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The United States has got to be the most extreme Western country when it comes to sex. When I say "extreme," I mean that we're the most uptight Western country when it comes to sex and conversely the most over-sexualized Western country (especially if you watch/listen to mainstream media). I see that our culture is, on the one hand, titillated by female sexuality and on the other hand repulsed and afraid of it. With these kinds of mixed messages, is it any wonder that women grow up feeling confused about their sexuality?
What I'd like to see is a culture with a golden middle: where sexuality isn't put to shame by parents, religious groups, and abstinence-only education, nor are people encouraged by the entertainment world to engage in total debauchery. When I was 13, I got a really good comprehensive sex education from the Unitarian Church. They're one of the only groups out there that seems to understand that our culture needs a golden middle.
LOL why don't you just say what you really want to say. You're mad because the one bargaining chip girls have over us guys (sex) is starting to dry up. If girls just "give it away" then the guy doesn't have to buy her things or slave away, like he normally would. I bet you would see nothing wrong with girls "giving it away" if the guys did what she wanted first. Or if the guy bought her things and treated her like a queen and got NOTHING in return. Its like if someone put two plates of food in front of your face, the first one you can get for free. the second one, you have to pay $50 for it...which one would you choose?
There is no reason why any guy should have to be some chivalrous pinhead and slave away if he wants sex....and with all of this new age talk about how girls are supposedly more mature than boys in the teenage years, then I fail to see how the boys take advantage, can't have it both ways
By that rationale, women no longer have any use for men whatsoever. If they want to have children, they can go to a sperm bank. There's no need to put up with a burpin', fartin', pickin', scratchin' male then, is there? Who needs a man slung around your neck making life harder than it has to be? Who wants to hear some dumb man whine and moan about dinner when a gal can be quite happy with a bowl of soup? Who wants pee on her toilet rim and on the floor from some dumb man's bad aim? Who wants to worry about some dumb man getting bombed at a bar and coming home with either an STD or a wife-beating attitude? There is no reason why any woman should have to be tied down to some man and slave away if she wants kids.
As there is currently enough frozen sperm in existence to keep the human race going for quite some time, I guess men are obsolete.
And you know what we do with obsolete technology...
To see the roots of a teenager's behavior, look at the parents.
And as long as you're looking at the parents, they came of age in the 70s--post-Pill, pre-AIDS. Hmmmm...
However, I will say this: When it comes to "giving it up so easily," today's teen girls and young women are only acting like teen boys and young men have been acting since time began.
So, your point is...?
See, if there's one thing I can't stand, it's when people pin what they perceive to be "loose morals" on girls, with no mention of boys whatsoever. Who do you think these "easy girls" are sleeping with?
They are sleeping with anyone that shows interest in them. Do you think boys are sleeping with girls because mommy doesn't pay enough attention to them? It's just not the same. It disgusts me how some boys treat girls like garbage they can just throw away. I don't condone how boys sleep with anything that moves either. There will always be a double standard unfortunately. I did not make the rules for society. My beliefs are somewhat old fashioned in that I think sex in your teens can affect how you view sex for the rest of your life. If you treat it like nothing special and abuse it then how special do you think it will be as an adult? How will you view men if you were the type of girl that slept with anyone that paid attention to you and then you couldn't figure out why you were dumped the next day? Will you end of hating men as an adult woman or keep making the same mistakes you made as a teen, looking for love by giving away sex? Either way life has a way of catching up to you eventually. Why do you think therapy is so popular?
Its not a coincidence that America is also the most religious of the western countries. The pilgrims emmigrated because they thought England was not conservative enough... ENGLAND.
Pretty sure the Pilgrams immigrated for religious freedom. Yes they were puritans and America as a whole is much more uptight about sex than Europe especially about the naked body, but it is also an accepted practice for husbands to have mistresses in European countries where here...not so much
See, if there's one thing I can't stand, it's when people pin what they perceive to be "loose morals" on girls, with no mention of boys whatsoever. Who do you think these "easy girls" are sleeping with?
Let's take this into the 21st Century. The teen-age boys know that if they act in an overt sexual manner, they could be accused of sexual harassment. And they know if a girl leads them on and then says "no," they'd better remove themselves from the situation or they could very well be accused of rape or attempted rape. They also know that if they produce a child, they will probably be forced to pay child support for the next 18 years.
Now, I am GLAD that males are being forced to be responsible. And I'm GLAD that there is much awareness of date rape and protection for girls from unwanted sexual pressure. I actively supported one teen-age girl in filing sexual harassment charges against a male student because she did nothing to encourage the behavior and I personally heard the continuous sexual remarks he made to her in public.
HOWEVER, all of this gives girls the freedom to behave in any way they wish with virtually no repercussions. Boys would be ridiculed and made to feel ashamed if they reported girls for sexually harassing them. Yet, that's exactly what we see girls doing. They rub themselves up against boys, touch them inappropriately, and do everything in their power to get the boys' attention.
OMG, in the cafeteria, we would see girls purposely plunk themselves down in front of a boy and do pseudo-sexual things to bananas and other similarly-shaped food items! And when the teachers/staff would tell them to knock it off, they'd just laugh at us. The boys were embarrassed by this stuff.
If anything, we need to empower the boys to stand up for their rights, too, and not be ashamed to report inappropriate behavior.
I want to know why (a certain female mod) hasn't closed THIS thread for "ugliness" like the one the other day!
Other than that (and the inherent male-bashing since it's been stated repeatedly in this thread that we "males" praise our sons for promiscuity while we vilify our daughters OR ignore them completely, let alone one guy's flippant answer being referred to as typically male), this thread RAWKS!!!!
My beliefs are somewhat old fashioned in that I think sex in your teens can affect how you view sex for the rest of your life. If you treat it like nothing special and abuse it then how special do you think it will be as an adult? How will you view men if you were the type of girl that slept with anyone that paid attention to you and then you couldn't figure out why you were dumped the next day? Will you end of hating men as an adult woman or keep making the same mistakes you made as a teen, looking for love by giving away sex? Either way life has a way of catching up to you eventually. Why do you think therapy is so popular?
I think there is a distinction between having sex because just because someone paid attention to you (which is what you are describing), which would indicate insecurity and self esteem issues, and having sex because you enjoy it and want to.
I dont view sex as some holy grail. I dont view sex as "giving it away", but as exchanging gifts. I've had a good deal of sex as a teen and continued into my 40+. Some in LTR, some STR, some with my husbands, some FBW some with strangers in the dark. It is sex, its enjoyable and each act of sex is special in some way.
If one is adversely affected in their adult life by the sex they had as a teen, it is because of the underlying reasons, the sex was just a way of acting on the insecurities.
If a girl's having sex to bolster her low self-esteem, it isn't the sex that's causing the low self-esteem, it's the low self-esteem that's causing the low self-esteem. The sex is a symptom of the problem, NOT the problem itself.
if one is adversely affected in their adult life by the sex they had as a teen, it is because of the underlying reasons, the sex was just a way of acting on the insecurities.
I think the real question is that as long as the teenage girls aren't getting pregnant and making babies and as long as they aren't getting or spreading STD's, are promiscuous girls really a problem? I'm talking societally here, not religiously. Obviously if it's against your religion to have sex before marriage, then it's a problem whether or not you're a teen girl.
This is what's wrong the young girls, people who try to find reason with early sex and negative behavior. What's wrong with religion; what's wrong with following a bible that teaches people how to live a respectable and great life. What's wrong with promoting good behavior over bad?
Want to talk societally. Most young girls are not mature enough to be responsible, therefore getting pregnant and spreading STD's is becoming the norm for these children. And, anyone that argue's different is bonkers'
It's sad, I have 3 boys and my oldest pretty much don't have to do anything and girls throw themselves at him. Say they will do all these things to him!! And, I try and try to remind him to have respect for females and one day he said, " mom you need to talk to the females because they have no respect for themselves".
I blame the ADULTS - parents, porn flicks, tv & computers, etc.
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