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The women who see this are generally over 60 but there are some who are younger. There was a major shift in women's perceptions of what made a good catch between 40 and 45 years ago.
I used to think it related to their experience but now I realize that younger women have been indoctrinated into thinking of potential mates as someone who makes their life better by what they have rather than who they are.
Hi WhyShouldIWorry,
I don't think this has changed. What has changed is the generational veil of protection. Family pressure would protect the family jewel as a beautiful young girl is. You can certainly see this now in the middle east with honor killings which may be considered exploitative here. However the western variety was her long term interests were generally managed by her elders. What has changed?
Now young girls make their own choices and older men who know how to charm their pant's off can get to them with ease. Imagine a 25 year old with an 18 year old in a small village doing this. It was called shotgun wedding. Now a plausible path, with artistic exaggeration, is 5 ersatz prince charmings , pump and dump, depression, mid night ice cream, plumpness, crows feet and cats at 35.
Note to the males in here who are saying ALL WOMEN are looking for swagger and game:
1) Stop looking for love "in da club" or any other place where club goers socialize. The only thing they're useful for is one night stands.
2) Stop looking at the hottest piece of A$$ as the measuring stick for how ALL women are. There are plenty of damn good looking geeky girls as well as average looking girls with great personalities.
3) Get out of "mainstream urban/liberal America where people are more shallow and materialistic. I'm sure there are plenty of beautiful small town and country girls who value personality over materials.
Note to the males in here who are saying ALL WOMEN are looking for swagger and game
Who's saying that. However read many of their posts and this is EXACTLY what they say they want.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Fairfaxian
1) Stop looking for love "in da club" or any other place where club goers socialize. The only thing they're useful for is one night stands.
2) Stop looking at the hottest piece of A$$ as the measuring stick for how ALL women are. There are plenty of damn good looking geeky girls as well as average looking girls with great personalities.
I've never done any of this. However, it is in other venues where this really stings. Everyone knows that they need to be a prime cut to be successful in a meat market.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Fairfaxian
Get out of "mainstream urban/liberal America where people are more shallow and materialistic. I'm sure there are plenty of beautiful small town and country girls who value personality over materials.
I grew up in this environment and contrary to what you say, it was the worst. Lots of teen pregnancy and very shallow thinking.
Some 'liberal" women actually do look for more than this but they are snapped up fast.
Note to the males in here who are saying ALL WOMEN are looking for swagger and game:
1) Stop looking for love "in da club" or any other place where club goers socialize. The only thing they're useful for is one night stands.
2) Stop looking at the hottest piece of A$$ as the measuring stick for how ALL women are. There are plenty of damn good looking geeky girls as well as average looking girls with great personalities.
3) Get out of "mainstream urban/liberal America where people are more shallow and materialistic. I'm sure there are plenty of beautiful small town and country girls who value personality over materials.
Why else do I no longer go to clubs to meet women?
When i was dating I would initially approach a woman.
However if afterwards she could not at least attempt to put forth equal effort if she is attracted it ended.
We are both human, so why not try to be as equal as we can.
I've always been one who thought the whole tradition of 'pursuit' was silliness designed to give women the real power and choice in mating.
And it worked well for the most part. Plus as others have said, at one time in the USA, women looked for men to provide for the financially.
Now since women are doing well for themselves, that dependent situation is no longer necessary.
I will say this.
If anyone of either gender out there is complaining about not meeting the right people, and not willing to make an initial approach, then you do not deserve to meet the right person.
Personal relationships should be the part of our lives where we exert the most effort because one is more likely to succeed on certain qualities compared to other aspects of life.
Note to the males in here who are saying ALL WOMEN are looking for swagger and game:
1) Stop looking for love "in da club" or any other place where club goers socialize. The only thing they're useful for is one night stands.
2) Stop looking at the hottest piece of A$$ as the measuring stick for how ALL women are. There are plenty of damn good looking geeky girls as well as average looking girls with great personalities.
3) Get out of "mainstream urban/liberal America where people are more shallow and materialistic. I'm sure there are plenty of beautiful small town and country girls who value personality over materials.
Hi The_Fairfaxian,
I am talking about college. Also the one night stands are not really the problem since most women get that situation. It can be the 1-2 year serial monogamy that does the damage.
Anyway, the point is the young girl is now the only decision maker in this process which is a vastly different view on mate selection. Fraternities and sororities were initially invented to make sure the kiddies were meeting the "right class" of people. The idea is she would not even meet the bad boy.
The women who see this are generally over 60 but there are some who are younger. There was a major shift in women's perceptions of what made a good catch between 40 and 45 years ago.
I used to think it related to their experience but now I realize that younger women have been indoctrinated into thinking of potential mates as someone who makes their life better by what they have rather than who they are.
Well, whatever the case, my grandmother harped on marriage. When you getting married? To just about everyone.
Why don't men pursue women anymore? Seems it only happens in the movies.
In my own experience, men will give me their phone numbers....and ask me to call them....and I'm 45 years old! This seems messed up.
Any comments gentlemen? Preferably men over 40 to answer please.
(not that the young guys can't answer this.....they don't seem to be the ones afraid....it's the older ones)
I turned 40 today and came back to the dating world about a year or so ago.
The answer is simple: We don't have to and got sick of doing it when we were in our 20's.
Women had all the power back in their youth and guys had to chase etc. and the game has at least balanced if not tipped in favor of the guys....but many women haven't figured it out yet and still expect to be chased.
Any gal that tries to make me chase her and establish herself as "in control" of the situation...will be sitting home alone while I go out with someone else.
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Seems it only happens in the movies.
