giving it to her husband." If you haven't seen them, OK, but they are there.
Haha, it needs to be said that the reason some men do not show their wives affection is that their wives do not want to appreciate their husbands either. These ladies are all about me, me, me.
Are we forgetting that a husband's needs are to be taken care of too?
Women who don't respect their men and love them won't receive any love either. That's why some husbands don't listen to their women because their wives don't listen to them.
Think about it, as far as the average man, if his woman is appreciating him and listening to him you can be sure that he will do the same. So often one hears about husbands doing everything to make his family happy but is the most unhappy one in the family.
That's what you get with the reversed roles in western society.
I believe it is legal in most places. You won't go to jail for sleeping with someone other than your wife. From the sound of the "alienation of affection" laws, you might be sued in civil court over it in some states.
That's not true at all. There are plenty of posts where people have guessed that the wife "must have let herself go" or "isn't giving it to her husband." If you haven't seen them, OK, but they arethere.
In this thread, there is an amount of hatred towards the OP, blaming him for the mess he is in. We do not know the whole story. Everyone is assuming that he is not taking care of the needs of his wife. Maybe he was not fully but he seems intent on fixing the problem.
I am quite sure that not every husband or even most is only concerned with his own pleasure in the bedroom.
Okay the first half of this I can get behind - it's really not that much time. I seriously doubt men enjoy doing yardwork or cleaning the garage but they do it because we ask it of them.
Is it our duty as a wife to make a husband happy? Sounds a little old fashioned to me (no offsense honestly - the word 'duty' is what I really have a problem with).
Personally I think this is a problem that should be acknowledged before it becomes a problem. (Easier said than done I'm sure) But, stereotypically, this is a problem that befalls most relationships/marriages. So plan ahead for it? Learn to be open about your sexual desires, needs, and wants while both parties are being routinely satisfied. Maybe toys or roleplay would help. Maybe she just wants a little romance back? A litte foreplay can go a long way. Maybe time should be planned - not very romantic I'll admit, but if it's part of the schedule maybe it will reduce the excuses.
My favorite advice (and I can't remember where it came from) was that a couple, no matter what, never turned each other down. Whether they were mad at each other, one party wasn't in the mood, ect. I'm sure there were exceptions but this along with open communication I think is key.
Are you serious, if more western wives adopted this mindset, there would be happier marriages.
I have heard a trillion times that it is the man's duty to show his wife affection, buy her chocolate, write her love notes, listen to her, show her humor, give her foreplay, whisper dirty things in her ear, give her massages ect.
That goes back to what I have preaching in this forum, that wives are supposed submit to their husbands and they will receive the love and emotional connection that they are seeking. You ladies want to be the man and be like a man.
In this thread, there is an amount of hatred towards the OP, blaming him for the mess he is in. We do not know the whole story. Everyone is assuming that he is not taking care of the needs of his wife. Maybe he was not fully but he seems intent on fixing the problem.
I am quite sure that not every husband or even most is only concerned with his own pleasure in the bedroom.
You seem to be intent on victimizing men. Do you remember what the original post said? This is not the thread that Sprawling posted, where he said a friend of his begs his wife for sex and gets nothing. This is the Tonyandclaire thread where he said that wives generally quit putting out and that Tiger Woods's wife was probably frigid and therefore deserved to be cheated on. The OP also alluded to not getting any at home.
Not "everyone is assuming" anything. I see five responses on the first page (five out of nine--more than half) that do not blame the man or assume that it's his fault.
A man and a woman should be having sex a few times everyweek, what's wrong with you?
All women are not are puritan as you are miu.
Sex with a man for the sake of pure sexual release isn't that important to me. If I really just wanted sexual release and was single, masturbation is much more satisfying (for me) than having sex with some random guy I have no feelings for.
But when I am in a relationship, I enjoy showing affection to my s/o by making love with him. But should he demand that I do something with his raging erection, that would not be appealing to me. Shrug.
Am I puritanical? I think not. After all, I don't think that having sex is only for the purpose of procreation. I also don't have a problem with having sexual relations with a man that I am not married to, as long as we have an emotional commitment to each other.
I just am not interested in having sex without being in love with my man. And one of the most wonderful things about my current boyfriend is that we can cuddle and not have it always lead to making love. We give each other affectionate body massages and sometimes it leads to making love, and sometimes it doesn't. When he rubs my feet, it's because he knows that I've had a hard day's work on my feet... and so his foot and shoulder rubs are because he loves me, and just not an automatic prelude to sexual relations. My boyfriend is an highly evolved human being... and from reading this thread, I count myself extremely lucky to have him love me and nobody else.
Sex with a man for the sake of pure sexual release isn't that important to me. If I really just wanted sexual release and was single, masturbation is much more satisfying (for me) than having sex with some random guy I have no feelings for.
But when I am in a relationship, I enjoy showing affection to my s/o by making love with him. But should he demand that I do something with his raging erection, that would not be appealing to me. Shrug.
Am I puritanical? I think not. After all, I don't think that having sex is only for the purpose of procreation. I also don't have a problem with having sexual relations with a man that I am not married to, as long as we have an emotional commitment to each other.
I just am not interested in having sex without being in love with my man. And one of the most wonderful things about my current boyfriend is that we can cuddle and not have it always lead to making love. We give each other affectionate body massages and sometimes it leads to making love, and sometimes it doesn't. When he rubs my feet, it's because he knows that I've had a hard day's work on my feet... and so his foot and shoulder rubs are because he loves me, and just not an automatic prelude to sexual relations. My boyfriend is an highly evolved human being... and from reading this thread, I count myself extremely lucky to have him love me and nobody else.
Well miu,
So your boyfriend is gigantigussuperioussapien?
Sexually release is eventually the goal but I think that what you are referring to is a guy neglecting the sexual needs of his woman. Keep in mind that men need to ejaculate.
Of course foreplay is important, even when it does not lead to sex!
But a woman should try as hard to please her man sexually as he would do unto her.
Even after I have my sexually release, I can still please my woman sexually with my mouth and hands.
There is more to sex than the intercourse, I agree but it is a two way street of sexual pleasure for both the man and woman.
You seem to be intent on victimizing men. Do you remember what the original post said? This is not the thread that Sprawling posted, where he said a friend of his begs his wife for sex and gets nothing. This is the Tonyandclaire thread where he said that wives generally quit putting out and that Tiger Woods's wife was probably frigid and therefore deserved to be cheated on. The OP also alluded to not getting any at home.
Not "everyone is assuming" anything. I see five responses on the first page (five out of nine--more than half) that do not blame the man or assume that it's his fault.
According to the women on this Relationship Forum, they LOVE to claim that a woman's sex drive increases as she gets older.
They should make it legal for a guy to have a mistress when his wife is giving him no sex. What's so funny is that whenever there is a sexless relationship or marriage, the guy is always the one blamed.
Ok so let me get this straight....it should be legal to have a mistress if the wife isn't giving sex? How many men think it is OK for a wife to have a boy toy when their power sword ceases to work? Erectile dysfunction is prevalent in over 50 age group but thanks to Viagara and the likes they get the old clunker to be a sports car. Unfortunately many seem to think once they get the updated sportscar they need to park it in a strange garage not at home! Just sayin'
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