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I like dating men who are dads. They usually act grown up. I run into too many men over 40 who never were married and no children who act like as if they just got out of high school. Dads IMO are more caring, responsible, and have more common sense - just my personal experience. Example, when we go somewhere, they are prepared, they bring stuff, they plan it out, etc.
Unfortunately, it is now so common and accepted to be a single parent, that around here you may get rejected if you don't have any yourself. Things have turned 180. Same thing with weed - before I can reject a drug user, they reject me for not being a stoner, wth?
I like dating men who are dads. They usually act grown up. I run into too many men over 40 who never were married and no children who act like as if they just got out of high school. Dads IMO are more caring, responsible, and have more common sense - just my personal experience. Example, when we go somewhere, they are prepared, they bring stuff, they plan it out, etc.
Unfortunately, it is now so common and accepted to be a single parent, that around here you may get rejected if you don't have any yourself. Things have turned 180. Same thing with weed - before I can reject a drug user, they reject me for not being a stoner, wth?
I am perfectly happy "rejecting" someone who has no kids. And I don't find it the slightest bit unfortunate anymore than someone rejecting me because I don't smoke enough weed. wth? Compatibility is the "heck".
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 37,083,947 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
I like dating men who are dads. They usually act grown up. I run into too many men over 40 who never were married and no children who act like as if they just got out of high school.
Hey, that's just out of college!
He says as he plans to fly to music fest and rock out this weekend...
He says as he plans to fly to music fest and rock out this weekend...
Nothing wrong with that. But do you live paycheck to paycheck, have big (delusional) plans for "later" (you are over 40, so NOW is LATER) and drive a car you cannot afford?
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 37,083,947 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
Nothing wrong with that. But do you live paycheck to paycheck, have big (delusional) plans for "later" (you are over 40, so NOW is LATER) and drive a car you cannot afford?
Well if those big delusional plans include things like retiring someday... then yes. Paid cash for the car though.
Well if those big delusional plans include things like retiring someday... then yes.
No, naive plans a high school graduate would have. I see that alot around here. Men with children are more realistic and responsible because they HAD to grow up once they had to take care of a baby.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 37,083,947 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
No, naive plans a high school graduate would have. I see that alot around here. Men with children are more realistic and responsible because they HAD to grow up once they had to take care of a baby.
Well, I don't want to be "realistic" enough to not have dreams. Just reasonable enough to save enough to make them happen. Being "normal" and "responsible" (which I often see as just boring and sedate) isn't my thing. Each to their own.
Sadly, I just exited one of these relationships, not because of my ex (well, not totally,) but because there is too much drama.
First, we will never understand what you are feeling about your child, nor will we ever feel the same about your seed.
Second, we don't want to deal with baby-mama or daddy drama - what that means is ever seeing, talking to or ever hearing their voice.
Thirdly, Why would ANYONE ever want to be second, third, etc.
Fourth, we know why you want to date us singles...for the reason listed above, so why not just stick to your own kind.
Fifth, we can't discipline or have a say in how much you spend on your ex/child, so what do you think is the great appeal about you...unless you are a model?
Sixth, if we ever married, you wad is blown on your previous kids, so?
Elighten me as to what the appeal is?
I imagine only single parent will respond will respond with "selffish" but that's not is, it's called doing it right the first time.
Single guy here (never married, never had kids) dating a single mom. There is so much wrong with your post.
First - while it will never be the same as loving your own biological child, I think it is possible to truly love their children. I have met my SO's children and absolutely adore them and they really seem to love me. Sometimes the fit is just right and you can love their children.
Second - I appreciate what you're saying here. I have not met her ex and don't really care to. It seems like they are co-parenting just fine. If there comes a time where I have to meet him, I will be cordial, although honestly he sounds like an arrogant POS. I will take the higher road because that's the father of her kids and I don't see any need for there to be drama. People who attract drama seem to thrive on it, but it's not for me.
Third - I also appreciate what you are saying here. I knew going in that she had kids and accepted that before we even went on our first date. We just had a discussion where the guy she was seeing before me was complaining that he wasn't the priority. She told him he never would be. Instead of being understanding and mature about it, he reacted in a way that was childish and she ended it with him. If her kids weren't her priority, I would question her as a mother and as a person.
Fourth - I know plenty of single parents that have ended up with other single parents. Seems strange to throw a blanket label on it so that's all I will say.
Fifth - Also seems strange to say that one size fits all. If things get serious and both parties know how to communicate in a relationship, then this should be something that is discussed ahead of time before it gets very serious, no?
Sixth - not sure what you are trying to get at here, please clarify
I am having the time of my life with the single mom I am currently dating. It just feels right when we are together whether it's a romantic date, a night in watching a movie, a group outing, doing something with her kids, etc. We have a lot in common, a strong physical and emotional connection, and both see this as a potential long term thing. 15 years ago I may have had the same thoughts/concerns you did, but I have matured and with that came an open mind.
I like dating men who are dads. They usually act grown up. I run into too many men over 40 who never were married and no children who act like as if they just got out of high school. Dads IMO are more caring, responsible, and have more common sense - just my personal experience. Example, when we go somewhere, they are prepared, they bring stuff, they plan it out, etc.
THIS! You nailed it, SISTAH!
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve;
Unfortunately, it is now so common and accepted to be a single parent, that around here you may get rejected if you don't have any yourself. Things have turned 180. Same thing with weed - before I can reject a drug user, they reject me for not being a stoner, wth?
One of life's many ironies. And this phenom was preceded by the "What? You're not divorced? You've never been married?? What's wrong with you?" phase. "Um...I have my act together?" (no serial divorces) didn't cut it back then. Fortunately, now it's so common for people to be single through their 30's and 40's, (in some parts of the US), it's no longer an issue. Now the thing is to be a single parent. Somehow, it doesn't sound like progress.
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